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it's not what a bride asked but what she did... she had a small reception that was a buffet, but was held in a nice beach house. unfortunately there were only two tables and no one else got a seat aside from her mom/husband's immediate family and her bridal party! Did not think of the guests in that situation, basically wanted us all to just keep standing with our drinks and plates carefully balanced?
It was a buffet style wedding at a restaurant and there were no seats and the food ran out!!!!
@Bamboo: Horrifying. Just horrifying! Wow! I can't believe you weren't even invited let alone that she then wanted you to be a server.
I've been pretty lucky. The worst thing that's ever been asked me from a bride is that I help set up her reception site - that's not the bad part - while listening to the same Shania Twain album on repeat all. day. long. By the third repetition I was ready to kick the stereo.
Right after the ceremony at my brother's friend's wedding, I was asked by the mother of the bride, whom I had never even met, if I could stick around the ceremony site to clean up decorations. Maybe it was rude of me, but I said that I couldn't abandon my date to do that - who happened to propose to me the next morning. 
My worst was last year at a cousin's wedding. This is a girl who tried to cut corners at every turn and ended up ticking off a lot of people. To begin with each person was given an envelope with their assigned job the morning of the wedding, she did not ask, she assumed. For myself it was taking care of the flower girls and ring bearer (18 month old, 2 year old, and 3 year old who had no idea who I was). I saw 2 minutes of the ceremony and then had to go spend the rest of the time in the nursery with the children. The only thank yous I got was from the guests not the bride. My second job was a server, along with my brother and 5 other first cousins. We had to serve everyone their food and cake before we were allowed to eat, even the restaurant that brought the food thought that was ridiculous, our food had to be microwaved. The we never received a thank you from the bridal party. This is only the tip of the iceberg with this wedding, to put it simply my ultra-conservative grandma told me I should get married in Vegas.
My story doesn't really include a task or favor, but it was definitely a what the...? kind of moment.
For a rehearsal dinner once at a destination wedding, we ended up at a really chic restaurant that the couple rented out. We were expecting a fun evening. When we walked in we were instantly handed 2 drink tickets & told if we lost them we were "SOL". Literally. I found it a little rude... they treated us like children!
Before we could eat, we were subjected to an hour long slideshow of the couple over the years. We literally had to sit and watch... any talking (or fun) was strictly frowned upon & ended up with death stares from the bride.
"Dinner" was then served... it was crudite, a disgusting roasted pepper that was cold stuffed with something that tasted similar to sand, a slice of bread and grapes. I'm not even exaggerating. It was awful. All I kept thinking was "I spent $1500 on this weekend and they serve me wonderbread?"
my co-worker asked me to work with her and her FI on the invites - considering she had four BM's i dont know why me but i love weddings and helping out so said yes.
we arranged a saturday to meet in our office (midway between our homes) and after getting there and setting up and showing me the sample she and her FI went out to get some morning tea for "us" and disappeared for the next 4hrs and returned only after i finished putting together all the invites. apparently the bride and groom got sidetracked and went off to do their wedding registries
pretty much the same thing happened with their programs and favours & she asked me to drive all the BM's to the church but my invite was for me only and my hubby wasnt allowed to come - but i love a wedding so what can i say
Wow. After reading the posts on this thread, I'm relieved to be the bride who has frustrated her bridesmaids by not giving them much to do.
I can't say anything like that has happend to me! My FSIL got married, and I helped make the bouquets and take pictures of my own will!
I did have someone freak out because I picked my wedding day to be her birthday-and it's not even someone I know well. It was my MOH's SIL! And somehow I am ruining her day? wth? lol.
This did not happen to me (thank goodness), but my friend was in a wedding and she was trying to bustle the bride's gown before they entered the reception. She was having trouble with it, when suddenly the bride lost it, grabbed her by the arm and shook her yelling 'Are you a retard?! Can else someone please do this?!' My friend was so mortified, and even worse, the bride made a joke about it later like 'She was just kidding' for beyond rude behavior.
Oh my god! "Are you a retard?" WHAT THE HECK!? I am picturing it in my head and laughing because that is just so wrong on so many levels.
I haven't been to a lot of weddings, but my FSIL was invited to one where she was expected to pay for her meal!!! Needless to say, she declined, but what is WRONG with people?!?!
