Post # 1
Hello, Weddingbee, I have never posted before but I have been looking up posts and blogs on weddingbee throughout my wedding planning for different advice and help.
My wedding is in two days and I feel like the most awkward, terrible bride ever. I am very excited to marry my man, in fact, I wish we could skip the rest of the hoop-lah and just do the ceremony. Really wishing an elopement was possible at the moment.
I have always been reserved/shy and do not enjoy being the center of attention. I am DREADING the next few days where I have to see family and friends and talk to them. I feel like the worst bride! I am so thankful we are having so many people come, but I just want to blend into the background instead of having everyone look at me all day. This is crazy, right, who doesn’t want to talk to family and friends?!?!
We live in a new place from everyone else, and 80% of our guest list is coming from out of town. I just feel so bad that these people took days off work and drove or flew many, many, many hours to come to my wedding. I feel like, oh they didn’t have to do that, I’m not that worth amount of attention.
Anyway, just posting to see if I’m the only crazy socially awkward shy bride. :-/ At the end of the day, I just want it to be Sunday night when I will finally be alone at home relaxing with my new husband. (ok so Saturday we’ll be alone, too, but we’ll be busy)
Post # 3
I also wanted to elope so it wouldn’t be about me! My fiancé has two daughters so I wanted it to be about the four of us. With that said I also said that I didn’t want it to be a big thing, needless to say the mothers took over :/
Post # 4
@sociallyanxious: Welcome to Weddingbee and congratulations on your upcoming wedding.
I can relate, and this is exactly why we’re going to elope 😛
You’re introverted like me. I hardly ever enjoy being the center of attention (at least not in a big group of people!). I don’t think you’re a bad bride at all.. you’re just being YOU.
I was so nervous watching the royal wedding.. I thought OMG how did Kate handle it with a couple billion people watching her?!
I guess my advice would be to just try to enjoy the day… try to focus on your fiance, etc. in the end it will go by really fast.
Post # 5
Im not even shy and im nervous about being in front of 60 people!! I just talked fiancé into doing simple vows instead of grand self written vows because I just can’t tell him all that gooey stuff in front of our guests. Iwill completely lose it.
Post # 6
I hate being the center of attention too. I refused to do a head table because I hate being in front of a bunch of people, especially not knowing a number of them.
Post # 7
Having had a “traditional” wedding with my ex and now an elopement with my current husband, I’d elope again in a split second! I loved it just being the two of us there. So, since that’s not an option for you since the wedding is in two days…just imagine that it is just the two of you during the ceremony. Block everyone out and just focus on your husband and your happiness. Enjoy the moment, it goes by quickly!
Post # 8
Thanks everyone for the encouragement and just the relief to know I’m not the only one! I’m sure I am just making everything a much bigger deal than it really is, and I know I will be able to enjoy my wedding day once Saturday comes around.
Post # 9
Same here. I have had no problem planning this wedding– hasn’t been too stressful, things fall into place where needed, we haven’t fought at all.
BUT. When I sat down to work on the timeline and ceremony timeline/program, I came very close to having a panic attack. The thought of having a crowd for the most personal moment yet in my life terrifies me. I know I’m going to cry, and I hate public displays of emotion.
It doesn’t help that Fiance is a complete social butterfly and I am a total introvert. He and I are social opposites– he’s the life of the party and I’m in the corner. Sometimes it’s good for us, sometimes it’s bad.
I wish you luck– just take some deep breaths, be sure you are taking care of yourself and get away when you need to. No one can fault you for using the bathroom or having to take a nap if you need an excuse to get away!
Post # 10
Read this post! http://apracticalwedding.com/2012/08/classic-apw-your-wedding-is-not-a-show/ You are not the center of attention, you are the center. Your wedding is not a show, but the reason for the party.
I too have been struggling with being the “center of attention.”
Post # 11
My strategy was to make my wedding a “formal” occassion. I made it clear to all the ladies invited that I want them to go all out and wear formal evening gowns. I don’t want to be the only one in a floor length gown, I would feel like a total idiot in a room full of people in cocktail dresses. The girls are now all really excited for my wedding because they get to dress up, and I definitely won’t have all the spotlight on me because everyone will be equally fancy! Voila!
Post # 12
Congratulations and don’t stress. I have felt the same way. Before the engagement I always said small backyard or quick luncheon wedding but once the ring came I said ya know what for once in my life I want to be Cinderella. I have 8 more months but every time I get scared about everyone watching me I think the people who are watching will be friends and family I love. No one else, no strangers or judges! The same people who I’ve watched get married and have other occasions in their lives that I stood on the sidelines and witnessed. Don’t rush for the day to be over you might regret it. Deep breaths and enjoy! Like I said these are not strangers judging you these are loved one’s who couldn’t be happier to be included in your special day. Hope this helps!! Post some pics!
Post # 13
I’m totally socially awkward. I hate being the center of attention for any reason! But I’m figuring that the whole day is going to be going by so quickly, that I won’t have time to freak out. I also am having a smaller wedding, so I know almost everyone there pretty well, so that’s comforting at least.
Post # 14
@chloeburch: Great article. Thanks!
Post # 15
yup me too thats why i hope to get 2 dresses that make me feel stunning so i can enjoy the day.
Post # 16
I feel the same way! I have begged my Fiance for an elopement but our huge families would not be pleased. I have almost had anxiety attacks because I get so nervous about the attention being on me, even with telling everyone we were engaged! I didn’t want to go to my Fiance recreational softball game because a lot of people were going to be there and ask to see my ring and ask about how he proposed. I just don’t like it.
With all that being said, we’re going to try to have the smallest possible wedding (which in our case will be about 150+)
I’m sure that in the end, it will all workout though!!!