Post # 1
My husband came home last night and said his mother told him, someone contacted her and said that My Belly seems to have a little pudge and ask her was I pregnant?
Um, NO I am just gaining weight and I have noticed it too since the wedding – hence my starting to walk now.
They didn’t ask me, and we still don’t know who it is. Also I was feeling horrible yesterday – SINUSES and mother in laws 1st question was Is She Pregnant … lol and told my husband if I am its his fault…. hilarious!!! (I love her)
People seem to be sitting around waiting on us to get pregnant, is this happening to any other Newlywed’s??? Family just sitting around waiting…
Post # 3
Yep, I have made it perfectly clear that we are not trying anytime soon but it hasn’t stopped anyone. The holidays were the worst. Mother-In-Law was whining to my Darling Husband that she wouldn’t live to see her grandchildren get married.
ETA: Didn’t really answer the question. I feel no pressure to get pregnant just because my ovaries all of a sudden seem like an appopriate talking point to people. We are the only people who will be deciding if/when to have kids.
Post # 4
I’m not feeling pressured, per se, but we do have a lot of people ask about it. My Mother-In-Law really DOESNT want us to have kids yet, cause she thinks we are too young or something, but other members of her family DO want us to have kids. It’s confusing to keep up with everyone’s opinions when they ask – especially because last Xmas I was ill and missed the family get-together, sparking speculation on my status. It’s like now there’s nothing left for them to do but wait for us to have kids, which is kind of crazy to me because we’re going through so many other changes – potential grad school, which means potential HUGE move, etc – why are they concentrating only on offspring?
My own family is very clear that it won’t be happening for a long time and they’re ok with it, so that’s kind of a relief.
Post # 5
Yes, it happened to us, too. Family and friends were on pregnancy watch because we were “the next in line” to get pregnant. MIL has been very good about it, though. My friends let it go after some of them accidently got pregnant and there are now enough baby showers, etc, so we don’t have to “fill the void” anymore.
We had one person (mother of a friend) unsolicited lecturing us that we should get on it and not waste any more time, because we’re getting too old and having only one child is unacceptable. I thought that was really uncalled for and rude.
Post # 6
No pressure really, just a lot of questions. Everyone assumes that directly after marriage comes baby but neither of us are anywhere close to ready for that yet. My BIL & SIL just had a baby 6 months ago so as far as DHs side is concerned, they’re good for a while. I’m an only child and my mom is well aware that babies are not in the cards for us right now and she’s totally supportive of that.
Post # 7
I think people usually just ask to make small talk and it isn’t really meant to “presure” couples. After we got married people asked, but once you say not for a while people usually drop it.
Post # 8
I know right, because when people ask us, I just smile and shake my head. They Love asking though..when are y’all getting pregnant…. or when either you or the other daughter in law get preggo I got loads of clothes for y’all, when you gone have a baby….. so, I decided to tell one person… when I am sure you can babysit. Haha shut her up quick.
I don’t feel pressured either, our love life is ours, and we will get preggos when God allows. Now out of our bedroom.
Post # 9
I’m not being pressured about it at all, BUT I think I would be if my SIL on DH’s side wasn’t super vocal about wanting kids soon, and my mother is not pressuring me because she knows our life is really not set up for that right now (just bought a flat that would be too small, haven’t found a job yet, etc)
Though, my mom was pressuring my brother’s girlfriend about marriage and kids the last couple years of their relationship, to the point of getting overly attached to their dog, her granddog. This is continuing even after they have broken up.
Which is all a relief for us, because we’re nowhere near even knowing if we even want kids.
Post # 10
I have been asked about it a few times but only by people that don’t know us very well. We both have raised our kids and I just tell them that I am 40 and this baby factory is closed for business.
Post # 11
Oh yeah. Holidays were fun…..Everyone asking when/where/what position the baby will be conceived in….ok, maybe not the last one.
At least my BIL & SIL just had their first baby, which I thought would take the pressure off. But at her shower, a random relative of hers (who I had never met and don’t know who she is) told me I needed to ‘eat more’ so ‘you can be the next one!’………um, what? I’m not even close to being too skinny, so I just stared and walked away.
And who is this biotch asking if you’re pregnant because you ‘have a pudge’? How rude!
Post # 12
@ieatunicorns: then tell my in-laws to drop it! we’ve made it clear that it’s not for several years but they still seem to think if they mention it enough, that we’ll magically change our minds and get pregnant just like that.
Mother-In-Law has even commented that ‘you don’t need to wait as long as BIL/SIL did’….apparently waiting 6 years was not ok….if that’s not pressure, I don’t know what is!
My sex life was not up for discussion before marriage, and it will stay that way after marriage!
Post # 13
I actually like getting asked about when we’re getting pregnant. We’re not trying any time soon though. My Mother-In-Law specifically stared at my stomach last time I was there though. It was pretty obvious I thought that she was seeing if I was pregnant.
Post # 14
Definitely! My Mother-In-Law desperately wants me to be pregnant, and my grandfather likes to ask whenever I see him. Last time I saw him, he said that I was looking a little thick around the middle, wink wink nudge nudge. I told him no, I was just getting fat, but I’d keep him updated on my uterus when the time came. Gotta love when the elderly lose the filter, LOL! I reacted a bit offhand which I feel a bit bad about, but my grandfather also has a habit of bugging women about their weight even after being told a million times that it’s a good way to end up getting in trouble, LOL!
Post # 15
Haha good you only have one side after you… mine isn’t waiting around for it, but its hinted around sometimes
Post # 16
you: We had one person (mother of a friend) unsolicited lecturing us that we should get on it and not waste any more time, because we’re getting too old and having only one child is unacceptable.
me: I would have been a little warm with her about that… none of her business.