Adoramapix v. Blurb (v. snapfish v. shutterfly)
more by CorgiTales
I'm in shoe lust and I want you to buy these...
HEY!!! feeling kind of blah today....
more in The Lounge
Lab Created Gems - Tacky Gifts?
slim small busted brides ENTER
more in Boards
Do i need pew decor?

Am I the world's biggest hermit?

posted 1 year ago in The Lounge
  • 1 Members Subscribed To Topic
  • poll: Rate your level of hermit-ness. It is a Wednesday night and you're invited out... you:
    Go! I'm game for anything any night of the week no matter how late I'll be out! : (7 votes)
    6 %
    Go! But only if I'll be home at a somewhat reasonable hour (i.e. before you'd go to bed anyways) : (28 votes)
    24 %
    Meh... maybe but only if it is close and doesn't take my whole night. : (54 votes)
    46 %
    Wednesday? Are you kidding me? Murder she wrote is on TV and my plastic-covered couch awaits... : (28 votes)
    24 %
  •  
    1.
    Member
    9,963 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    So I'm 26... but since I was about 17 I think I've really been 40 :) 

    I am just a total homebody. I have friends and I like them... but I don't feel the need to see them a ton and I mostly just like staying home with DH. Luckily he is the same!

    Tonight a friend of mine who is only in town for the week invited us to go to a trivia night. The bar is about 40 minutes from us (in traffic, maybe 30 min on the way home). We'll probably be there from around 7:30-10:30 or so. 

    My initial feeling was no. It is a work night and I don't really like to leave my house on work nights. If it was a 1-2 hour thing and it was 10 minutes away... ok yea maybe. But that far and that long? boo. DH though pointed out that we were invited out for last Friday by this friend and were unable to go, so we really should go. So-- we are. 

    And it's fine. I know that once I get there I'll have a good time, I always do. But whenever I"m invited to stuff like this, unless my DH kind of makes me go I just say no. 

    Just wondering if I'm the only hermit out there... or if hermit-itis is more common than I think. :) 

     

    p.s. I don't have social anxiety or anything like that. I just really like my "sitting at home in the quiet" time after work and I find it stressful to spend all of my free time in the evening with other people. 

     
    2.
    Hostess
    10,912 posts
    Sugar
    Beekeeper
    bakerella    September 11, 2010   Toronto, ON

    Ya I'm with you. I'm a total hermit. I'd so much rather host a dinner party and deal with the prep and clean up than go out. Is that terrible? LOL!

     
    3.
    Member
    693 posts
    Busy bee
    sit1010    June 18, 2011   Living in Raleigh, NC, Getting Married in Rochester, NY

    I'm actually the same way. I love it once I'm out but it's the getting out that's the issue.

    A) I hate spending money and some of my friends only plan events that involve gifts and/or very expensive nights out...dinner at a nice restaurant, club with a $20 cover and expensive drinks etc.

    B) Once I'm home it's just so comfy, especially on a work night when I haven't seen FI all day

    C) I'm exhausted by the time work is over and don't want to get ready to go out when I get home (I do not go to work ready to go out lol)

     
    4.
    Member
    8,906 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    Mrs.KMM    July 17, 2010   Atlanta, GA (wedding in Indianapolis, IN)

    I don't mind going out on weeknights after work but only if it is just an occasional thing and not a common occurance.  And I don't like being out later than my normal bedtime or I'm exhasted at work the rest of the week.

    I much prefer my "relax on the couch or with a book" nights at home. :)

     
    5.
    Member
    8,387 posts
    Bumble
    Beekeeper
    PitBulLover    August 21, 2010  

    Yup I feel the same way. I said I would go to something on a Wednesday but only if it was close and I knew I wasnt going to be out all night. I really enjoy staying at home and doing nothing with my husband! Or if we are going to go somewhere we might go to the movies or the mall which is like 2 minutes from our house. I am more likely to go out as it gets warmer but in the winter, forget about it.

     
    6.
    Member
    236 posts
    Helper bee
    tee22    September 27, 2012   Chicago

    My initial reaction to this was: are you kidding me? I want to have dinner, walk the dog, and relax when I get home! And then go to bed at a reasonable hour. (I'm 26.)

    But, it really does depend on the night. Some nights I love going out unexpectedly, and I feel up for anything, regardless of the day of the week. So I guess I have hermit days.

