(Closed) Antsy about possible no-shows

posted 7 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
10851 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@jillocb: I had 3 no-shows to our wedding, but also 3 guests bring “Dates” we weren’t expecting, so it balanced out. It was a bit of juggling and I felt bad because those dates didn’t have place cards, etc, so it was clear they weren’t invited, but the wait staff we hired were excellent and managed to squeeze the people in next to the guest they had come with. Unfortunately no-shows are a part of weddings and even though  you  would never do it, it doesn’t mean everyone else is the same way 🙁 

I suppose the best thing you could do is call up said friends and point blank say “My deadline for the caterer is here, and I just want to make sure your RSVP is still confirmed because I feel like we’ve fallen out of touch lately. If you’ve changed your mind that’s totally fine, but I need to let the caterer know so they can order the right amount of food, etc”.

Post # 4
Member
4510 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We had a similar situation–our wedding was about 2 – 3 hours away from where many guests lived. Almost all the guests stayed overnight, but 2 groups (one couple, and 1 family of 5) who RSVP-ed yes but who had not reserved rooms ended up not showing. 7 people! Gulp.

I think bakerella‘s advice is good–try to get confirmation from these guests again that they are coming, and subtly reinforce to them the fact that plans are being made and food is being ordered based on their response. Normally I wouldn’t even hint at these details to a guest, but in this case–it’s worth it! It’s such a bummer when people don’t show up, especially when it seems like they probably weren’t 100% planning on attending anyway.

Post # 5
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

No shows are common at weddings which is why many people will tell you to low ball your final guest count by a few people. You can always pay for more people that show up, but they will never pay for people who don’t show up.

Just plan them into the seating chart, but give your caterer a number at least 4 people short of your total count in case they don’t show up.

Post # 6
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I would low ball by a few people just in case. Our caterers prepared 5% more food than necessary to prepare for possible extras. The PP is right – they will not refund you for people who don’t show, but they will be prepared to charge you if they do (and will also have the extra food to handle it). Obviously, you still have to have the rentals on hand, “just in case” (ie you still have to have a physical place setting for them). But at least you wouldn’t have to pay for the food.

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