Post # 1
Going Anon for this. My live in SO has been sketch since, well forever. I moved out of state to be with him and have seen some signs of some kind of behavior but no concrete proof. What I’ve seen have been some times when he has left his facebook open, I saw a message from some girl saying “When are we going to get happy hour” and he replied “anytime!”.
One time a few months ago, he went out and didn’t answer my calls or texts all night and didn’t come home until the next morning. He had some lame excuse for where he stayed, then he became friends with this girl on FB and was getting texts from her. More explanations, more excuses. I can’t prove anything so I can’t do anything about it.
He never has put any photos or check ins of the two of us on FB, and he frequently deletes them when I do. Says that he doesn’t like check ins. We were out of town and he was checking himself in, but not including me. Says that there is something wrong with his FB, he can’t include people in check ins.
Went out with a friend last weekend, he checked the two of them in a few places.
Fast forward to last night – he deleted every trace of me from his FB, every photo I have tagged him in, every check in. Gone. Said he did it because he justapplied for the Bar and they will be checking up on him, so he made everything super private. He doesn’t know this, but I know his FB password. I get on it today to see what the deal is. There is a girl who he used to date. He went to a football game Saturday, she must’ve been there too, I can’t see what he initially said to her but I can see her response saying “Hey sorry, I just got this. Hope you had fun at the game, sure was perfect weather for it!”
WTF do I do now??
Post # 3
“My live in SO has been sketch since, well forever.”
This sentence alone says volumes about him. You can do better.
Post # 4
WTF do you do now? Forget about him.
ETA: You don’t untag or delete your girlfriends pictures when you are trying to get a job.
Post # 5
Ok, well none of that behaviour proves he is cheating. The message from the girl does not show anything to me about cheating?
I think that your gut tells you hes cheating. And you did say hes always been “sketch”.
And Facebook really shouldnt have any indication about where your relationship is going. My FI doesnt have any relationship status at all.
But anyway as I was saying, it sounds to me that you are looking for things. Doesnt sound like you trust him at all. Maybe you should talk about it or end it? Those would be the only options right
Post # 6
It sounds like he’s putting you in second place. You deserve much better than that!!
Post # 7
Why are you still with this guy? If I even had the slightest idea my SO was messing around, BUH-BYE NOW!
Post # 8
@kjo: It’s not Facebook itself, it’s that he is going out of his way to make himself appear single.
You deserve a guy who is proud to show you off, not pretending you don’t exist.
Post # 9
um leave. you don’t need concrete proof. You have that proof, you just can’t see it since you’re in the midst of it all. Trust me you’ll be able to see it all much clearer when you’re on the outside again looking in.
he sounds like my ex, right down to the lawyer part.
Post # 10
For me the biggest problem isn’t the potential cheating its that he doesn’t seem proud to be with you. I wouldn’t waste my time with someone who was constantly trying to hide my existence. If he wants the single life let him have it.
Post # 11
This sucks. Sorry to hear that your SO is treating you this way. He may not have cheated on you but obviously his intentions are not good.
Post # 12
WTF do I do now??
You dump him, that is what you do! I dated a guy once who “liked to be private” about FB, and had similar BS excuses. That was because he was a slimeball who was using FB to find other girls to cheat with.
And even if you haven’t caught him cheating, you HAVE caught him lying. Shit, you described him as sketch! Get out now hun. And feel free to PM me to talk if you need support. I promise that dumping him is the right thing to do, and that you will find someone better.
Post # 13
@tmarino24: I can’t prove anything so I can’t do anything about it.
Um, yes you can. You can dump his ass for being totally untrustworthy and clearly not being proud of you and your relationship together!
Post # 14
This is really strange behavior. I have never untagged a boyfriend in all of our pictures while I was trying to get a job. I really think the best decision for you is to leave. You deserve someone who will treat you like a princess and want to show you off to the world. Not keep you hidden.
Post # 16
I can’t prove anything so I can’t do anything about it.
Yes you can, you leave him.