- 5 years ago
- Wedding: April 2013
I feel like I’m always whining, but I’m really annoyed…
FI has a best friend (we’ll call him B and he’s almost 30) who lives about an hour away from us and frequently visits because his girlfriend lives close by. Well, he’ll stay with us for a week or two at a time (B and his girlfriend have a relatively new relationship and, since she has kids, she thinks it’s better he doesn’t spend the night at her house, as she’s trying to set a good example). Typically, I don’t mind, but B’s been getting on my nerves lately.
Background: I have a few health issues (nothing life-threatening), so I often don’t feel well. FI is very understanding and respectful of this – like he was last night at a Christmas party we went to. (There will be more on this later).
It was hosted by a friend/co-worker who lives down the street from us. Even though she said we weren’t having dinner until 7 (we actually ended up eating closer to 8 because of the turkey taking longer than expected), I went over at 5:15 to help her finish cooking (I was feeling fine).
Well, B had asked if he could join us at the Christmas party since his girlfriend had previous obligations. (It was either that or him sit at our house by himself, which I wished I would have had him do). So, I asked my friend and she said he could, though she had never met him before. (I felt bad for bringing extra people and apologized for being rude, but she insisted that it was fine).
First of all, he made FI late (I was already there) by a half an hour because he decided he needed to take a shower and change as they were walking out the door (but he often does this when we go places). And when they got there, B was being loud and obnoxious as usual. My friend politely asked him to not speak so loudly, since she lives in an apartment building.
My friend had asked everyone to bring a bottle of wine to share and B was drunk by 9, despite having not contributed anything to the party. (He always does this). We were having a great time, but around 11:30 I started to not feel well, so I discreetly told FI, who said we could go home. So, I announced we were leaving and went around hugging everyone and saying good bye. Then, B said “I don’t have to go with you. I’m going to stay for a bit and walk home.” To which I replied, “No, you’re coming with us.” Again, he said he’d just walk. Mind you, it was raining really hard, but I just wanted to get home, so I sort of just left it at that, not in the mood to argue and FI wasn’t stepping in. (Though I felt really bad, my friend is easy-going and we were the first people to leave).
So, FI and I got home and I went straight up to bed while FI said he was going to stay up and finish a movie he had started earlier that day. Well, I couldn’t really sleep, so I woke up at 4AM and checked my Facebook on my Kindle for something to do. My friend had sent me a message at 1AM to ‘come and get B.’ At that point (1AM), both FI and I were asleep, though FI fell asleep on the couch while watching the movie and B woke him up when he got home at 2AM. (He used the front door, which leads right into the living room). Then, he kept FI up because he decided to watch TV in our living room until 3AM.
Am I wrong to be annoyed that he invited himself to stay at a party until 2AM (hosted by a person he just met) when FI and I left at 11:30? He is ALWAYS doing stuff like this – it’s like he is so clueless about manners. I mean, when he got to the party he immediately went to my friend’s fridge and started taking wine and other beverages out… I would never go through someone’s frige when I just met them.
Then, B never cleans up after himself. I do as much as I can cleaning-wise during the day when I’m feeling well enough, but he leaves beer bottles, food wrappers, etc. everywhere. FI at least picks up after himself, though he doesn’t dust, wipe the counters down, and stuff like that.
And he always makes comments that you should keep to yourself… Tthere are a few stains on the carpet from a previous tenant that I’ve failed to get out, but I vacuum regularly and try to keep up with the house-work. He made the comment that my carpet ‘is dirty.’ Okay… This really pissed me off because I can only do so much and my house is cleaner than most people I know keep their houses (though I don’t have kids or anything and I’m not judging anyone). Also, he is constantly making comments about what we should change about the wedding.
I’m seriously ready to scream. He is so immature that it’s almost sickening. FI doesn’t see it, though, because they always have a great time re-living the college days, but I feel like at some point you just need to grow up… I don’t consider myself a “stick in the mud” at all, but I just like having fun while being considerate of others. However, you better not insult my house-keeping when I can barely move around for extended periods of time. /:
Am I wrong to be so irritated?