(Closed) Annoying Situation, Don't Know What To Do (long)

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
9627 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@brendaray2009:  ((HUG))  You’re not being irrational.  I wouldn’t like it either.  But don’t jump to any conclusions because your Mom is probably right and this will blow over when your Fiance moves away from the facility.  It’s possible this friend of his does want to be with him but he obviously does not want to be with her.  He loves you and wants to marry you, right?

However, you could ask him to put a stop to her inappropriate texting at all hours of the night or when the two of you are together, because that is disrespectful of your relationship, on her part.  She may not mean to be intrusive, though, especially if she has some mental issues going on, it’s possible she doesn’t have good social skills.

Probably the best thing he can do to minimize her contacting him so much is to ignore her and not make too big a deal of it.

If you trust him, then trust him to handle this as well. 

Post # 5
1293 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

@brendaray2009:  Was he giving her his card for business networking? It doesn’t sound like she’s using it that way. Maybe she just wants a friend. Either way, I wouldn’t like it. You said it’s an independent living building, but generally each resident is assigned a case worker, yes? Could this issue be brough to the case worker’s attention?

I see that you aren’t allowed to talk to her (which seems a bit silly if they are preparing residents for the real world that doesn’t operate in a bubble) but maybe it can be handled that way. Of course I wouldn’t advocate yelling at her or saying mean things, but there’s nothing wrong with a conversation between adults about a problem.

Post # 6
927 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I agree with your mom. People with issues like that can get extremely clingy even to the point of stalkerish behavior. I might ask your Fiance to speak to her again about it, but otherwise leave it alone. If she’s unstable she could hurt you or herself.

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