- 6 years ago
- Wedding: March 2012
So…the dilemma is is that do you think it would be out of my place to ask my future in laws to refrain from inviting someone to our wedding?
I dont know what it is, but his god sister (a close family friend, of whom my future in laws are fond of), is sabotaging my fiance’s as well as my character because of a disagreement that my fiance and her had.
To provide insight, this is what had happened:
The God Sister (whom we will call “M”), A close family friend, that my Future in laws have grown to love because of a long history they have with eachother…
God Sister’s husband (whom we will call “C”)
So My fiance asked C to help him fix a car on the side. (The car happened to belong to a very clsoe family friend of mine who they are practically like family to me). Since C had a lot of tools stored at his house, he told my fiance to bring it to his house. While they were estimating what kind of things the car needed, C told my fiance that he would be willing to split the profit that they earn from fixing the car. My fiance agreed, and purchased all the parts with money from his own pocket and took it down to C’s house.
However, once there, C kept putting it off. The owner of the car stated that they needed it fixed within 2 weeks, and being that there was a lot to do, they needed to get working. My fiance drove down to C’s house everyday and began working on the things himself since C was not helping. He finished just about everything, but there was an electrical problem he couldn’t seem to pinpoint. so he asked C to at least look into it.
When there is only about 2 days before 2 weeks is up, C finally gets his butt up and takes the car to his friend to help him figure out the issue. C, takes credit for figuring it out, and tells my fiance that he can pay him whenever for his portion.
My fiance is a bit weak at the heart, and apparently, C told him tha the total of all the work that they did, was $800. HOwever, my fiance did emphasize that it was a close family friend. Then, C, told my fiance, that he needed to pay C $600 of the $800. My fiance, for whatever reason, agreed, but told him he needs to get paid by the owner of the car.
My close family friend, wiithout blinking an eye, gave my fiance the total for parts and labor. The total was for $1200. My fiance got the check on a Friday night, thus, he went to go deposit the check on Saturday morning. However, being that the amount was large, and also because It was Memorial weekend, The bank decided that they were going to hold half of the check.
My fiance was in between jobs at the moment, hence, whatever half was not frozen was what he had to live off for the following month. He told C the situation, and C said that it was “Not a problem and to give it to him” once the bank releases the other portion.
However, M, not even knowing the whole situation, got really snarky, and called my fiance, yelling at him. She started to demand the money and asked him if I was in on the scam trying to con him. She started to progress to say how my close family friend probably wrote a bad check, and that is why he can’t give the money to her husband, C. She kept demanding the money and she continued to point the finger as if I set my fiance up with a bad business deal.
My fiance doesn’t take confrontation very well, hence, I told him to go to the ATM, and withdraw half of the $600 he had which was available, and I would dip into my money to fund the other half (which I put aside for rent).
We went down to her house and when we walked in, she seemed surprised and she was like trying to hug on me and stuff. I was so turned off. Especially hearing everything that she said over the phone. She than asked why I was there and what we were doing without any warning. So I told her that we came because she was demanding the money. She looked bewildered and confused. And she said she only called to say hello. So I told her how I heard everything. But than she kept telling me to calm down, but obviously, I was upset. And I told her I dont appreciate her calling me a liar and a con artist. She was starting to backtrack on what she said at this point and she began to come at me saying how my fiance was such a good person that she thought he got taken advantage of. And I told her, C said it was okay, so what is your problem? But she than began to try and ignore me and started to try and talk to my fiance since he is less likely to fight back.
I just could feel her stubborn and 2 faced nature that I got turned off and we left. I told my fiance to just ignore it and never deal with them and their shady ways again. In the meantime, she called my future father in law, and was sobbing and telling him I was attacking her and that she didn’t do anything and she didn’t understand why I was mad and that her husband had pressured her to get the money from my fiance. If that was the case, why didn’t she just tell that to my fiance without making a big scene about it? Thus, it made me look like a horrible person, but I just let it slide and didn’t do anything else. However, my father in law asked me and my fiance to just be civil. He told us, we dont have to like her, and to refrain from doing any further business with her and her family, but to just to deal with her because after all, she is like a daughter to them.
But to be totally honest, she doesn’t do crap for them. I always go out of my way to take care of them and do things for them. However, I feel like they always take her side (for the simple fact that they known her longer). I feel like I’m really gettting the short end of the stick and I dont really know what to do.
But to make matters worse, she even went as far as to tell my FFIL that I and my fiance emailed her and cursed her out in an email. But the funny thing is, neither my fiance and I know her email address. However, my FFIL was not hearing it, and instead took her side on the matter and told us to just “be nice.”
Yet, what put the icing on the cake, was that a few days ago, she told my FFIL that she called my fiance numerous times to apologize, but we ignore her and that she has even left VMs even. However, my fiance and I have yet to have heard from her and I dont even know her phone number. My fiance has not had any missed calls nor any VMs from her. However, my FFIL will not cease to hear anything my fiance says, and does not event inquire about how I feel about the whole incident.
I feel torn, because I dont want to make a bad impression on my father in law, since he is the one dishing out some serious cash for our wedding, but at this point, I dont even want to have the wedding here anymore and I’m willing to consider my losses with all the deposits that have been made, and go have our wedding in Hawaii (since no one but immediate family will be willing to travel).
I feel that this is especially crap because She has ripped my fiance’s family off so many years. Everytime that she was in a financial deadlock, my Future In laws always stepped in and saved her. They probably lost like $100,000 because of her. She never does anything for my future in laws. I always buy them their medications, and I check in on them, and I see them regularly. She always tells them she’s busy and only comes climbing up their tree when she needs something. She racked up a credit card bill of like $20,000, but they didn’t say much to her, while my fiance used the account to put down deposits for our wedding, and his parents got all in a tissy because he spent $5000.
I told my fiance to tell his parents that we are coming up this weekend because I wanted to discuss his god sister and how she is affecting me. Any suggestions on what I should do or what I should say? I want to respect their feelings, but I am tired of always being the nice person here. 🙁