Post # 1
I don’t mean this post to bash anyone who has started their own “In Home Sales” business (i.e. Pampered Chef, Stella and Dot, Mary Kay…etc). They are excellent ways to earn extra income and they have a lot of benefits which I completely respect.
But I have a friend who started one of these business and has been doing well. I went to one of her parties and it was fun, but I didn’t buy anything because I didn’t need anything. Now, everytime I talk to her, she keeps pushing me to have a party, or introduce her to my co-workers so they can host parties, or looking through her new catalogue to see if there’s anything I need…etc. I have lunch with her about 1/month, and it’s all she talks about. I feel like she turns our lunches into sales calls.
I started off politely declining her invitations to parties she’s holding, and making excuses for why I can’t buy anything that month…etc. I finally said something to her along the lines of “I don’t really buy stuff from catalogues. If I need something, it’s always last minute and I usually just run out and get it at the store.” This made her even more determined to “convert me”.
What do I do?? I don’t want to loose her friendship, but she’s driving me INSANE!!
Post # 3
BE more direct, but nicely.
Tell her, “Jane, I am really excited for you and your business, but I feel like all we talk about is your business when we catch up. I promise I will let you know when or if I need something, but can we talk about something else.”
Also, I would buy something just because. This way she cant “blame” you for not supporting her. Maybe a mascara or something that you know you replace more often and will need eventually.
I had a friend like this and I bought a few items for me an a present for my mom. It really helped “keep her off my back” because she new I would come to her if I needed something.
Post # 4
I don’t know what you should do, but you have my sympathy. I have a friend who dropped out of college to do something like this, and I guess they are doing ok, but hanging out with him is no longer fun because it is always a sales pitch. I just stopped hanging out with him very much.
Post # 5
wow. you are nicer than i would be. i HATE this business model and quite honestly resent anyone who wants me to participate in their parties. I take a flat-line refusal at this point. I don’t go to those parties. I don’t host those parties. I don’t want to buy anything. Period. No I won’t look. No I won’t listen. Nope!
Post # 6
My FSIL does the same. She goes through phases and she’ll sell stuff for a company, and do really well for awhile, but that’s the thing… you pretty soon run out of people to sell to, because your friends/family are only going to buy so much of the same stuff. So to continue making money, you have to get THEM to host parties with you as the hostess, then hope some of the guests will use you as well, or use you as a referral to start selling themselves. So once you exhaust all your immediate resources, you kind of have to stop for awhile and then maybe start with ANOTHER kind of at-home product. My FSIL started the business she’s doing about… I guess 7 or 8 months ago, and I would have loved to have helped support her in it, but the stuff she sells is NOT my style at all- I would never wear it, and it’s not cheap either! I think she thought especially with my wedding I’d have a reason to buy a ton of stuff from her, but I didn’t and it made things a little uncomfortable for awhile because she’d do the whole sales pitch and I’d be like…” Okay, maybe!”
I have no idea how to fix it with your friend though, because most people with tact and a sense of self-awareness will get the point after you don’t buy something for awhile and eventually they’ll stop giving you the hard sell. She needs to back off!
Post # 7
Might I suggest you try clear communication?
” I am so happy you have found something you love to do and to be able to work from home. I value our friendship. I want to keep enjoying each other’s company as we have in the past.I need you to not ask me to have a party, check the catalogue, try new samples etc. I will let you know when and if I need information.”
Post # 8
@CorgiTales:My biggest complaint is that everything in her catalogue is about 50% more expensive than if I bought it at the store. I don’t really understand why anyone would purchase from this particular catalogue except for the “camaraderie” of shopping when you’re drinking/hanging with girlfriends. I’m way too cheap to engage in that kind of group-think….
Post # 9
I feel bad for you! I had a friend like this, she would instead of actually sell the stuff, host all kinds of parties for different things. I got tired of being invited all the time to the different parties. I think one of the reasons why she stopped talking to be because I rather blunt on her latest invite for Norex stuff. I have no interest in over priced cleaning rags/supplies. I told her so, after that she kinda got flakey on me and we are no longer friends.
Post # 10
You have to be extremely blunt and to the point. My SIL was extremely motivated when she started her at home sales job and was all over my case to sign on/host a party. When I wasn’t straightforth, she constantly tried to sign me up. When I told her, “No, I am in no way interested,” she left me alone. It took persistence of saying no several times though. lol
Post # 11
You say she’s been doing well with her business, right? I wouldn’t feel badly about not wanting to be bullied into buying things at all. I would honestly tell her, “I feel like you’ve stopped considering me a friend and instead see me as a potential customer. I respect your business and am happy to hear about your successes, but I am not the type of person who enjoys buying from these types of parties/catalogues so I would really appreciate it if you stopped pushing.” If she’s not able to respect those wishes then it doesn’t seem like her desires for your relationship go any further than something to benefit her business.
Post # 12
I would flat out tell her, “I’m glad you’re doing so well and I value our friendship, but I would like you to remember that I’m your friend and not a business opportunity. I am happy to spend time with you when it’s not business-related, but please understand I am not interested in discussing product parties, expanding your network, or becoming one of your customers.”
If this was me and she still couldn’t draw the line, as much as I hate to say it, I wouldn’t be able to continue with the friendship.
Post # 13
My entire Facebook page is slammed with crap from at home sales (and I’m not talking about the legitimate kind as mentioned by the OP). It started with one friend and then she conviced other friends to jump on board thus doubling the spam. I know mark it all as just that, spam and it is deleted.
I have been more than blunt with them both telling them out right their product (body wraps and other weight loss items) are crap and don’t work. I mean neither one of them are any skinnier despite their unlimited supply.
Despite being blunt and honest they continue to bombard me with their stuff and at this point I just ignore them, there isn’t much else I can do without hurting the friendship.
Post # 14
i hate those ponzi schemes! lol
Post # 15
No joke, this is just a conversation we had over BBM when I asked if we were still on for lunch this week:
Her: Plan B is in full effect
Me: What’s Plan B?
Her: To make a go at my home business and eventually quit my job. It’ll be years, but I can do it if I stick to it.
Me: That’s great!
Her: Yep, that’s my dream. So have a party so I can meet your friends, recruit them and quit my job. Easy as that.
UGH! Lunch this week is going to be fun. I’m definitely going to take all of your advice and put a hard stop to this.
Post # 16
@CorgiTales: totally agree – i have to say that i do judge people who buy into these schemes (maybe this should go in the “are you a snob” thread?), because to me they are so blatantly unsustainable. I know that everyone has a friend of a friend who made it big with a scheme like this, but really, that person was successful on the backs of other people doing his or her bidding and probably lost friends along the way.
To the OP, I think you have to put your foot down with her and set limits on what you talk about when you get together. If she strays back towards her business, pull her back in line and remind her that you don’t want to have her pitch again. If you keep reminding her, hopefully she’ll eventually stop altogether.