Post # 1
My other half and I are planning our elopement for the end of June while we are staying at a cottage about an hour from home. Very, very simple and very private. Not dressing up much (just a pretty blue dress) and no ring-wearing until after.
I’m VERY close with my mom and sister (and the rest of my family) he’s not really close to his. He’s been married before (divorce was official in January) and I’ve never been.
BUT I hate crowds, hate being the centre of attention (I couldn’t even say thank you in front of my family at my 30th surprise birthday party) and the elopement was my idea. I’m starting to worry about hurting my mom and sister’s feelings, although I know that after, they’ll understand why I’ve done it.
Do I HAVE to send announcements? I would rather not but how rude is it to just put it on facebook with a few personal visits and phone calls?
Post # 3
@Miss-Petunia: If I were you I would tell your family about a week before you go. They should understand your reasons and they’ll be happy that you told them before. As for the announcements I think that you know your people best. If it was my extended family they would be upset about a facebook status change without an anouncement. But I know a couple who did the facebook thing and they got rave reviews. Why do you not want to send an announcement? It may make it feel more real afterwards (not that it isn’t already but it’ll add to it) I think that as long as you call/visit everyone close to you you’re fine, but if it was me, I’d send an announcement.
Post # 4
My sister cannot keep a secret at all. LOL And she will be working that day (Saturday) and if I told her, she’d book the day off and tell people. My aunt (who is not my favourite person in the world) will be living with my mom by then and if my mom goes, then she will want to go (and will most liley tell her (grown) children). I don’t want to feel obligated to have that aunt and her children there as I am closer with my other aunts, uncles and cousins and if I have one, I should have them all. And is exactly what I’m trying not to do.
He’s not close with his parents (sees them about every other month) and get the feeling that I’m not their most favourite person in the world. If I invited my family, I’d have to invite his.
I would call my aunts, uncles, cousins and one or two close friends when we got back (he can call his).
One of the reason’s I don’t want to send announcements is I hate being in pictures, the cost and I would need the addresses of everyone, who would then be curious about why I wanted the announcements.
Post # 5
And arent’ elopements supposed to be a secret anyway? 😀
Post # 6
Sounds like you’ve answered your own question then. You don’t want to send announcements or tell anyone beforehand, so don’t! I suggested this blog post to PacificGirl a while ago:
It may help you with telling people afterwards. But just call people afterwards and then after you’ve done that then change your facebook status.
Post # 7
@Miss-Petunia: You could just send out some announcements that day/weekend. What we are doing is sending our elopement announcements to what was going to be our guest list that morning before we leave home (we’re getting married that evening) so a lot of our guests will receive the announcements the next day or Monday.
I would go ahead and do that, versus just a Facebook announcement. Make the important people feel important by sending them some sort of personalized thing. It’ll help any feelings from loved ones of being left out.
I did tell my BFF who was going to be flying from Germany so she didn’t book her flight, but that’s the only person who knows.
This is what I designed for FI and I to send. I’ll print them out here in a few weeks on some heavy cardstock so it’s like a postcard.
Edit: And that link that Allie provided is amazing! I have it on my bookmarks 🙂