This happened to my sister, but I thought it was kind of outrageous. A friend of ours from college was getting married (we're friends with the groom) and his fiancee asked my sister (whom she had met only a couple of times) to be her DOC! She said that because my sister was so organized, she wanted her to basically coordinate their wedding and do ALL of the WD tasks. My sister has pretty much no interest in wedding coordinating and was already upset to be the only one of our college friends who was not being included in the ceremony somehow. My sister politely declined the offer.
This same bride also just assumed that she could use our car to transport their cake. We found out about her plan when we saw "pick up cake-S & J's car" on her wedding day schedule. She never actually asked, but assumed it would be okay for a friend (whom we had never met) to drive our car 35 miles & back to pick up their cake. No thanks!
My FI's cousin who he's not especially close with selected his siblings to be in her wedding party. Feeling "guilty" she didn't ask FI to be part of the party, she asked him to videotape the entire ceremony and reception so he would feel included. He just laughed at her and said he didn't think servitude was the best way to include him in her wedding.
For me, the worst experience I had was when I was a BM for a wedding where the bride changed the date about 4 or 5 times. It was brutal because she would send STDs each time she changed it. She critized me for being unenthusiastic. I had half the mind to tell her my enthusiasm would be there when she stuck to a friggin' date.
Ug my FSIL decided on a whim to have a 'destination' wedding in Tahoe which is relatively close to her but really far for the rest of her family. She told us about it 2 weeks before her planned wedding date, which also happened to fall on a Monday or a Tuesday. When we informed her that we simply couldn't make it on that date, that we'd have to take too much time off of work (which we can't afford, we are saving our vaca time for our own honeymoon) she threw a total guilt trip at us saying well why can't we just drive down for the day (um, it's a 9 - 11 hour drive both ways???) and she's so disappointed in us that we couldn't go.....we felt bad as it was, but it was really confusing because seriously.....who decides to get married in 2 weeks and then gets mad when people can't make it?
THEN she decides to have a 'reception' at her house, asking everyone to bring food as a potluck reception, but also registered for expensive gifts. Um, usually, at a potluck reception, the bride and groom understand that the food IS the gift. Ugg.
I am seriously just waiting for this girl to show up at our wedding in her own wedding dress.
It didn't happen to me but my moh. This girl put everyone in the wedding but my moh told her long before she would put her in but shunned her. Then months before the wedding ask her if she would help plan the bachorette party, and come up with decorating ideas for the reception since none of bridesmaid were interested in doing it.
I have a story ... about my wedding (fortunately, not about me!).
We got married outside at a city park that has a small pond. We realized when we arrived for the rehearsal the evening before the wedding that Canadian geese had left small "deposits" all over the ceremony site.
It was kind of annoying, but it wasn't something I was going to worry myself about. Goose poop on the ground? Sorry, but I'm not stressing about that the day before my wedding. It could stay there for the wedding day, for all I cared. Apparently the groomsmen volunteered to clear away the goose poop and my mom told them she would bring them rubber gloves to wear.
Well, the wedding day rolled around and of course the groomsmen were too busy getting their pictures taken to pick up the goose poop. And two guy friends from out of town were supposed to be setting up the chairs, but my mom told them not to until the goose poop was picked up. So she gave them the gloves and told them to go at it!
Yes, my mother made my friends from out of town pick up goose poop on my wedding day!
I, of course, didnt' find out about any of this until after the fact. What could I do? I blushed and gave them many apologies and heartfelt thank yous. Oh, MOM! *faceplam*
Oh I forgot! I have another one about a bride!
A close friend of mine from college decided to scale down her wedding to bare bones and asked for help making up the invitations and announcements. The announcements looked exactly the same as the invites except they included an invitation to an at-home reception instead of the wedding itself.
Along with her bridesmaids, I spent hours laboring over those invitations. I was so excited when I finally got one in the mail! Then I opened it and discovered I was only invited to the reception, not the actual wedding.
*sigh*
Last year I went to a destination wedding (a good 3 hours away including an expensive ride on a ferry) that lasted 3 days b/c the bride "didn't want to be too tired"..um..ok..thanks for giving everyone a 2 night bill so you didn't have to be "too tired"...
And despite having the full 3 days to "relax"...she still managed to bark at all her bridesmaids and family throughout the whole weekend infront of her guests (and no - I wasn't a bridesmaid *PHEW*!)
