Weddingbee boards

Hi from the desert (aka, the Middle East - yes, the one waaaaay over there).

I'm "waiting", but not really. We've both known this is forever since we started dating again about 2 years ago. He even has the ring. Now it's just a matter of when.

Mr. Man and I were high school sweethearts but separated at the end of my senior year. He is two years younger, so when I left for college in California, he'd still be in the Middle East and we knew trying to stay together wasn't an option. 8000 miles apart was too far. We had no idea when we'd even see each other. So we both cried for months and eventually started dating other people. But each time we did bump into each other over the course of the next ten years, he'd tell me he's still waiting for me. But I wasn't entertaining any of it - even though he'd moved to Tennessee by then, we were still too far apart - and I kept moving with my life.

One Xmas, we both ended up in our hometown at the same time and decided to go out for an evening. I expected the night to end as it always had; him kissing me and telling me he's still waiting. Instead, I got a hug, a pat on the back and a "bye". I was pretty furious. Who did he think he was, getting over me?! Hell no. And for the first time in 10 years, I started chasing him.

Over the next few months, Facebook pokes turned into messages, then into phone calls. By now he'd also moved to CA, and we were a mere 400 miles apart. Things were getting serious, we knew this was it. Our first face-to-face meeting solidified it and we were a couple again.

So now...we've been together over two years - the first year spent long distance in CA. Then last summer we both decided to move back here to the Middle East. We don't live together, as is societal/cultural norm here. Also, it's expensive as hell, so we're taking advantage of temporarily living with our parents. And yes, grown adults with their parents is normal here, too. 

Wedding planning is going to be a bit of a challenge as according to arab tradition, there are three separate parties to plan:

The engagement party, which the bride's parents pay for and can be anything from renting out a restaurant for a small gathering of friends and family, to events as large as weddings - except the bride isn't wearing white. I'm more of the former - probably find a restaurant with a band and dance floor and call it a night.

The ceremony (known as ketib iktab), usually just family and close friends only and the officiant comes to the house, signs the papers, and you are officially married. This can take place at anytime, sometimes up to a few months before the reception.

And then the reception, which is the massive ballroom-type party paid for by the groom's family that comes with the formal invites, big white dress, flowers, centerpieces, dancefloor, DJ, catering - the fun stuff.

In addition to that, we want to have a separate reception in California a few months after the wedding for friends and family who cannot fly out here.

So. This means 3 dresses. Three venues - one in California that we'll have to plan from here. Photographers. DJ's. Food. Favors. Flowers. Centerpieces. 4 hairstyles and makeup. Invites in two languages. Some with sepearate information for the California reception. Do I try for one theme throughout? Or get to play with different ideas? What budget?!

Wow. Hi!

Wow!! What a welcome! THANK YOU!!

As for blogs...I've tried, and tried. And never really found a theme/rhyme/reason to keep it updated. So my day to day photo blog just fizzled out. My "I'm moving back to the Middle East!" blog got kinda boring (think daily posts of, "holy potatoes it's hot...again").

So I have been toying with starting a wedding site...at the very least to keep up with friends and family who are scattered over the globe. Also to post pics of the engagement party and ceremony...both of which are much smaller and rarely do people travel to attend. But maybe also a little less publicized "OMG I LOVE that wedding planning indulges my extreme type A organizational neuroses" blog.

Thing is, I keep wavering back and forth between throwing it all out there, and censoring myself in case a coworker stumbles across it, reads about my little obsessesions and the inevitable embarrassment ensues. How do you guys do it?

Sounds like you are going to be very busy...three parties!?! :)  Welcome!

@ejs4y8 ...thanks! Off to stalk Mrs. Margarita now. :)

@Smilie ...honestly, I came across the word in a book years ago and had to look it up. Thought it was pretty clever so I've adopted it as my default online nickname.

@mmmtacos ...OK. Talk about awesome names! I hear Homer Simpson every time your name pops up.

Both Mr. Man and my backgrounds are pretty convoluted...jumping all around the place. We're in Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates, but neither of us are Emirati. Like most people here, we're expats.

My background is 50/50; dad is arab and mom is american. I was born in CA, but spent most of my life here (dad's job). Moved to CA for college and worked for several years before moving back here last winter.

Mr. Man is full arab, but is also an american citizen and lived most of his life in the midwest, moving to the Middle East for high school. Then, like me, he moved back to the US for college and grad school before deciding to come back here last year.

@bamm ...WOW! So how are you doing it? Do you have contacts on both sides? How to plan from so far away!? For my CA reception, I'm hoping to make a trip over in the spring and see a few places, but otherwise, the actual bookings will be made sight unseen since I can't plan an entire reception in 2 weeks. Heck, not even engaged yet. Gotta settle on a date.

Also, what is your timeline? We're thinking a few months gap between Abu Dhabi reception and CA reception, since we want to take a honeymoon, but not really SPEND our honeymoon planning and rushing off to another party.