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Hey Hive, just a quick question: are there any other long engagement brides out there?
We're about 6 months through a 2.5 year engagement. It was originally a 1.5 year engagement, but we'll be getting married after school (I graduate this coming may and originally, we'd be married a year after), and the mister decided to go an extra year to double major, which is great, but it'll take him an extra year so we had to add a year onto our date.
So when we were at the 1.5 yr engagement we looked at reception venues because most book up here between 1 year and 1.5 yrs, and we found the PERFECT place. We'll definitely book it when time gets closer, and we're definitely getting married in my home town church.
So, with such a long engagement, what can you do/plan the rest of the time? Sure, we know the venue, but what else can I plan for? I feel like it seems too early when the wedding is a little over 2 years away.
Also, how do you pass the time? Is it hard for anyone else when the found the person they want to be with, and just can't wait for it to happen?
Thanks Hive :)
I totally feel you there. I am not as long as you are, only 1.5, but I'm aching for something to do. Since we are having our wedding on 7.3.2010, we've already reserved our venue, but everything else is on hold until June.
I've been focusing on bonding activities with the wedding party and seaching for the best deals. I'd like to DIY a lot of things, so I'm taking time out now to try things.
Mostly, I'm wishing that the wedding was this summer, but trying to remind myself that the extra time will be worth it!
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My engagement was 2 years and 2 months and now my wedding is around the corner! Think of the time as a buffer in case you change your mind about a wedding decision like decor etc. I liked it so I wouldn't stress out but of course I still did and still am! I know it is hard when all you want to do it get married already. But you have time to find bargains, to find the perfect shoes, etc. For me I could research flowers I really liked when I didn't know anything about flowers. I got to diy my ring nest instead of buy it, FIgure out what music selections I wanted and what dj's I wanted to call when the time came. etc. Ask friends for their referrals for vendors. One biggy was I had time to wait for trunk shows for dresses to come around and make appt.'s for them since I was in no rush. It is up to you what you do with the time but I would use it to your advantage and do what planning you can during your long engagement. I promise one day your wedding will be around the corner and you will be happy you had that extra planning time!
We have a long engagement -- 19 months. We did it primarily so that we could pay for things as we went along so we wouldn't go into debt to pay for the wedding, and so far it's working out really well. We have our church and reception venues, and we're just about to book our photographer.
I think that it's going to be hard to wait until next June to roll around, but I like knowing that I have time to figure out exactly what I want for invites, flowers, colors, etc.
Sometimes the waiting is harder -- for example, last night we went to a jewelery store "just to look" at wedding bands. My FI found something he loved, and I found something that is absolutely perfect to fit with my e-ring. If we decide to go with them, we'll have a lot of time to pay for them, but now I just want those rings on my finger!
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I've been engaged since April of last year, and we originally planned our date for summer of 2009. Due to the economy and not being able to find a full time job post college, we have to push it back another year to the summer of 2010. It can be frustrating at times. I blame myself for needing to push back the date. Right now all I want to do is elope and not deal with the stress of answering the question, "Did you set a date yet?"
In the mean time I'm trying to figure out the details of my wedding and always looking for inspiration from weddingbee. The extra time lets me soak in all the elements of the wedding that I might not have time for otherwise.
i was engaged 1 month short of 3 years ( do i win?!) I didnt book anything till probably about 6 months out, so I had alot of free time. I spent it all planning, getting ideas of things I liked, didnt like, etc. You also have time to save money too for the wedding. One great thing to do to pass the time is get organized. Cause one the time arrives taht you can actually do stuff, you will be ahead of the game and hit the ground running. Research florists, bakers, etc.. you dont need to meet with them in person yet, but you can see what you liked and dont from the vendors.
I actaully think the long engagement was a good thing in the end. I was way less stressed.
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another 19monther here. We're going to look at the venue this weekend, and I already contacted the photographer. lol. The hardest thing for me is that after participating in my sister's wedding planning and a close friend's, I already know most of the vendors I want to use. But, we're spending these 19 months saving and saving some more and I'm spending a lot of time researching and thinking and perfecting all my ideas. I actually make a lot of big decisions that way....starting the thinking process early enough that when it comes time to make the final decision it is perfect!
