Post # 1
Does anyone here get really bad anxiety? I have panic attacks sometimes. I’m always afraid I’m saying or doing the wrong thing. That I’m embarassing myself or my FI. It makes me want to crawl into bed and never leave. I have no idea how I’m supposed to “walk down an aisle” in front of all those people. It makes me sick to my stomache.
FI had a work event last night and I’m stressing and crying all this morning because I feel sick and upset like I did something wrong there. I hate it. I wish I could just function like other people. Does anyone else feel this way? How do you deal with it?
Post # 3
@Tangled: hey i’m suffering from PTSD at the moment and anxiety. I know how rough it is, sorry you’re going through this. Maybe you could aks your FI to talk to you about last night, I’m sure he’ll tell you that you were fantastic and you made him proud.
Anxiety can sometimes be linked to low self esteem, do you exercise regularly and see your friends? i know these things can seem scary but they really helped me. So far I’ve managed to avoid meds and I want to keep it that way.
Maybe try and remember that you are your own worst critic and other people don’t see you the way you see yourself – I bet they think you’re great 🙂 Keep your chin up and try to work on your confidence it will make a difference xx
Post # 4
It definitely sounds like you suffer from anxiety, I can relate because I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder back in college. It’s not fun… panic attacks make you feel like you’re dying :-/
The good news is that you don’t have to keep feeling this way. Consider seeing your doctor to talk about your symptoms. Your doctor can be helpful in referring you to a qualified mental health professional, who can accurately diagnose you (if necessary) and treat you.
I suffered for years before I broke down-don’t wait to get to that point. I was in therapy for about a year and a half and took antidepressants (which are also used to treat anxiety) for about 1 year. I am a completely different person now and no longer suffer from anxiety like I used to. There is hope!! 🙂
Post # 5
I completely understand. I do have anxiety, and I feel just like you do in social situations. There are a couple things I do that help me relax a bit.
1) Everybody is awkward in some way, even if they don’t show it. You don’t have to be the life of the party, the center of attention for people to like you. Generally speaking, if you’re a nice person, people will like you :-).
2) I do the exact same thing as you…I could have 99 things go right, 1 thing go wrong, and I will focus on that one thing! What I do is when I find those thoughts creeping into my head, I have to tell myself to stop, that I am human, and while I make mistakes, I do a lot of things right. Then, I think about the things that I did well.
3) Being in situations where it’s somebody else’s “territory” is always easier. When I was around FI’s lab mates, it was hard for me to carry on a conversation because I don’t know exactly what we have in common. However, the more times I was around them, the easier it was. You pick up on bits and pieces of their lives, and you can ask questions about that.
I’m sorry you’re going through this! It does get easier with practice.
Post # 6
I have PTSD, OCD, and panic disorder. I have been treated with different medications, but what it comes down to, for me, is taking time to myself, meditation, and journaling. I really hate medication, so this works for me!
Post # 7
I suffered from Generalized Anxiety Disorder as well, I’m on medication for it and it really helps. Before I was diagnosed I was at the point where I was sick to my stomach 24/7 and kept going to the hospital for chest pains. It’s such a difficult disorder to live with, but with medication my life is a lot more bearable.
Don’t be ashamed to suffer from anxiety, it’s very common. The worst part is the people who don’t understand it. You’ll have people who will tell you “Just relax” or “stop worrying”, just ignore them and do what you need to do to feel better.
Post # 8
Then I feel guilty because, even when my FI has a legitimate reason to be upset with me, I go into melt down mode and have panic attacks and freak out. He should be allowed to be upset with me when I do stupid things. But I can’t handle it. I feel like such a child. I have tried diet, exercise, yoga, therapy… nothing helps me.
Post # 9
I had some pretty severe anxiety and panic attacks a few years ago, so I can definitely relate. I still have panic attacks occasionally, or get anxious about things that I know are petty, but I’m getting better at controlling it.
My advice to you is to exercise and take a look at your diet (changing my habits really helped me start to feel better and cope better with my anxiety), talk to your doctor (to make sure it IS anxiety, and to possibly get meds or a referral) and to check out your local library or bookstore. There are a lot of great books you can get on identifying and coping with anxiety.
Above all, be open with your FI about it. I know that helped me tremendously, so hopefully it will you too.
Post # 10
I’ve suffered from anxiety and panic attacks since I was 15!!! I can control them a lot better now at the age of 26…if you ever need support i’m here for you!!
I’m also a hypocondriac I think I was born one! I have so many funny stories my family tells me of when I was younger thinking I had brain tumors when I had a headache!
Recently I had my confirmation, and I was infront of the whole Easter mass, I had the worst palpitations and I felt like I was going to be sick, my heart was racing, I was hot, and I felt like my heart was beating irregularly which in turn freaked me out more…once I was done being confirmed and sat back down, I was fine again…it’s so weird what stress and anxiety do to you!
I too have no idea how I’ll walk down the asile a year from now, but I will do it, and I’ll stare straight at my future husband and hold my dad really tight, he’s always good at making people laugh so I said he better have some jokes and a glass of champagne ready for me before I walk!
Post # 11
As much as I love my FI, he is one of those annoying “just relax” people. He is so chill all the time. He’s never suffered from any sort of anxiety and no one in his family has. He thinks it’s made up and that I just overreact all the time. I try so hard to talk to him about it, but he just smiles at me like I’m being melodramatic. I have no idea what to do to get through to him that it is a real disorder.
Post # 12
@Tangled: Yah my fiance doesn’t get them either…although a few occasions maybe a handful of times he has had palpitations or wakes up in the middle of the night and can’t go back to sleep right away…but that’s it.
Lucky bastard! lol
My fiance is good about it though…there have been times in the 5 years we’ve been together that I had palps so bad that I would talk to him on the phone until I felt sleepy or “OK”. He is very understanding!
Post # 14
I sure do. I think I drive myself crazy though so that probably doesn’t help! Please PM me if you have any questions about anything! I’ll always be here for you.