     
    6.
    Member
    2,742 posts
    Sugar bee
    ktisthatbees    May 1, 2011   Atlanta GA/Charleston SC

    pretty much everything everybody has already said, but your not alone. I would much rather stay at home on weeknights and relax with FI, it's not that I don't like my friends, but it's just such an effort to get ready, get in the car, drive 40 minutes somewhere, spend 3 hours and too much money, then drive home and be tired at work the next day.

     

     
    6.
    Member Icon
    Member
    1,546 posts
    Bumble bee
    MrsMcGyro    July 9, 2011   New York

    So with you! It has to really be worth it for me to go out on a weeknight. I even fight with FI over friday plans if they're too far away. I'm freakin tired after working all day and then going to the gym for an hour a day- save the big plans for Saturday!

     
    7.
    Member
    2,629 posts
    Sugar bee
    Bostongrl25    December 2017  

    My first thought was that Wednesday night is American Idol night on tv....so ya, you could say I am a hermit :)

    I'm the same though. I have a good time when I am out, but I much prefer to stay home with my SO and catch up on our days. My job requires me to be "on" all the time-talking to people and dealing with issues. By the end of the day I am just exhausted.

    By the way, I am 26 going on 45 :)

     
    8.
    Bee Icon
    Bee
    5,386 posts
    Bee Keeper
    mspony    September 2011  

    Your title made me laugh.  I like to stay home a lot too and I need some convincing to go out (especially if it is later).  I never regret going out, but it's easier to stay home.  

     
    9.
    Member
    4,075 posts
    Honey bee
    Amaryllis    July 2, 2011  

    I would go mostly just for the out of town friend whom I presume you don't see often. I am also a homebody but it is as much choice as lack of an alternative!

     
    10.
    Member
    581 posts
    Busy bee
    MissShork    July 30, 2011   Canada

    I'm so the same. Life's been really busy lately and I'd kill for a night in to watch TV. I often "force" myself to go out and be social. Cause I don't live with my FI, I spend most days driving to his house, which makes me a huge homebody when I get a chance to stay home. Honestly, seeing friends twice a week is lots for me.

     
    11.
    Member
    2,247 posts
    Buzzing bee
    MaraBeth    December 3, 2011   Dallas, TX

    I usually feel the same way on a weeknight...once I'm out, I almost always have fun, but I have to drag myself out the door. I don't get home from work until about 7 and I'm usually exhausted when I get back! We're 25 and 27 and weeknights are usually dedicated to relaxing/going to bed at a reasonable hour. Now that I write it out, it makes me feel like a hermit, too!

    @bakerella: I agree! We've started hosting some weekday dinners with friends, and I'd much rather play hostess and deal with the clean-up and preparation if it means I just have to sat put :)

     
    12.
    Member
    3,679 posts
    Sugar bee
    cyndistar3    September 3, 2011   Post Falls ID

    I have NO life... none at all. I don't even go anywhere on the weekends lol. I would much rather watch an awesome movie or bake than go out partying :)

     
    13.
    Member
    2,122 posts
    Buzzing bee
    Cash000    December 2, 2011   Canada

    I am exactly the same way. So is my fiance. We just don't like doing stuff very often with friends. We love our friends, just we love our own personal time much more. We always skip a few gatherings, and then go to one, mostly because we have to, so we keep our friendships, and sometimes, very rarely, because we want to! It's terrible, but at ;east we aren't alone, and others are like us too :)

     
    14.
    Member
    9,963 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    I'm glad I'm not alone here :) My friend was kind of mocking me for hemming and hawing about going out on a weeknight lol. 

    @Amaryllis: He's here every 5th week so we don't see him a TON but generally 1-2x/trip. If he was in from like, Germany or something, I'd be much more inclined to bend my normal rules haha.

     
    15.
    Hostess
    10,912 posts
    Sugar
    Beekeeper
    bakerella    September 11, 2010   Toronto, ON

    @cyndistar3: *high five* Me too!

    Every now and then DH sit back and look at it and are like "Ooooh wow. Maybe we should get a life..." but then realize we're happy being home, watching movies, making great meals. Whatever! It doesn't bother me one iota if other people think I'm boring! LOL!

     
    16.
    Member
    4,738 posts
    Honey bee
    NDBee    March 10, 2012  

    I'm a homebody as well. I grew up in a house with 4 kids, so there was always something to do at home rather than going out. Now that I'm 23 I act like I'm about 50 (Mr.ND even jokingly calls me 'Grandma' sometimes).