Wow! 2.5 years is a really long time. My fiance and I got engaged in June of '08 and won't be married until January or April of '10. It's been a long time, but we're enjoying being engaged. It's a nice phase to be in, I think.
It does make it harder to plan, but we've been using the time to save money, reserve vendors, and decide on the details (as well as DIY! It's so much easier to do that when you have a long time!).
My fiance and I got engaged Oct. of '08 but we are not getting married until November of 2010. As others have already mentioned, we are trying to pay for the wedding ourselves so we are paying for things in increments so that we would not need to go in debt.
I love having all the extra time to plan too. We already have our minister booked so we've been checking out reception sites and making sure it is one of the few things we book first. I feel less stressed knowing that we can take things in baby steps rather than running to the finish line.
We are making our own invitations and save the dates and just enjoying our time being engaged. My fiance and I have been dating since high school and we've been together 9 years prior to getting engaged. Therefore, waiting two more years to get married wasn't that big of a deal for us. 
27-monther, here. :P We'll be getting married in early August 2010 due to Mr. Spin finishing up school. I haven't booked anyone yet, I've really just been using the time to get ideas, figure out what I like/don't like, talking to my recently married friends and see what they would have done different, and start planning my DIY projects. Just by looking at websites I've ruled out some vendors due to price or their end product, so that helps. :)
We're planning on settling on a reception site in the next couple weeks and after that we'll get down to the nitty gritty of the rest of the vendors. I think a long engagement can help give you time to negotiate (or lock in 2009 prices for a 2010 wedding even!) for a better deal.
23 month engagement here... we're waiting until after I finish law school and get past the bar exam before we get married. We just figured it would be a lot easier (and a lot less stressful on me) than trying to rush from an October 08 engagement to planning a wedding during law school and getting married the following summer.
There are definitely some moments when I wish it was a shorter amount of time... but it's given me a lot of moments to look around, take my time on making my decisions, and getting what I really want, not just what's available. And I've definitely gotten to do some DIY already and I'm glad I have a year and a half left to plan and do any other projects I want to.
I watched two of my friends who are also in law school work on planning their weddings for last summer and there was a lot of stress involved because of everything (job hunting, school work, wedding planning) having to be done at once. I just needed to be able to take my time and move at a slower pace... I didn't want to be overly stressed right before our wedding.
28 month engagement here...kinda crazy, but my FI and I wanted to wait till he was out of school and we are also paying for most of the wedding ourselves so we need time to save up some money.
Although it is hard to wait so long, i must say that it is really nice to really think about your decisions and to have no pressure or stress of time. this summer we will start looking at reception venues and go from there. we are also planning in Pittsburgh (where my FI in school) for a Chicago wedding and i couldn't imagine how stressed out i'd be if i was in a time crunch!!
enjoy our long engagements ladies!
We're drawing to a close on a 20+ month engagement. We jumped in almost immediately to nail down as much of the "big" stuff as possible, then took a break to enjoy LIFE apart from wedding planning, and now, we're back in the thick of things!
I loved that we were able to secure cheaper rates for some vendors, and get our first pick for them as well! (not that I'm competitive or anything). 
Hhaha Miss bruchetta ! I'm totally the same way on getting things done early.
We will have a 20 month engagement, we're about 11 in and 9 to go ... We really enjoyed our first year engaged just doing things piece by piece and now as we are getting closer we are starting to get really really excited!
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Wow I just realized we have been engaged for over 2 years, in fact it will be 3 years this August. He had to finish his masters thesis and then find a job, then I lost my job and had to find a new job and now here we are barely even thinking of planning a wedding. It's crazy how fast time flies by! I guess when I start to think about it, it's not really a big deal in the grand scheme because we're going to be together for the rest of our lives so we're not in a hurry. I get a lot of comments from friends like "are you EVER going to have a wedding?" etc., and I just threaten them with eloping and they hush up.
