Am I the only bride Hoping I get a lot of guest declines/rude not to extend +1

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
3280 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I definitely am hoping and expecting declines! Our venue holds 300 so for our first round of invites were sending out 300 then we have about 50 people we plan to invite if we have room! I’m sending them out next week with an RSVP date of May 9th for our June 7th wedding so hopefully we can send a few more out! I’m sure you’ll get some declines, probably 10, but it’s hard to tell with such a small wedding. +1’s were a must for our list and were built into the budget and capacity. 

Post # 3
Member
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Im hoping for the same as well. We originally wanted no more than 50 people yet our “obligatory” list A is already at 82. there are a few going to List B but I’m hoping the out of state relatives decline so we can send out to others. We  will see. 

I hope you have the declines you want as well!

Post # 6
Member
230 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I’m the same we are inviting around 85 but hoping to be closer to 75ish we cut our list down from 105 already 

Post # 8
Member
1377 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

We’re hoping to be around 75, but our list right now is about 110 with our goal of only inviting 100. We’re not inviting +1s unless they are SOs that we know about at the time of ordering invitations. 

Post # 9
Member
230 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

niki24:  Well, My parents are paying for my wedding, so mostly everyone from “our” list was cut. We are hoping we might have little bit more room to invite a few friends/co-workers as my FI’s family has another wedding on the same day so we will see .

Post # 10
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

niki24:  Your are definitely not alone. My FH and I were hoping to have a smaller wedding <70-100 guests after having to ditch our destination wedding plans for a local wedding. We now have had to extend that to 125-150 since we have announced our engagement. I am also hoping that we receive alot of regrets. Our reception is $45pp and our wedding is quickly adding up and we are paying for everything ourselves.

Post # 11
Member
889 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

We are paying for the whole wedding ourselves and have about 75 on our guest list…50-60 would work so much better for us though and would allow us to spend that money on things we will have to sacrifice if everyone accepts!   

Post # 12
Member
1049 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

My guest list includes lots of people who are interstate/international, unwell or I haven’t seen in years and years.  I am expecting quite a high decline rate however as in my family it’s considered very rude to ignore anyone on a certain tier of family (so if I invite 1 Auntie, I have to invite all Aunties etc) and they would get very upset to not receive an invitation, however they will most certainly decline.  

Post # 13
Member
1154 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I’m hoping for a few, I’d like the final count to be around 150 and I’m inviting probably 200, but it is a “destination” wedding in Boston in January so I’m assuming not everyone will be interested.  

Post # 14
Member
1769 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

did you already send out invitations and ppl are now asking you for plus ones? Is it for spouses, SOs, FIs, or just random unknown ppl?

we’ll have under 125 attending after inviting 200 ppl in rounds (b list), but our wedding is also a domestic destination wedding and many of our invitees are pregnant or have young children or are planning their own weddings and short on money and plan on attending our local pre-wedding events instead. We knew approximately 30-40 invitees definitely could not make it before even sending out our invites.  

We invited both ppl of dating, engaged, and married couples and gave plus ones to ppl who didn’t know other single ppl attending.  It looks like only one or two “random” plus ones will be attending. 

Post # 15
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

niki24:  Our guest list went up to the 160’s with all the obligatory invites, but I think we’ll have only 120’s (RSVP deadline in Friday). 120 is what we were hoping for, so we’re actually quite excited to be so close to goal. FI really started freaking out when he saw the parents’ lists, but even he couldn’t talk his mom out of more than 2-3 families. Though I should mention that the wedding will be out of state or 4+ hour drive for about 50-60% of guests. Everyone that lives in town’s coming, but they’re all my family/family friends, and I’m the first one getting married. 

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