My FSIL hired this god-awful make up artist and unfortunately we (the bridal party) all spent $25 each getting "clown" make up. So afterwards, when everyone realized how horrible it was (no one thought to speak up during the massacre of our faces), my FSIL asked me to re-do everyone's makeup since they had seen me change mine. I mean, I didn't mind all that much, but I really don't like to do other people's makeup just because I can do mine well, you know? (I'm the friend who has to do everyone's makeup and approve outfits before going out.) I ended up doing 5 girls' makeup (me and the bride included) and could barely get myself ready because of it. Had I been the MUA, I would have made $125! I also had to use all of my makeup to do it! MAC is not cheap!
My step brother got married a few weeks ago.The bride didn't actually do anything to offend anyone but there were several things that weren't too tactful... their friends were smoking weed at reception, it was outdoors but they were just toking at the tables! right in front of the grandparents... jeez... also the grooms family wasn't involved whatsover. They were allowed to do to do the rehersal dinner and thats it, they didn't ask for any opinions or anything. They didn't ask the grooms family to make a toast or anything either, it was just weird. Also, the DJ made announcement to tip the bar-tenders... umm hello, isn't that a given? who wasn't tipping? and the last thing that was rude, is they asked one of the guests (who was family not just a friend) to get off the dance floor... yes he dances a little weird but he wasn't bothering anyone and he was enjoying himself...
I have a few stories to share about my FSIL..I'm such a horrible person:) First, she told my FI and myself that we couldn't get engaged until after she got married, which was 6 months away. Then only half of the people she invited to the ceremony received invites to the reception. I may be taking this one too personally, since my parents (her future relatives) were one of the couples not invited to the reception, but in my opinion, if you get invited to the ceremony, you should be invited to the reception..especially since my dad was the officiant for the ceremony and spent months prior to the ceremony working with them! Then toward the end of the reception, she and her husband began opening the cards that they'd received and started tallying the money. I think my jaw hit the floor - thankfully at that point most non-family members had left.
I may be reading all these wrong, but is a wedding for the bride and groom or for the guests??? Do we throw a wedding to cater to our guests at their every need and make sure THEY are cozy and happy? Or do we have a wedding to share our day of getting married with friends and family?
They began tallying the money at the reception? Wow, how tacky!!!! I would have left right then if I was a guest!
@madallia - I think you're reading into it too much. We're just sharing some outrageous stories about what some brides asked to do on the wedding day. The wedding day is absolutely about the bride and groom, but when a bride finds a seat for all guests except for the bridal party, or some guests are asked to pick up goose poop, it makes for a funny story!
A friend of mine was in a wedding where the bride demanded that all of her bridesmaids have a dress code for the bachelorette party. They were to all wear some sort of black, but not to be as dressed up as the bride. They all had to wear their hair down, dish out $150 for a limo and $300 for a hotel room for the night. My friend already had concert tickets for that night, and the bride gave her a total guilt trip and made her sell her tickets! Crazy!
@madallia: I think every bride has different priorities, but at our wedding we want our guests to have fun and not feel offended!
True! Very true. Guests should have a good time. A few ppl have asked me to accomidate them, fly them in, or make special expensive arangements for them... thats probably where im coming from
Wow, I dont' have any horror stories, but some of these are too funny!
@ eloping: You went back and helped with her favors and programs after they way they treated you? Oh man, you have way more patience and grace that I do! :P
@madallia: I agree, a wedding is about the bride and groom however, it does not give the bride (or groom) reason to be a bitch. Thats the problem, so many brides get all high and mighty and expect everyone to bow down to them because they are bride for a day. Being a bride does not give them reason to be disrespectful and inconsiderate to others. Respect should be a 24/7 thing, not just when it suits you.
@ Leafy.... what can i say.. i love a wedding! im currently in the midst of organizing her office baby shower - going way over the top as per usual... im easily excitable about this stuff
@ eloping: I would have said something to her, otherwise she doesn't know she did anything wrong- she won't change if she doesn't know she was rude. You obviously have the patience of a saint. :)
I need you in my life, I don't have people who get excited about this stuff. :P
My FBIL's wedding was planned (and funded) entirely by my FMIL. The bride claimed to be "clueless" and didn't want to help at all but was quick to complain when she learned she didn't like something. Since the bride would not participate, I was asked to step in and help out with everything from making centerpieces, stuffing envelopes, printing labels, going from store to store to pick up supplies, sitting in with FMIL to talk to the DJ about their music selections and for the rehearsal, I had to stand in as one of the GROOMSMEN and then later relay all the details to the actual groomsmen and on the day of, I went around and placed every single place card at every single seat, set up the centerpieces, set up the gift table and went back and forth in 5 inch high heels on rocky concrete to get supplies from the car.
