- 7 years ago
- Wedding: May 2011
I’m a little annoyed with some comments my mother has been making and want to vent!! I’m not going to say anything to her b/c I realize I might be overreacting.
Anyway, my mom lives in a different state and isn’t very into weddings. She asks me how it is going sometimes, but has never offered any advice or help or anything.
My parents aren’t contributing financially, but in the beginning of summer my mom said she wanted to buy or help buy my dress, which was really nice. We went dress shopping once at the end of July and I didn’t find the dress.
My mom wanted me to get a chiffon dressb that I tried on in the Maggie Destinations line. I liked it, but it wasn’t “it” and I felt like it would be better for a beach wedding or something more causal.
Anyway, she vetoed every other dress I tried on and said the chiffon was the most flattering b/c it hides my problem areas. (FWIW I am 5’5″ and weigh 120). She also seemed really upset that I would wear a size 8 in a wedding dress. I tried to explain to her that wedding dresses run differently, but she kept saying that someone in New York or a big city would understand how to fit me. (what??) Then she went on and on about how my cousin would definitely be a size 0 in these wedding dresses b/c she is so small, etc.
I know my mom isn’t the type to cry when she sees her daughter in a wedding dress (I’m not one to cry about this either), but she never even smiled when I was trying on these things. She gave her approval to the chiffon dress, but she did it in a way that you would think she was a Project Runway judge or something. It made me really uncomfortable.
Anyway, I went with my FMIL a few weeks later and found my dress. My mom saw a pic and said it was nice, but since then said that she “hopes the top isn’t like that when I get it.” Yesterday, she said that when the dress comes in and I try it on to really be sure that I like it b/c I could just return it. What? How passive-aggressive is that? Keep it to yourself, I put down a deposit already. I told her that it is called a non-refundable deposit for a reason. Then she started talking about Randy from SYTTD and that he said they will work with you to get you a dress you like if you decide you don’t like the one you bought. BTW I didn’t get my dress at Kleinfeld, and I doubt a dress shop would give you back a non-refundable deposit for no reason.
There’s been other things with the dress, and the wedding in general too. She doesn’t want to be involved, but wants to judge everything. I feel like I am going to feel self-conscious in my dress on my wedding day b/c of my mother. I feel like she is going to scrutinize everything about the way I look. Just had to vent!! Sorry for the book!