Post # 1
This story just seems to crazy not to be shared, and it’s all true. So I am living abroad in Southeran Asia and have to shop for my dress here because time-wise it just makes the most sense. So I grab a local friend to translate, she makes some reservations and we head to the stores.
I prepared myself to not fit into most of the dresses in the store. I understand that my size 12 American body isn’t the typical for most of the women here. What I didn’t realize is that Asia is different in that they like to “help” you put on the dress. By help they stand there, watch you take off your clothes, and then help you get into the dress. When the woman saw my tattoos I thought she was going to faint.
You know that little hip wiggle we all do that so the dress slides over our bottoms? Yeah, she was helping me by pushing it in cheek by cheek haha. Anyways so the first two stores went okay (besides that I didn’t find any I was too wild about) but the third store was the kicker.
Not only did I not fit into most of the dresses (and was told I should think about losing weight before my husband sees) one of the dresses WOULD NOT FIT. Okay, not big deal right? The saleswoman puts in ample amounts of effort to fit my butt into it, becomes exhausted, and leaves the dressing room. I hear her talking to her coworkers (and other store people) and peek my head out. She was speaking another language (which I’m not fluent in) but I could see her hand motions. She was SLAPPING her butt and making the “giant” hands around the outside of it–obviously talking about how I didnt’ fit into the dress. Tramatizing? Maybe a bit.
So I changed back into my clothes and decided to end the first official wedding dress shopping day shortly after. Downstairs I was showing them the design of hte dress I want (its a trumpet style) to which the woman (a different worker–same store) told me that my butt would jsut be too big–and that the dress style would accentuate it and I should consider getting a different style that would cover it up. Mind you this was all translated from their language into my language by the friend who came along with me.
I cried a bit to the FI but am trying to keep my head high. He told me he loves my curves which helped. I recognize cultures are all different, and some don’t appreciate things like Sir Mixalot does. 🙂
I wanted the share the story though, because it’s just incredibly crazy!! Oh, and I bought the dress (trumpet style!!!) off line (a size up) and will jsut have it altered to fit. It seemed easier than braving the stores again.
Post # 3
Wow! I’m so sorry to hear you had such a terrible experience! That is just awful customer service. I’m so glad to hear that you bought your dress online, rather than from a store whose employees had said such incredibly insulting things to you. And good for you for sticking with the style you want and not getting what everyone else thinks you “should” wear because of your body! I’m sure you are a beautiful woman, and you should wear what you want on your wedding day!
Post # 4
I’m so sorry that you had to deal with that. I think it really is just a culture thing though- I had a friend who was from Taiwan, and she was TINY. When she went home to visit- her FAMILY told her she needed to lose weight because she was now the “Fat cousin”. Don’t take it personally (easier said than done, I konw)- and you know what- I have a bit of Awesome in the Trunk- and I have a fit and flare dress- I’m sure that your FI will love it as much as I know mine will!
Post # 5
When I got married, I was a size 12 (I’ve lost a whole dress size since whoohoo!), and I wore a fit & flare or trumpet. I don’t think you need to worry about the size of your butt. A dress that is fitted well will make it look fantastic!
Post # 6
Yea I had a man from immigrant say to me once in my jewelry store, “all you american womens are so big you wrists are so big and manly” mind you I am a size 2 and I have a tiny wrist for an american…..but then I said “well atleast are men are big too”….oops it slipped!!!!!!!!!! haha
Post # 7
Sorry, I couldn’t imagine finding a wedding dress in Asia, everything there is so tiny. In Japan and Korea I couldn’t fit into anything! I did find a great bargin on a pair of American Egle shorts that were on a discount rack prob because they were way too big for anyone there. Hope you have better luck and find a great dress.
Post # 8
@themiddlelittle: Ooh no sorry you had this experiene whilst dress shopping. I’ve got a fit and flare dress and I’m a US size 10 and the dress highlights my bum, to which I know FI will love. When I looked in the mirror, I thought hey you’ve got a great ass.
Post # 9
Oh my gawd…that is some story! (you told it so well by the way)
I am terribly sorry that you had that trauma and I don’t blame you for being upset! Too bad you couldn’t have had your friend tell those ladies that their comments were rude and hurtful!
Glad you found an alternative way of getting the dress you wanted.
Post # 10
Aww I am sorry, I have been to south east asia a bunch of times, and its not great for your self esteem 🙂
I have a friend who told me the reason she stays so thin is because if she puts on even 2 kilos she goes back home and they all say “oh you got so fat!” – its not considered rude to be straight up about peoples weight over there!
I am a size 4 and I feel massive whenever I am over there. They are all so petite!
Post # 11
boy does this bring back memories of trying on jeans in China x_x
Post # 12
Wow.. that’s very interesting! Helping you in cheek b cheek… call you butt “too big”. Wow! If it makes you feel any better, I have a pretty large butt myself. I mean, it’s HUGE! I love it and my FI loves it. So there was no question about showing it off with a trumpet style dress (more dropped waist, but still accentuates my butt). My mom stares at me in it and said, “Oh, wow that does accentuate your butt… you sure you want to do this?” Yes! 🙂
Post # 13
Sorry that happened to you. Actually similar stuff happens here in the States too. In one salon I went to the owner yelled across the entire store that I must’ve “paid good money for those nice perky boobs”. In another store the sales manager scolded me like a kid, “we can’t change the dress to fit you, if you’re short you’re short!” . Nothing like having your body scrutinized and passed judgement on by someone who’s supposed to be helping you out.