Am I stupid for staying???

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@DesiredSpirit:  your relationship sounds so unhealthy and toxic (no offense). he is hitting you. Do you really need to ask if you can trust him, or if you deserve better? of COURSE YOU DESERVE BETTER. real men don’t hit women, and there are a million REAL, GENUINE, CARING men out there. leave. I knew of one abusive relationship that ended in the woman’s DEATH. just leave before this is you. 

Post # 4
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

If he hits you, yes, you deserve better

Post # 6
Member
462 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Honestly (and I’m sorry to say this) I would get out of that relationship. Absuive relationships are not something you deserve, and I would -personally- not trust that him hitting you would not happen again. I understand you love him and I understand this is a difficult postion to be in. I do not think you are stupid for staying, but I would highly advise putting serious thought into whether you can trust him. 

In short, yes, you deserve better than to be abused, and sometimes you have to trust your head over your heart.

With that said, please BE CAREFUL. Be careful if you do decide to end things, and make sure you have someplace SAFE to go. I hope you can figure out what is right for you, I am sending you love.

Post # 7
Member
8905 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

“Do I deserve better?”  – YES.  No one deserves to be physically abused.  LEAVE NOW!

Post # 8
Member
4215 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Don’t walk, run. Run far, far away. Your heart will lie to you and tell it he can change. He will not, not ever. 

Post # 9
Member
432 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Leave; and don’t look back. True Love doesnt hurt!

Post # 10
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

As soon as I read that he hits you, I didn’t need to read further. Get out while you still can. Go, take your things or dont even take anything but go to somewhere you feel safe and never look back. 

Post # 11
Member
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@DesiredSpirit:  Any type of abuse is dangerous to you and to him. You need to get out, and get out now. Go as far away as possible, and make sure your family is aware of the situation so you can lean on them in what is sure to be a very difficult time for you. You deserve so much better than abuse of any kind.

Post # 12
Member
251 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@DesiredSpirit:  you know what, I couldnt finish reading your story,  GET OUT, YOU DESERVE BETTER. Do not sit there and wait till he will hit you and make love to you later. That’s not love. What is wrong with you? stand up for yourself, there are so many good men out there who would love, respect and adore you for who you are and not hurt you. Please leave . I know I am being harsh but I lost 4 years of my life for a man like that, and in a week I am marrieng the great man who loves, respects me and would never ever hurt me.

PLEASE LEAVE

Post # 13
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Leave him, please. You don’t deserve that bullshit.

Post # 14
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@DesiredSpirit:  A real man will never ever hit a woman, EVER.  You need to walk out of this relationship and cut all contact with him.  I have dated over 10 guys and not one has ever raised a hand to me.  Being hit by your partner is not normal and completely unacceptable!

Post # 15
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2010

@DesiredSpirit:  you are not stupid for staying!  Leaving is hard(if you scroll down on the emotional board you will see my post about it).  But what you wrote about is abuse. It made me afraid for your safety.  I suggest calling the national domestic violence hotline, even if you just want to talk. 1-800-799-7233.

you deserve better.  Lundy Bancroft has a book called why does he do that.  There is a section about is he really changing. 

Post # 16
Member
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

When someone shows you who they are, BELIEVE them!!! You need to leave him ASAP! 

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