Personally I like not having to be rushed...we're just taking a really laid back approach to all of it. Not in a hurry, just enjoying life and relaxing :)
I'm glad to not be alone in this arena. My FI and I got engaged last December and will have a 21 month engagement. We are both in grad school and hope to finish next May. I am also a huge crafter, so this helps me have the time to get it all in.... complete a dissertation and plan a DIY wedding.... FROM AFAR no less. We booked our ceremony site and reception site in the first 2 months of our engagement and it's taken me a month to finalize our Save the Dates. I'll start working on them and hope to get them out to our guest about 1 year before our wedding date. It will be a semi-destination wedding so we want to make sure to give our guests as much time as possible to save up and plan for a wedding in San Diego.
Ladies, I say get rolling as much as you can. Time is on our side so let's make use of it. You might not be able to book everyone righ tnow, but the research takes the longest anyways. We are the lucky one's when it comes to making sure we don't get ripped off by the wedding industry. The economy is down, but that's also a reason to lock in the deals while people are in need our deposit cash.
I also love getting a chance to be engaged!
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Hi ladies!
I'm having a long engagement as well. My honey & I are planning on getting married 11/27/10. Which is basically 2 yrs from when we got engaged.
It seems really far away right now, how ever the Mr. thinks its time to get the ball rolling and make some decisions.
I'm a slacker bride, and I am the type of person who researches EVERYTHING, so deciding stuff can be tough for me.
Good luck to everyone with their planning.
Hey,
We are definitely in the long engagement club, we got engaged 3 weeks ago on Wednesday and we are planning for a destination wedding on 8.9.10. The reasoning behind it is to save money and ensure guests have enough time to save their money to share our day with us.
We are in the same situation as you guys. My FI about fell over when I asked if we could wait to get married until after I finished grad school. I tried to explain that we'd be so busy that planning our wedding would take back burner to school, and I didn't want that to happen. Now we are 7 months into a 26 month engagement, and we are both so happy that we are waiting! School has been brutal and my time management has been stretched to the limits. Even besides school, I love having ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD to make a decision. Changing your mind 10 times? It's okay because there's so much time! I am loving it!
long engagements are fun ... gives you so much time to make everything as perfect as you want it to be! :)
Got engaged Valentine's day last year, getting married June 12, 2010...I think it's just the right amount of time...Good things come to those who wait...
I had a long engagement and I have HATED IT!! Time does go so fast but I had too much time. I feel I have spent 2 years planning a party-very frustrating. If I could suggest anything, do things in three spurts. 1. Book everything you can so you get your pick and you will know also have a good idea about the money and saving (if you are paying). In the next spurt pick your details and finish projects you can and then in the last spurt finish all the last minute details.
I also find some interesting dynamics in long engagements. My mom didn't care, because it was too far away, what I was doing up until 9 months before and she suddenly has an opinion on everything. I'm having to battle for all these plans I have made :(. Next my FI was hestitant about making decision and working on things so far ahead of time-2 years caused more tension than I like to admit. Be prepared about people not being as interested in your weddingthat seems so far away to them.
I'm about 4 months in to an 18-month engagement (wedding date is June 12, 2010, like happilyeverafta!) I do like that I have so much time to browse and daydream before I have to actually choose things, but I am getting anxious to start really booking! The ceremony has been booked for a while but most other things are sort of on hold while I am still abroad... but once I get back in June (with about a year left) I think I will feel like it's more real as I start to actually do things!
It felt like a long engagement at the beginning, but the first 4 months has gone pretty fast, and the wedding date is at the right time for us. I'm glad we got engaged when we did and 1.5 years feels about right to me!
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I got engaged in Oct of 07 and we are getting married in August this year- so what's that, 23 months? Wow. My best advice would be to wait til you're closer to the wedding to make decisions. I made a lot of decisions that I ended up taking back, if I could- and some that are costly change-of-minds. You think you've got it all figured out and then more inspiration hits you! Just take your time and enjoy thinking about it but don't get too bogged down in the details when you have so much time.
