Any other brides out there doing it 100% on their own?

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
2892 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Megbee617: selfish, no. Unreasonable, yes. A leopard doesn’t change its spots. 

I’m planning without input from either family but I didn’t hope for it or expect it. So I can’t be disappointed. 

Just keep doing you. If no one helps, they get no input. It’s fun that way. 

Post # 3
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I got remarried, but I planned it without input from either side.  Honestly, no one in the world will be as excited about your wedding as you and your FI, and that is ok!

Post # 4
Member
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Awww sorry you are having a difficult time!!  Weddings can really bring the best or worst in people and situations.  It’s suppose to be a happy occasion but it can be the worst time of your life with planning.

You’re not being selfish.  I understand the whole thing about the wedding being about you and your fiance and of course it’s nice to feel special once in a while.  That being said though, some people are just not into weddings.  They could be happy for you but with the way life is (it’s a real bitch LOL), sometimes when it comes to weddings you have to fend for yourself and you have to be prepared for it.  You have to be prepared in planning a wedding all by yourself in case things like this happens where people are just not that interested in it.  That’s kinda what I’m doing.  My FH and I tried hard to save as much money as we can so that we don’t have to depend on anyone when it comes to costs.  It’s not easy of course.  We saved up enough money for certain things but I guess we are lucky in a sense that my family is helping so it’s not near impossible to pay for everything but we had that initial mentality that we cannot depend on other people just because they say they will help.  Things happen and sometimes, things don’t go as planned.

Don’t worry about them then if they don’t want to do much.  That gives you some power then in your decisions.  If they want to invite more and more people, you have the power to say, “well if you want to invite more that is out of our budget, then you have to pitch in for them” since that is what a budget is for.  Be assertive.  This is YOUR and YOUR FH’s DAY.  Take hold of it and don’t let anyone bring you down about it.

Post # 5
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I’m feeling the same way as you my dear. My parents have been super supportive and one of my future sister in laws and maybe two friends but everyone else could care less. I try to remind myself that everyone leads busy lives and what not, but when you’re the one in your group of friends & family who makes a big deal about every elses wedding and life events and noone does for you, it kind of hurts a bit. My future in laws have been absolutely shitty with this wedding too, my FI warned me that they would be and I am so hurt for my FI on how they don’t care unless it concerns them shelling out money which they have complained so much about. (and we are paying 100% for the wedding ourselves, it was regarding their trip)

I agree that noone cares as much as you do about your day – Just try to breathe, book yourself in for some massages and focus on the one’s that do care. My stress level has gone down a bit the past few weeks since I have been trying to focus on the positives.

Post # 6
Member
5351 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

I honestly think they aren’t giving you the reaction you are looking for because it is more than a year away. I bet if it was July of next year, you would have more people excited and helping. 

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