(Closed) Any Thoughts About Renewing Vows

posted 5 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Hostess
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Dh and I plan to read our vows to one another each year on our anniversary. However, we just do it alone, the two of us in a quiet moment. I really like it because it reminds me that our marriage is ongoing, and while it’s subject to a lot of change (of course) it will continue to change, adapt, and provide the sense of stability and comfort that it always has. 

I honestly wouldn’t do a big vow renewal that often because I don’t think it really sits with the  way *I* envision my marriage. I love love LOVED my wedding, but I like that my vows are the same year after year. They don’t require me to dress up, and they don’t involve anyone other than DH and I. (We also got married without family because we wanted to enter marriage just focusing on us -not our parents, grandparents, siblings, etc). 

I guess I’d consider it at, say 20 years. But that’s also because basically no one in my family has managed to stay married for 20 years. haha

Post # 4
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We are planning a vow renewal in Iceland (where we met in real life) between the two of us, MAYBE a photographer if I can manage to convince DH.  ๐Ÿ™‚  

Post # 6
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@Old Hollywood:   Beautiful!  I haven’t really done too much thinking about what I’d like to wear, but I DO know that it won’t be my old wedding dress as it’s a few sizes too  big for me these days.  ๐Ÿ˜€  I’m definitely thinking of something completely different then what I had previously – so either form fitting long or a short cute dress.  Not sure if I’ll keep it white or not.  lol I have a couple years to decide though.  ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 7
Member
3689 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Everyone in DH’s family who has renewed their vows wound up getting a divorce.  I’m not touching that with a 50 foot pole.  

Post # 8
Member
1038 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I personally feel like it’s just the woman wanting to do it so she can relive her wedding day all over again and have that attention again.  I just don’t see the need for it.  You should mean your vows the first time you say them.  Why do you need to renew them?  And if you are wanting to do something with other people involved, just seems very attention grabby imo.  Why not just celebrate your anniversary with your husband privately and maybe read your vows together again? 

 

I could see doing a vow renewal after being married 20+ years or if you almost divorced as a couple and overcame that and your marriage strengthened cause of it.  But every 5 years…just seems a bit much imo personally.

Post # 9
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@nursemel:  You do it your way, I’ll do it mine.  I’ll thank you not to judge me for what my husband and I choose to do.

Post # 10
Member
3626 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I would love to do it again, maybe in 10 years with our kids (only) present. However, maybe it’s because we just got married, but DH thinks the idea of a vow renewal is silly and frivolous. I guess I have quite a bit of time to convince him otherwise!

Post # 11
Member
3626 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@nursemel:  One of my family members had a 10-year anniversary vow renewal “ceremony” on an island (forgot which one) with just DH, their son and a local priest-type person and it was beautiful. I don’t think she did it for just the attention. I think it was to re-affirm their love for each other and something sweet for their son to witness since he obviously wasn’t there for the first round.

Post # 12
Member
1038 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@dodgercpkl:  NEWSFLASH. People are entitled to their own opinions.  Quit being so sensitive to words on a computer screen.

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