    I like cozy clothes, snuggled up on the couch nights, rather than having to get all done up and go spend $$. I like hosting people, too. It's just all the 'effort' involved in going out that I don't like :-) If it's laid back, tv and dinner night with friends, then I'm all for it.

     
    17.
    Member
    6,023 posts
    Bee Keeper
    jo.lee    September 10, 2011   Indianapolis

    Yep, you guys sound exactly like us. FI is more outgoing and wants to do things while I just want to stay at his apartment or my house.

     
    18.
    Member
    9,963 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    @NDBee: i totally agree. I used to live just 4 blocks from a good friend and we'd often go over to each others' houses after work and just chill, watch tv/movies, make dinner, whatever. That was always welcome to me and never stressful. It definitely is the: look nice, drive there, sit in a loud room, spend too much money, get home and deal with the crazy dog, etc that gets me.

     
    19.
    Hostess
    10,665 posts
    Sugar
    Beekeeper
    tksjewelry    June 25, 2011   Omaha

    We are the same way. I take a ton of convincing to get out of my house. I love my friends, it just that I have a ton of stuff to get done at my house and very little time to get it done in. I very much enjoy staying home with the FH. We cook, watch movies, and right now we are both trying to finish wedding projects.
    I made the mistake and stopped in at our local pub on monday (tues is my day off). I ended up closing the place and never got off my couch on tues because I was recovering from mon. I did nothing tues, and now I am still feeling guilty that I did nothing. Shoot, I was in so much agony that I never even turned on WB the whole day. I hate wasting a day like that.

     
    20.
    Member Icon
    Member
    47 posts
    Newbee
    MaesieLaBird    December 9, 2011   Manchester, NH

    As awful as it might sound, my going would depend on what I was invited to and with which friends!

     
    21.
    Hostess
    10,912 posts
    Sugar
    Beekeeper
    bakerella    September 11, 2010   Toronto, ON

    I have a good example of what a hermit I am. A couple weekends ago we had a bit of a date day planned. We were going to go down to the Tim Burton exhibit at the museum late in the afternoon, then hit the basketball game (we got free tickets from DH's brother), and then DH wanted to meet his friend for dinner after the game (9-ish). My immediate reaction was "Well we'll already have been out since 2 or 3, that's getting to be a long day................................". Seriously. I am 80 trapped in a 30 year old's body.

     
    22.
    Member
    4,738 posts
    Honey bee
    NDBee    March 10, 2012  

    @CorgiTales: "My true friends are those that will hang out with me with no makeup, no bra, and no plans" <-- My 'free time' motto :-) 

     
    22.
    Member
    4,821 posts
    Honey bee
    Jenn23    April 17, 2010   Philly suburbs

    I'm the same during the week. I like to relax at home. Much prefer going out on the weekends! Plus, our dog is home alone all day while we are at work (minus my husband's lunch hour at home) so I would hate to leave our dog at night. :(  So, we generally just go out on weekends!

     
    23.
    Member
    8,947 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    bells    June 26, 2011  

    I'm  homebody too.. especially on weekdays! I'm not into the whole going out all the time. I like to socialise on the weekends but thats it

     
    24.
    Member
    3,251 posts
    Sugar bee
    elliestan    October 15, 2011   OK | TX

    i'm the biggest hermit. FH lives in another state and i NEVER go out. ...EVER.

     
    25.
    Member
    9,963 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    @NDBee: best quote ever! so true :) 

     
    26.
    Member
    692 posts
    Busy bee
    missapis    September 29, 2012  

    FI and I are total hermits. I would work from home if I could lol. FI is usually the one who drags me out the door. I have a group of friends that goes out on week nights all of the time. All I want to do is go home after work, hit the gym and relax. My job is kind of stressful so I don't want to have to get all prettied up to go out after working 8 hours. Im usually ready to go to sleep at like, 9 lol. I'm only 23 but I rarely went out, even in college.

     
    27.
    Member
    476 posts
    Helper bee
    Masala    October 22, 2011   Ohio

    You are not alone! I totally, totally am a homebody. Don't get me wrong, I love to party, but on weekends only...okay, just Fridays...and just once a month. The exception is if someone wants to go to Surly Girl. My fave!

     
    28.
    Member
    1,147 posts
    Bumble bee
    retreadbride    July 31, 2011   bristol PA

    who needs to go out- we have wedding bee

     
    29.
    Member Icon
    Member
    16 posts
    Newbee
    nihilist    September 10, 2011  

    For a while I lived in a different city than my friends so I never went out.  It was the most relaxing time of my life!  I was able to sit at home, play videogames and drink wine alone and not worry about pissing off my friends.  

