(Closed) Any advice? Want to get ready with only a select few bridesmaids.

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Are they planning on geting their hair done by the same person as you? Maybe you could space out their appointments from yours so the amount of time you would be around each other would be minimal. Where is your FMIL getting ready?

I think you will probably hurt their feelings if you invite everyone, but them to get ready at your house.

Post # 4
Member
3539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

oh thats so tough. Im very sorry to hear. I really just think instead of waiting for them to drop out. You should maybe tell them that their not in it and your sorry. There is NO point in you to be feel as tho you are walking on eggshells all day, its YOUR day not theirs! I might be a little blunt about this, but seriously.. with all the money you pay for weddings these days, it should be the best day of your life not the most miserable.

Post # 5
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Like mrskesslertobe said – are they getting their hair and makeup done by the same person as everyone else? If not, then just tell them everyone’s getting ready at their own place and meeting up at (place) at (time) for pictures. If they find out the day of that all the girls went to your place to get ready, just tell them they surprised you and figured it’d be a great send off.

Post # 8
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee

I think you should have an open discussion with them. Start by asking them what they were thinking of doing to get ready, where they want to get ready (because they might want to spend time with their brother that morning), who will be doing their hair and makeup, etc. Maybe if you can make it seem like a group decision for them to get ready somewhere else, it won’t seem like you don’t want them there. Also, who really cares about pictures? Maybe FSILs should get the pre-ceremony pictures with their brother and FILs.

Or another idea- have your fiance say he wants his whole family together the morning of. Where is FMIL getting ready?

Post # 9
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

Ooh, so sorry about the situation.  I agree with you about not kicking them out.  SOunds like it’s not worth the family drama for one day of them walking down the aisle and posing for a few pictures. 

I like the idea of this  centering around the hair appointments.  I think you should see ifthe BMs want their hair done by your stylist.  If they do, conveniently allow the FSILs to have the last appointments.  Then they can be the last to show up.  If they want their hair done by someone else, that’s just as easy to ask them to come a bit later.  Then they can just show up for pics.  Or even, you could tell them to meet you at the church.  Then you can get a few shot in at home, with just the Bms you like 😉

Post # 10
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Personally I think you should get to the root of the ACTUAL problem.  Which would be WHY they seemingly hate you.  I mean point blank ask them, “What’s going on? What did I do to make you dislike me so much?”  This is your real problem, seeing as how they are going to be your FAMILY.  Once you do this, the getting ready situation should fall into place naturally. I hope it all works out.

Post # 12
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m sorry to hear that.  In that case, my thoughts are to not make it a formal get-together.  Tell everyone that they are free to get their hair and make-up done wherever they want.  Then mention to the other girls that your house is available for them to get ready at and you would love for them to get ready with you.

Some people are so ignorant and unfortunately will probably never see things differently. 

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