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Any Bees that Used to have an Eating Disorder?

posted 3 months ago in Wellness
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    1.
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    Bumble bee
    allergicbee    May 26, 2013   NY

    Hi everyone,

    I am just wondering if any bees can relate. I have had an eating disorder since the age of 12, I am now 26. The eating disorder involved very restrictive eating to overexercising etc. When I was 19 I weighed 93 lbs, I am 5'4. Today I weigh around 120-124 lbs, which I know is healthy but sometimes (okay maybe all the time) there is a voice inside my head that wants to restrict again. I get upset and blame my being in a relationship the reason for not being capable of losing weight. I never take it out on my boyfriend or anything but I just get frustrated within myself and that does affect the relationship. I used to feel like I had SO much control over my life when I restricted, I felt like I "had" to be skinny to compete with other girls and find the man of my dreams and it sort of motivated me. I know it is a messed up way of thinking, but sometimes I miss that feeling of accomplishment. Can anybody relate or offer any advice?

     
    2.
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    Worker bee
    harperlynn    December 12, 2012   Richmond, VA

    I have had an eating disorder off and on for years. All I can say is that I am part of many pro-ana websites that have really gotten me back into restricting. I hope that you do the opposite and realize how much you hurt yourself everyday. It's an obsession and I hate every second of it. I cannot give you any on advice on how to recover I can only hope that you remember the misery of the obsession.

     

    PM me if you want to talk. :)

     
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    Helper bee
    Jade33    August 3, 2007  

    Pro-ana websites? Omg I forgot these horrors exist. That is so disturbing. I've never struggled with a real eating disorder, but my sister was bulimic. My advice to you is to seek help, and seek it right away. Look for support groups or a therapist to discuss your unhealthy body image and compulsion to restrict. My understanding is that this never goes away, similar to any other addiction (drugs, etc) it is something you always need to be aware of and fight against, find actual, real things you can accomplish rather than self-harm. Also does your boyfriend know? It would be really good to get support and encouragement from him as well.

     
    3.
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    Helper bee
    Jade33    August 3, 2007  

    Pro-ana websites? Omg I forgot these horrors exist. That is so disturbing. I've never struggled with a real eating disorder, but my sister was bulimic. My advice to you is to seek help, and seek it right away. Look for support groups or a therapist to discuss your unhealthy body image and compulsion to restrict. My understanding is that this never goes away, similar to any other addiction (drugs, etc) it is something you always need to be aware of and fight against, find actual, real things you can accomplish rather than self-harm. Also does your boyfriend know? It would be really good to get support and encouragement from him as well.

     
    4.
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    Bumble bee
    KT808    October 18, 2012  

    Yep - a life-long binge-er here. I know it is the opposite of anorexia but it is still an eating disorder. Sparkpeople.com has helped me a lot with coping strategies and since I started tracking my food intake I have reduced my binging (am I spelling that right?) from every day to being binge-free 85% of the time.

     
    5.
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    503 posts
    Busy bee
    Ashley_B    September 22, 2012  

    I've stugged with bulimia for 12 years, but I guess its more ED-NOS for the last 5 years. Everyday is definitly a stuggle.  Every meal I pre-think, and if I feel I ate to much I will regret it for days after. Getting help can only go so far, its changing your thinking about food. Which is VERY hard.

     
    6.
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    Busy bee
    Kkaattii    April 21, 2012  

    The first thought I had when I stepped into my wedding dress was "damn I wonder how much weight I can lose before the wedding". I literally started to freak out thinking omg how am I going to throw up in this thing.. It's a lifelong sickness. Today I weigh 140lbs. The highest I ever have..I think about it all day every day. I have no advice for you, I need help too!

     
    7.
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    2,323 posts
    Buzzing bee
    Miss Orchard    September 8, 2012   Cambridge, MA

    I was diagnosed with ED-NOS when I was in college. My worst times were in college when I would restrict/over-exercise.

    I got help through a therapist, nutritionist, and psychiatrist. Honestly, it exhausted me. And the only time I ever really lost weight was when I ate at least 1200 cals and exercised moderately. I got sick of it, and finally, it went away. It took a lot of work on my part.

    To this day I still struggle with anxiety around my weight and eating habits but am able to keep it in check. I still have a black-and-white mentality on eating (all or nothing; an entire pack of oreos or none if I'm dieting). You can do it....get help please!

     
    8.
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    Sugar bee
    earrings    January 8, 2011   Palmerston North, NZ

    I can relate! I developed anorexia when I was 16. In the past year and a half I am improved a lot and now I am what the doctor calls a "healthy" weight. But I still have frequent hateful thoughts about my body. I dont know what my actual weight is because I have banned myself from seeing the numbers on a scale, but I know I gained weight over the holidays because two pairs of pants no longer fit me. So I have been struggling with that recently.

    I second what everyone else is saying- you cant recover from this alone and it would be a good idea to get some help from a counsellor. It took me ages to find a counsellor who I actually liked (and now I have a wonderful one who is the reason I think I have been able to recover this far) so if you dont feel comfortable with the first one you try, then shop around. It is best to find one that you feel "fits" with your needs.

     

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