Am I Right To Be Upset?!

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Am I Right To Be Upset?
    Yes, you're right to be upset : (78 votes)
    72 %
    No, it was a joke, get over it : (25 votes)
    23 %
    Other (please explain below) : (6 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    450 posts
    Helper bee

    Yes you are way over reacting to what seems to have been a joke on your FIs part and I think you should just let it go.

    To be honest whilst I was reading this I was thinking why are you doing this while your grandma is skyping with you – it seemed incredibly rude not to be giving her your full attention.  It seems she thought so to as you then say she ended the call.  I think you should stop fussing about your grandmother seeing your bum and apologise to her instead for your lack if manners!

    Post # 3
    Member
    1466 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Mrs_Purple:  … I would be so so so upset if this happened to me, self conscious or not. Boundaries! Your FI should apologize!

    Post # 4
    Member
    280 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    It doesn’t matter what I think because you are clearly upset and it’s no one’s job to try to tell you how you should feel. You have the right to feel upset and no one should take that away from you.

    However, I personally would not be upset. I mean to me it’s not a big deal if my grandmother sees me naked. She’s seen me naked tons of times and I’ve seen her naked. It’s not like the person who saw you naked was a complete stranger. She is family.

    Just out of curiosity, how did your family handle nakedness? Was it seen as shameful or was someone’s nakedness not a big deal? I think we carry with us certain things about our childhood as we get older. You may just carry the idea that being naked in front of people (who are not your fiance/husband) is shameful.

    Post # 5
    Member
    8821 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    It may have been a joke and you could be overreacting, but the point is that it upset you. You were embarassed and clearly your FI knows that, he should apologize.

    FWIW I’d be very, very upset too.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2704 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2015

    I would be furious as well as mortified.

    It is strange you were doing naked pushups while on skype with your gramma though? Not that it justifies your FI acting like a jerk, just strange. I would want an apology.

    Post # 7
    Member
    42490 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I would be upset, but I would also get over it. I’m sure you will too. That was very rude and inconsiderate on the part of your FI. Funny, but most often these people wouldn’t think it was so funny if the roles were reversed.

    Post # 8
    Member
    864 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    I think if something upsets you, if that’s your first reaction, then that’s obviously how you feel. That’s okay. However, I have no idea why you’d be calling your grandmother and then decide to get naked to weigh and begin exercising? Seems like you could’ve waited and spoken to her before doing all your naked stuff. 

    Your FI should apologize for hurting your feelings–it wasn’t intentional, but still–and then you should let it go and also learn from this. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    1244 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    Even though it was meant to be funny, I don’t really see the humor in what your FI did and I think she owes you an apology. It’s not ok to show someone’s naked body without their permission. I’m surprised she doesn’t see the problem with that.

    Post # 11
    Member
    143 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I see it a bit both ways- you took off your clothes to get weighed real quick (no problem there), but then instead of getting dressed right quick and getting back to a call to YOUR family, you started goofing off basically. You can do push-ups anytime, I’d be way mad to be on the phone with my DH’s family and have him go off and start exercising. 

    That being said, she didn’t need to do that to you. That wasn’t right. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    3201 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    Mrs_Purple:  Yeah, I wouldn’t find this funny, either. I’d be furious with my FI an completely embarrassed.

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    1305 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I just do not understand why you would choose that moment to exercise. Couldn’t it have waited until after your call? I find that extremely rude to do that during a call to YOUR family member. <br /><br />

    I would be a little upset that she had done that but I think you’re overreacting.

    Post # 14
    Member
    3735 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    Mrs_Purple:  Dick move on behalf of your BF. I think it’s quite forgiveable though once you have a chance to cool down.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1119 posts
    Bumble bee

    I assume that your FI is aware that you have body confidence issues in which case she should have known better than to do that to you. However I’m sure she didn’t do it maliciously. You both need to talk this through and try to find a way to deal with it.

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