- 5 years ago
- Wedding: November 2011
Because the other thread got somewhat long, I thought it would be better to start another to give quick update. DH and I have had two long visits now. He is very sorry for how hea acted – I am able to distinguish between when he telling the truth, and telling me what I want to hear, and this time I have the gut feeling that he is truly sorry. He was crying, and asking me to please help him get the help he needs.
Some changes will be made. He is going to anger management, and will be going to more intense counseling. He is also asking me to make sure our pastor can meet with him. While I was there today, he called his parents, and told them that he would be up as planned for a visit next week, but would be staying with me, that moving home was not an option. I will be starting individual counseling, as well. I have taken your suggestions to heart, and have plans made for a get away bag, as well as financial security, should this happen again.
What could be our saving grace is that, once I get my finals submitted this week, I will be on break for six weeks. That is six non-stress weeks for us to reconcile our differences, get set with counseling, and get back to a good place!
As far as the future goes, we’re going to take that one step at a time. Right now, we need to focus on getting better and stable. As far as children go, we both believe fully that God has a plan, and we are part of it – if He chooses to bless us with children, then that is His will. However, I am fully aware of the consequences of having children in a violent household, and will take every precaution I can in the future. This anger is a surprise to everyone who knows DH – his best friend can’t believe it!
For now, we are going to work on what we can, and hope that the down time from my college schedule will help us in this process.
I wish to thank all the Bees who gave me support this weekend. Truthfully, I am friend-less IRL, and to be able to come somewhere to get support in a difficult situation, is heart warming to say the least. Thank you to all of you who gave suggestions, who commisserated with me, and who gave me hope. I realize that the decision we are making is not what some Bees mentioned, but this is what is right for us.