    FI and I will be moving out of state in 6 months, it's going to be hermit heaven! :D

     

     
    30.
    Member
    8,774 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    UpstateCait    October 7, 2011   Upstate, NY

    I'm with you. I'm pretty social when I need to be but I much prefer to just hang out at home in my jammies. FI and I rarely do anything during the week unless we're kind of forced to. I know couples who go straight from work to the bar and hang out until 9 or 10 at night. I'm eating my bowl of ice cream in bed by that time. Their lives exhaust me, lol.

     
    31.
    Member
    3,199 posts
    Sugar bee
    Oneeleven    April 7, 1992   Ontario, Canada, Getting married in the Mayan Riviera

    @CorgiTales:

    oh my gosh, totally the same here! Granted, I'm 40 now so it's about time I settled down and I up until I was thirty or so I worked in really social type jos (bars and nightclubs) so I was out all the time.

    But seriously? On a weeknight, while it might not be Murder She Wrote, it is a TV show and spooning FI on one side and my dog on the other and lights out by ten!

     
    32.
    Member
    1,542 posts
    Bumble bee
    MrsWrangler    October 2, 2010   Florida

    I'm a homebody on the inside - I get home, get comfortable and just want to stay in and snuggle with a movie. But we almost always go when/wherever the fun is! I love it once I get there, and I find that the more you say "no" the less people ask you to do, and then I feel left out when I do want to go out :(

     
    33.
    Member
    263 posts
    Helper bee
    kayely88    October 6, 2012  

    Glad I'm not the only hermit here. I don't mind going out some weeknights, but only to like Target or the grocery store or something. SO and I rarely go out on weeknights because we just like to make dinner together and watch some TV or a movie. So basically I'm 23 going on 45. But that's okay, I still love what I do every night.

     
    34.
    Member
    1,563 posts
    Bumble bee
    sdrury89    March 10, 2012   Houston, TX

    Oh, I'm right there with you guys. Before we moved to Houston I wasn't as bad because my best friend would convince me to go out most nights, but now that we've moved we're totally fine just sitting at home playing with the dogs and watching TV. So much more relaxing lol

     
    35.
    Member
    9,963 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    @MrsWrangler: lol i still struggle with this sometimes. I'll see pics on facebook of something and be like aw... i wasn't invited! but then I realize that the chances of me going to a bar on a monday night are 0 and they know that, so why would they ask? 

     
    36.
    Member Icon
    Member
    3,017 posts
    Sugar bee
    SweetRose2011    March 9, 2010  

    I actually do struggle with anxiety sometimes in public. I'm just socially awkward having been raised in such a sheltered home. It hasn't been until the last year or so that I've even been out and the last month that I've gone to my first bar party. I like going out but there are definitely nights I love to stay home with my man and just chill. But really, I don't have that much a life. AT ALL. 

     
    37.
    Member Icon
    Member
    1,601 posts
    Bumble bee
    JsDragonfly    December 29, 2009  

    @CorgiTales:  I am SUCH a hermit.  Like you, I have friends and I love them, but I love to just relax and be at home.  Even worse, I hate spontaneous "let's go do something" requests because I feel too bad to turn them down, but I have to plan things out.  lol

     

    Reply »

    You must log in to post.





    Visit our sister sites eHarmony
    Online Dating
    eHarmony Advice
    Dating Advice
    Project Wedding
    Wedding Songs
    JustMommies
    Pregnancy Calendar
    Copyright 2004-2012, Weddingbee.com
     

    Find your vendors on Weddingbee

    Real reviews from brides in your area!

    Favors by Weddingbee

    • Favors by season

    Shop Now ยป

    Find Registry Find Registry Find Registry

    More
    User Posts Today
    ellisrobertson 22
    MsPanda 14
    aduarte3201 14
    pengoala 11
    ShellVee 10
    londonchick 9
    londonpeach84 8
    KimKimmieKim 8
    ladyartichoke 6
    MrsBlueSeptember 6

    The Lounge

    User Posts Today
    ShellVee 8
    MsPanda 7
    ellisrobertson 5
    keepsmiling19 1
    Niqs 1
    countrygirl62312 1
    Rush1986 1
    janetsnakehole 1
    tnanog 1
    More