Another Stupid Fight

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
3420 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I think you and your FI need to work on communicating in a more mature way. Screaming at one another over batteries is ridiculous. Do you guys fight often? Maybe you two need to go to counseling

Post # 4
Member
3420 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

absolutely_tati:  If what you say is true than you know how to reduce an argument. You could have just aplogized for throwing out the batteries and offered to get new ones. It doesn’t matter if you did it or not, it wasn’t worth fighting about. Wedding planning is tough, but this should be a happy time in your life, not a time where you fight constantly. How does that prepare you for marriage?

Post # 5
Member
643 posts
Busy bee

prettyinpink11: +1. At some point, everyone has silly disagreements and gets annoyed over seemingly innocuous things. It’s all about how you handle the annoyance.

It’s important to remember that it isn’t about “winning” but about resolving the issue in the best way for the couple. Getting defensive and being more interested in talking (or yelling) than listening will never have a positive outcome and no one will win. 

It doesn’t sound like you guys have the best communication if you handle small disagreements in such an unhealthy way. 

Post # 6
Member
45 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Staying up past 3am to play video games?! Wow is he 17 years old. and when you went to work in the morning what did he do…go to bed for the day 

Post # 9
Member
3420 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

absolutely_tati:  Like I said, I think you need to find a better way to communicate or seek counseling.

Post # 10
Member
1244 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

prettyinpink11:  She did apologize and explain that throwing the batteries away wasn’t deliberate. He overreacted.

absolutely_tati:  Stress of wedding planning can start to get to you, but I wonder if the recent arguments are coming because of anxiety or hesitation over getting married. I don’t know your relationship, is that possible? Sometimes little things start to be a big deal when you think “I’ll have to deal with this the rest of my life.”

Post # 11
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Wedding planning can be stressful but in my opinion, no wedding is worth the sort of stress that damages your relationship. Although what I would also say is that if planning a wedding is resulting in all these fights, how do you plan to deal with the ups and downs of life that will invariably arise after you marry?

Again, this is only my opinion, but there’s certain sorts of dialogue that will never assist in a positive outcome from a disagreement. Words like “lying” are destructive, especially over something so trivial as an accidental disposal of batteries!

Also, if someone can’t accept an honest apology without things turning into a courtroom drama, there’s something fundamentally wrong about how you are communicating with a partner. It occurs to me that both of you could do with some counselling in order to improve communication skills so that trivial disagreements don’t turn into ludicrous dramas. I’d also suggest that this is needed now. Not after you get married.

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 8 months ago by  .
Post # 14
Member
222 posts
Helper bee

absolutely_tati:  Fighting about batteries may seem pointless, but maybe there’s more to this than the eye meets? Often times petTy fights stems from bigger issues. I’m not picking sides, because in the end it’s not about who’s right and wrong. But I would have a serious conversation with your fiancé, maybe help get to the root of the problen. Goodluck!

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 8 months ago by  soon2bhitched.
Post # 15
Member
326 posts
Helper bee

get him the biggest pack of batteries you can find and put them on the table. He will get over it and realize his mistake. 

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