To make matters worse, my FI was in the wedding party so I was stuck at the "single" table that wasn't even near anyone I knew at an adjacent table. I had to sit and watch the two bridesmaids on either side of my FI chat him up all through dinner while I sat next to the DJ's speaker and the cake. When they went to cut the cake, I was asked to move from my table. The bride/groom had all these stupid little events that required the bridal parties participation the whole time so I never once got to be with my FI.
Also, the photographer was in my face the whole night making me pose for pictures and then a week later when we were given the cd of pictures from the bride/groom to take our pick of wedding photos, NONE of the pictures that the photographer took of me were there! The bride/groom deleted them. I spent all my time helping them have a good wedding and we don't even like each other, yet I don't even have a picture of myself to remember the occasion that I didn't even recieve a thank you for!
Instead of being generous and helping them, I could have been working on my own wedding planning and that is the thanks I get....
Here's some events from my FI's cousin's wedding (he's the groom).
Invitations came out, date was on a Friday (ok not too bad, Sats are normally better for most folk though, but hey they wanted to save money)
The wedding was in a different county (ie destination wedding) so everyone had to travel and stay over in a hotel for two nights to accommodate this (ok fair enough, that's where they wanted it)
Oh and guests had to pay for the coach which took us from the ceremony to the reception (reception being held in another county from the ceremony, so that's three counties so far people)
The ceremony was held in a castle, which as beautiful as it was, had winding keep stairs that led to the ceremony room, in which guests had to ferry the groom's elderly Grandmother (a wheelchair user) up and down (i.e. no disabled access)
When the photographs were being taken with all the guests, the Bride was asked to move slightly so she was more central to the picture, to which she demanded that her guests move around her.
Her Mother and Father in law were quite unwell on the day and didn’t know if they would make the reception. She demanded they attend saying "I'm not having two empty seats at my head table".
The bride left her train down all day and insisted on walking through the dance floor at every given opportunity, so towards the end of the evening (once everyone had had a few drinks) her train was obviously being stood on, which resulted in her screaming (and I mean screaming) at a few of her guests that they should watch where they're going.
At very end of the evening she demanded that all her guests stand in a circle while she and her new husband went round everyone to say goodbye (even although she was getting on the same coach as us all and staying in the same hotel), and when anyone moved slightly from the circle they were told to "GET BACK".
Bridezilla.....................................................................................................
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Okay, so I'm trying really hard to be a nice, accomodating bride for the most part, but sometimes it takes a lot to restrain myself when talking wedding with others. Like when my fiance's cousin and his wife asked as (jokingly but not) if we would consider moving the date because her brother is getting married that day as well. Um...no. Like when his sister told me that it was really good I didn't pick the week after because a classmate of hers is getting married that weekend (I'm sorry, and thats a difficult choice to make how).
BUT for as many rude guests, there are definitely some...demanding brides!
So my question is, what favor/demand did a bride ask that left you scratching your head or absolutely bewildered?
I'll start. My future SIL had a destination wedding (which I couldn't attend as it was the weekend before I graduated) and then a big reception at home a few months later. It was a casual, but large reception and they needed people to serve the buffet dinner (no service with catered food for some reason?). So fsil asked my fiance (then boyfriend) if he would ask our friends if they would be servers. And then she asked if I would! YES you read correctly. My fiance was so upset. Apparently as her brother's girlfriend of 2.5 years I was not guestworthy for a 300+ person reception, but I would do fine as the hired help! When he told her hell no, that he didn't think it was nice at all to ask that of me, SHE was miffed. So the day of the reception I asked a few times (during set up) what she needed help with yet and she said don't worry you don't have to do anything. SNARKY. I can light candles and set up some chairs, but don't you think its a bit to ask that. Anyway, so our poor friends worked nonstop for 3-4 hours setting up, serving food, clearing tables on a HOT and very humid August day and I'm still not even sure she remembered to pay them.
So what's your story?