Post # 1
Me and my fiancé are sick of the crap surrounding weddings with my family wanting to be in the wedding party or threatening to stand up and say I object, I have relatives who are alcoholics, and I can’t not invite then as they are my uncles… they got into a fist fight at my parents wedding… and showed up drunk, we are now thinking about saying ” screw it! Lets go to city hall pay our 100$ and when its done be like Suprise!!!” Am I the only one?! Please people if you have stories like mine let me know how this went!… I am honestly getting chest pains and headaches just thinking about all the grief my family is giving us. My grandmother is even threatening to not go cause my mom is going…. I think it would just be easier to pay the 100 bucks and get it over with. We were waiting till 2016 when I finish school for financial reasons, but if we chose this option we would have it done much much sooner
Post # 2
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
Make sure whatever you do, it’s what you really want. A city hall wedding could be lovely if it’s what makes you happy. Certainly you should not be getting headaches or chest pains thinking about what’s suppsed to be a wonderful day!
Post # 3
Oh my. I am so sorry you’re going through this. I don’t have a similar story, but if your family’s horrid behavior is causing you this much stress, eloping may be your best option.
Post # 4
Don’t plan your wedding based on what other people want/do. Take time and decide if this is really what you want, or because you’re feeling stressed. If it’s really what you want, hit up city hall, girl! 🙂
Post # 5
At this point we have been engaged 3 years, I am going anonymous as I do not want to risk family finding out. Its even down to my mother vs my grandmother (fathers side ) fighting over who should walk me down the aisle, I am a daddys girl and I lost my daddy when I was 21, 2 years ago… and honestly I would rather this style of wedding to alleviate headaches and not have to worry about dad not being there to walk me down.
Post # 6
anon_bee87: we postponed our wedding five months before the date and cancelled everything we’d booked. now that we are planning a new wedding, a different one, I’ve realised that all those little decor details and things to do with guests, venues etc were all me doing what I wanted but also what I thought everyone else wanted. The guest list went from 25 to 45 because we had to please people, but even at that not everyone who wanted to be invited or thought they should be were. I’ve learned you can’t please everyone. My aunt recently said to me even if we had 500 people there there’d still be someone with their nose out of joint. So family feuds and dramas aside we are now inviting only those WE want, and I am being walked down the aisle by who I want and we’re celebrating it how we want. It’s much simpler and special I think and more about US than the big circus weddings and wedding planning can turn into. So do what you want, it is your wedding. You can’t please everyone. If you want to go to city hall do it, but don’t do it because of the stress from others. Decide what you really want as your wedding and ignore everyone else, you’re the bride it is your special day.
Post # 7
We are eloping. People know that we’re engaged but we have not said one word about when we’re going to City Hall. We don’t want the fanfare and stress that accompanies a wedding.
Post # 8
I lost my dad when I was 16, and my mom when I was 12. My boyfriend lost his mom when he was 17. We are eloping so we don’t have to deal with the fact the main people in our life arent there. It sounds like eloping would be the best for you.
Post # 9
I’m biased here pro-elopement but let’s see…
You know eloping is right for you when in no particular order:
1. The thought of a conventional wedding makes you break out in hives, reach for Xanax or gives you nightmares.
2. You have a social phobia.
3. The thought of entering the church, reception venue or whatever with the spotlight on you causes serious angst.
4. You DONT want family or friends there for whatever reason.
5. You want to make it about you and DH only.
6. …uhhh I ran out of pseudo witty things to say help!
ok back to OP exclusively, only elope if that’s what you and your FI truly want. Sit down with him and ask him if it were only up to him who would he invite? Then do the same thought exercise with yourself. You two could have a very small wedding, an elopement, a City Hall wedding followed by a lunch/early dinner with your nearest and dearest, the options are limitless! Don’t elope because that gets you out of trouble with SOME family members, bc of societal rebelliousness, etc.
Here’s an article on City Hall weddings that made me rethink getting married IN City Hall although we still eloped:
Damn I can’t find it!
and here’s an article PRO City Hall weddings that captures the beauty of them: