(Closed) Any TEEN brides out there under 20?

posted 6 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
Member
2778 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’m not but my mom got married at 19 the first time she got married.  How old are you sweetie?  Have you been with your SO long?

Did they get you something shiny?? ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
Member
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’ll be 18 next month and Inot getting married next summer!!! (with no baby) hahaha

Post # 5
Member
1153 posts
Bumble bee

I’m 19.

This is all I have to say – if you feel like you have to explain your wedding to people, if you are embarassed or apologetic of your age, if you have to ask people whether you’re too young, you’re not ready.

If it feels natural, right, and logical – including the not-so-pretty details (financing, school, etc) – you’re ready and no one else’s opinions matter.

It also helps if your parents are supportive. Parents (and other close family members) see things we don’t, about ourselves and our men. Trust them. If they have no fears, that’s a big step forward. If they’re nervous, reluctant, or suspicious, that’s a big warning sign.

Stick to your guns. If you’re confident it’s the right thing to do, nothing anyone says really matters. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
Member
11352 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

@MyTeenWedding:  I certainly understand why you would be seeking advice from other young brides if you are of a similar age. That makes perfect sense.  However, I would like to encourage you, strongly, also to seek advice from some older brides and older, married women as well, since they may provide some potentially valuable additional advice to you that some younger brides may not yet be in a position to provide.

Post # 7
Member
524 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Brielle: I agree that advice about being married, etc. is wise to get from people older than her, but I also see why she might want specific advice about being engaged young from younger people–not marital advice, but more advice on navigating being engaged young, what to expect at her wedding from people’s reactions, what it’s like being married under 20, etc. ๐Ÿ™‚ (Not that I’m dissing your point at all: I agree! :D)

Post # 8
Member
3772 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@MyTeenWedding:  my parents got married when my Mom was 19. They’re still married today and have a very STRONG marriage. I think the thing is you have to realize, well everyone has to realize, that marraige takes work. And for those that tell you, well you’re going to change so much. My parents changed, and guess what, they changed together. Focus on the journey and not the differences you all have or the changes you will undergo. If you know your FI is the one, then he’s the one! Don’t let anyone talk you out of it because of your age! and if anyone say’s you’re too young, just ignore them. Because they are not you. They don’t know the relationship you and your FI have.

Post # 10
Member
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Please wait to get married.  Don’t break up, just wait to actually get married.  If you plan to commit yourself to him until death do you part, your union is not weakened by waiting to actually get married when you are in your 20s.  You will change SO MUCH in the next few years.  Hopefully together, but why not just grow together, and then get married when you can legally drink the bubbly.  Some teen marriages work beautifully, like the one above.  But most don’t.  The notion that there is a 50% divorce rate is actually wrong– for those who get married under 25, without a college degree, the chance of divorce is VERY HIGH, such that it skews it to 50% for the general population.  Take out that segment, and the Larry King/Elizabeth Taylor types (people who get married over and over again), and the divorce rate is actually pretty low.

Post # 11
Member
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

With all due respect, us getting married young does not mean we haven’t thought about it. We’ve taken all these things into account. I’ve known him for a long time and we’ve both already grown up, we have our own responsibilities. We know each Others flaws and we are prepared to handle them. We’re virgins, we don’t drink, we don’t go out and party, our version of a good time is a picnic with our church. I’d rather “grow up and change” with the love of my life than to wait to start my life with him until later. I’d rather be able to depend on him than to have to be on my own. These things have been thought of, but with God we can overcome the worldly problems. 

P.s. in the “good ol days” when marriages would last 50 or 60 or 70 some years…. The people got married at a very young age.

Post # 12
Member
11753 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@InLoveWithMyBestFriend:  P.s. in the “good ol days” when marriages would last 50 or 60 or 70 some years…. The people got married at a very young age.

That’s because divorce was much more of a faux pas then it is now.

Post # 13
Member
3000 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

No one can make the decision for you to get married now except for you. I will say that most people in our society will think it’s silly to get married so young (especially with the divorce rate being so high, especially for brides who get married younger), but it’s not always the case. My husband’s parents got married young. His mom was 19 and his dad was 21. They are still married today, 27 years later. I think they are the exception to this kind of situation, but it does happen that you KNOW you are meant to be at a young age.

Post # 14
Member
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MrsWBS:  People only get divorced when they get married for the wrong reasons. Which we aren’t. Our parents approve it becausethey can see the way we feel about each other, and know that we truly think of the other beyond ourselves. 

Post # 16
Member
309 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@InLoveWithMyBestFriend:  in the “good ol days” when marriages would last 50 or 60 or 70 some years…. The people got married at a very young age.

There’s a million reasons for that:

Divorce was much more frowned upon, people died much younger, the internet and all the distractions it holds didn’t exist, women didn’t work outside the home (so they didn’t have the same options of meeting someone else/ needed to be provided for)….

Also, people were much more mature at 18 in the 40’s and 50’s than today– most of these men served in the war.  The emotional maturity of most 20 year olds today is just not the same.

 

The topic ‘Any TEEN brides out there under 20?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors