Post # 1
It’s funny, people think that the difficult part of being in recovery and planning a wedding would be dealing with alcohol at the reception. That hasn’t been too difficult, save the “no, sparkling apple cider won’t work because it looks like alcoholic champagne and I don’t want myself or any of the other people in recovery getting their glasses mixed up” conversation.
What has been difficult is dealing with my obsessive, single-minded tendency to approach issues. Once I decide to do something, it’s hard for me to let it go or “moderate.” (as if moderation weren’t the most difficult thing in the world for me!).
I’m just wondering what other sober bees are going through. I have a couple friends in the rooms to talk to, but it would be nice to connect with some here.
Post # 3
hey ginnyc! i have been clean for… 3 years this june!! i still drink alcohol(i was fortunate enough to be able to reduce my alcoholism to just the occasional drink) but i haven’t touched a street drug or took a pill that wasn’t mine in three years. i commend you for being so strong on the not drinking(not easy to do) but you are for sure not the only recovered/recovering addict getting married! good luck to you and good job!
Post # 4
My issue wasn’t alcohol or prescription drugs… but that’s all I’ll say about that 😉
The June of my wedding will mark 5 years since I left a really bad situation and started my recovery, and sometimes it’s still hard.
I commend you girls for your strength!
Post # 5
I’m not personally, but my Mother is a (very recently) recovering alcoholic. I just wanted to say congrats & good luck to you all!
Post # 6
i’m in recovery… 6 1/2 months sober. the best part of the planning for us is the non alcoholic reception! talk about saving major dollars! i’ve honestly been trying to get sober for almost 2 years… so i had already let go of the “dead weight” friends… my current friends and my family support me in my recovery – so there has definitely been no awkwardness over our sober reception. but, we did intentionally plan a 3pm reception, so if anyone has to have a drink, they can find a local bar afterwards. my FH has never had a drink in his life… how lucky for me!?!?
anyone else in recovery ever need to vent wedding or otherwise, feel free to PM me.
Post # 7
I am in recovery as well. it has been about 3 years since i had a drink, about 4 years since i have taken any drugs and also i quit smoking about 5 years ago but has probably only been 3 years since i have had a cigarette.
I had stopped doing drugs and was just stopping drinking when i met my Fiance. he knows i did a lot of drugs and partied too much but i have never actually said i was addicted to any of the drugs or alcohol.
I am honestly not sure i was ever addicted…just something i did every day. i was able to quit on my own cold turkey…all of it (except it took stopping drinking to make me be able to fully stop smoking).
My mother and sister still have alcohol problems…it is really sad to watch them go through what i remember going through years ago. I just hope they can pull through like I did.
thanks for being brave and sharing this ladies. it kind of feels good to admit this. when i moved was kind of my turning point so no one in my new town knows of my past. (FI knows but he never witnessed it…it is different)
Post # 8
also, i would like to add that if anyone wants to talk please PM me, anytime!
Stay strong ladies!
Post # 9
Hey – congrats to all on your sobrieties!
I figured I’d pop in and offer encouragement. I’ll be sober 14 years in November. I’m getting married in September AND I’m turning 50 in October.
In many ways I’m glad I’m as old as am in planning a wedding – I think if I were younger (and not sober) I would be a mess. I’m still hung up a bit on what other people think – but I just keep plugging away.
And you are right – for me it has so little to do with booze. Yes – I get obsessed too – have spent days upon days obsessing about photographers and dresses. We decided to use flowered filled pitchers as centerpieces. I think I have looked at every pitcher available on the internet (excluding e-bay – but I looked at quite a few there also). I finally walked into Crate & Barrel and got them, because I knew if I didn’t it would be another gazillion hours looking around the internet.
You know, as I started to think about this thread it hit me that I was 36 when I got sober. I’m telling you – the time flies. I would look at people who were sober 2 years and think to myself – WOW – how did they do that?
You’ve been taught what to do when things get hairy – that’s why the program is so great – you can apply the tools you’ve learned to so many different situations. One Day at a Time, Live and Let Live, Turn it Over.
Yes, we are only sober for today – but one of my favorite concepts is sober references – you look back on your first Thanksgiving, Christmas, Birthday, wedding, breakup – whatever – and you can say to yourself – I’ve done that and I’ve done it sober.
Hopefully we’ll only have to PLAN one wedding in sobriety ……