Post # 1
I’m a regular poster, but going anonymous in this case. I made a very big mistake about 5 years ago and I’m concerned about it coming back to bite me.
5 years ago, I was 19 and dating a guy who I really cared about. I did THINK he was the one, but stuff did fall apart (but better things came into place later!) I gave him one or two pictures of me without clothing. I don’t remember details, poses, etc. but I know that is something that I did. Obviously in retrospect I know that that was a very bad and stupid idea. If I could go back and fix it, I really would.
So now, fast forward a few years, I’m getting married in a few months and my engagement is about to be announced in the paper. For some reason, I’m suddenly very paranoid that he’ll print those off and send them to my family or something. Our breakup was very ugly when it happened- he had cheated, there were rumors he had gotten this other girl pregnant, all sorts of nasty things. I was really heartbroken that someone who used to be such a good person had become so scummy. For a while, he even led me on that we would get back together and essentially used me for sex. I have heard nothing from him in the last 5 years. Still, I have this paranoia that something could happen with it. He really doesn’t have anything to gain- I’m not a high profile person, he’s with someone else, he’s the one who ended it, etc. It’s unlikely that with his serious, live-in (from what I’ve heard) girlfriend he is stashing pictures of an ex girlfriend on his computer. But I can’t help but be scared.
Any words of comfort? Anyone been in this situation before?
Post # 3
@incognitobumblebee: I really doubt he still has those pictures after all this time. If he did, there’s no point in using them. Even if he is a tool, humiliating you wouldn’t really benefit him in any way at this point.
Post # 4
I would try not to worry about it. My ex had, like, dozens of nudie pictures of me, so don’t worry, you certainly didn’t do some crazy thing that no one in the world has done. He doesn’t have anything to gain by humiliating you–he’s the one who would look the fool anyway, not you.
Post # 5
@incognitobumblebee: I can’t imagine after all of this time he’d still have them/use them! I suppose it’s still a risk at any time though…Especially being in the public eye of any form.
Yet, it’s a risk you will have to take. You cannot live your life in fear that the pictures you sent to someone you loved will end up in the public eye.
If he does attempt to slut shame you, stay strong and hire a good lawyer.
I really hope this works out well for you! Congrats on the engagement!
Post # 5
incognitobumblebee: Deny it and say it is photoshopped!!! I mean in this age it is so easy to do( edit and print and they will look legit! Just be ready to deny it – that’s what i would do. Especially if break up was ugly . If he is capable of revealing something like that he is capable of faking them too. :o)
PS Oh uh! Is this thread 5 month old? LOL I am so lost…
Post # 6
If worst comes to absolute worst, it REALLY won’t be that bad. Everyone will know that they are old, old photos from a not, so smart, time in your life and that obviously a vindictive person is responsible.
And then when you are in the nursing home you can tell this story and laugh about your wild days.