I need alittle bit of help
I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years 4 months and we talk about marriage quite abit ever since his cousin got engaged actualy. Hes come out with will you marry me several times and I dont know if he means it half the time I was just wondering if we should get married he always tells me he'll never leave my side, and these two years haven't been kind to us at all alot has happened. I am going to college in september for a two year course and its at the point I got him a ring and want to ask him but it would be a pro long engagment if he says yes untill im done school but I am just wondering if we've been together long enough too take that step.
Please could you help me
Our engagement is going to last 3.5 years! And we've been "promised" to each other for longer (2 more years), though we weren't planning our wedding then. =) We were focusing on getting through school! =D Now we have to focus on getting through university, but hey, it's summer right now, so hah!
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@blueyebabface: My fiance and I were dating for a little over a month before we started talking about marriage, he "proposed" to me for the first time 2-3 months in, and we went another 2 years before we became officially "engaged". Our engagement is going to last more than three years (until we're done university).
I would say, if you feel ready, DO IT. =) You've been together for over 2 years, most people would definitely consider that long enough. There's nothing wrong with a long engagement, and especially when you're attending school, it's helpful to have the flexibility when it comes to planning. Sometimes homework just gets in the way of booking a cake tasting!
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hey long engagement ladies, how are you hanging in there? Like LuckyinKY, I am not enjoying this loooonnng engagement. We have all of our large stuff booked and I want to start on the fun stuff now, but people keep telling me I "have time" and "not to do anything too soon." Ugh! I feel like the time is tick, tick, ticking by and I just want to be married already! I keep "jokingly" telling FI that we should just see what next available date all our venues and vendors have and move the wedding up! lol. if we were dare devils we probably would.
<font face="tahoma">@Jenniphyr: Thank you for your reply it helped alot, I made plans to take him out of the city for several days during the summer so I can ask him. So hopefully everything goes well ;)</font>
I'm in month 18 of a 21 month engagement! It's gone by really fast, though.
Hey girls! I'm on month 3 of our 19 month engagement. We decided to wait until Nov. 2010 because in September this year we'll be moving out of the country. I wanted to deal with the move first (and settle in) before planning the wedding. Although we know the venues, etc, there's really nothing else I can do until we move. It's really frustrating because I actually can't wait!
I just got engaged, and we're having an engagement of about 22 months. I don't really want to wait that long, but we're waiting until he's out of graduate school. It'll give us plenty of time to plan, save up some money and take time to plan the wedding. I guess the nice thing is that we get some time to enjoy our engagement and relax before we have to start really planning stuff. :)
I'm also in the long engagement club. We will have been engaged for 22 months by the time we get married. I've been working on all our DIY projects, especially the invitations. They have taken forever. The time will creep up, so I say just work your way through your to do list and continually get supplies when they're on sale.
I have been engaged since 2007!!!!!!!! We finally decided to buckle down and take the leap. We will be engaged 3 and a half years before we get married!!!
I'm so happy to finally start planning
Our engagement feels super long. I fell in love with a venue and our wedding date was their first opening.. So! June 2011 it is.
^_^;; 32 month engagement so far, and no wedding date set so no idea how much longer we will go.
The same week my Mr Crol proposed we had the very bad news of my father's passing. Within a month and half of the proposal we closed on our first home. So things kinda lined up that put a hold on marriage.
Once we do get married the wait will be well worth it. Sometimes its a little frustrating, I want to start planning! But, the wait has given me time to get lots of ideas ^_^
Im a long engagement bride! I always wanted a long engagement. This is one of the most fun and happy times in our lives. I like the fact that I have lots of time to enjoy it!
Sure, sometimes I just wanna get married already but when I think about how wonderful our day will be after all this built up anticipation, I realize it will be worth it.
It also gives us time to save up money and more time for me to get awesome ideas! yay so exciting
We are having a 25 month engagement. I didn't want it so long, but we pushed it back a year in order to save and pay as we go so there will be no debt from the wedding once it's over. I am enjoying the extra time for the DIY projects, and we nailed down most of our vendors at great rates!
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