Another SO and his porn thread…

posted 2 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 2
Hostess
15072 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

That could have come out of one of those stupid male conversations men have. DH barely uses a computer, every once in a while he comes home, after having one of those stupid male conversations, and wants me to Google something bizarre for him or look up some other crazy thing these guys “discover” out there on the web. Honestly, I would get too worked up over it and just ask him about it. I’d really bet it’s something someone found out there, told him about it, and he just had to check the hilarity out.

Post # 3
Member
14 posts
Newbee

ceemarie7:  I agree with tksjewelry:  Guys looks up crazy stuff all the time, sometimes just out of curiousity. Even I have looked up crazy stuff out of curiousity that I’d die if I thought my honey thought I was into some of it lol. 

If it’s a recurring thing, I might read more into it, but if it’s just once, I wouldn’t be too worried. As far as porn goes, gang bangs isn’t really a super uncommon type of porn. The pregnancy thing? I imagine lots of men think pregnant women are beautiful and sexy. Hell, I’m a straight woman and I still think pregnant women are beautiful and sexy. The combo of both is a little weird but who knows how men think, you know? I’ve dated men who are loving, kind partners and wonderful to me and yet were into way weirder stuff. 

Just remember, fantasies are just that–fantasies. They’re not real. If he’s actively trying to get you pregant and then wants to invite his friends over for a love fest, I’d panic but right now I wouldn’t read too much into it. 

Post # 6
Member
7395 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I don’t think anyone has the right to judge or criticise someone else’s law abidding porn fantasies. 

I think it is also prudent to remember what one watches on film or read’s in a book is often not indictive of what they want/are like in real life. Otherwise half the women here are guilty of being into BDSM due to having read 50 shades of grey.

Post # 7
Member
14 posts
Newbee

ceemarie7:  I feel like just about every guy has something weird they’re into lol, but yeah, I can imagine why it might feel weird. I’m sure you don’t look pregnant and that you look beautiful so I wouldn’t worry that’s it. It could always be just a phase. 

On the bright side, on the scale of weird porn at least his is something somewhat vanilla that is commonly found on porn sites (and therefore probably common with other guys too). Could have been worse, could have been something illegal or unsanitary, so silver lining! 

Post # 9
Member
2289 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

ceemarie7:  Out of “what? That exists?!” curiosity, I’ve googled hey Arnold porn. I would not worry about it much.

Post # 10
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Sounds like your DH needs to learn about incognito mode.

Post # 11
Member
1275 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Naw, he didn’t do it out of curiousity “just to see.”  Lots of guys are into pregnant chicks and that’s fine.

Porn use really upsets me for a variety of reasons – admittedly insecurity being one major one – and it’s come up with my DH periodically throughout our relationship.  Don’t feel weird about bringing up porn in general if it’s upsetting to you, but I think it’s important to not demonize anyone for their weird fantasies.  Most people, I’m sure, are aroused by an idea when acted out in porn but not in reality.  Like if you two were expecting, I’m about nine thousand percent sure he wouldn’t ask you to be in a gang bang.  Haha.

I also think you’re allowed to encourage him to share his fantasies more – he probably just feels weird but honestly I think this wouldn’t bother you if you knew more about it.

Post # 12
Member
3200 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

ceemarie7:  I would try not to let it bother you. Fantasies are simply that–fantasies meaning something he probably would not or is not looking to seek out in his day to day life. There have been times when FI has borrwed my computer and I’ll get it back and look at the search history and go, “What in the damn hell!?” But then I just move on. I’ve never been bothered by porn or what my FI looks like and I feel what he does with his “alone time” isn’t really any of my business. I know if the roles were reversed I wouldn’t want him all up in my shit.

Post # 13
Member
1049 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

ceemarie7:  honestly when I was pregnant I looked up pregnant gangbangs. I couldn’t tell you why, I’ve never seen that in my Fis search history.i was literally just horny allllll the time until I got to big to do anything lol.  I finally asked him if I should dye my hair red and he said no why and I said bc his porn always involves a red head lol. I wouldn’t read to much into it unless it keeps happening. Then I would just ask! 

Post # 14
Member
478 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

j_jaye:  

I agree. I like watching ”rape” scenerios in porn but I dont actually condone rape. Pregnant Gangbang? Lol pretty harmless IMO. LOTS of men like seeing pregnant women get reemed. I dont know why but it doesnt really matter why.

Id leave it alone. There is nothing to ”look into further”. Porn is just porn and [we] watch to ”get off” isnt something we should be made to feel weird or embarrassed about and its not who we are…..

  • This reply was modified 2 years ago by  aka_nessa .
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