Anybody else have a five year+ engagement?

posted 3 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
4884 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I did not have a long engagement, but a friend of mine did. They were saving, then thought about trying to buy a house, then didn’t, then finally started planning a wedding. It might not have been a full 5 years but it was every bit of 3. In her case, she just wasn’t genuinelly that interested in planning a wedding. She wasn’t in a rush to get married and it wasn’t a big push for her. 

If that works for you, then really, it’s no one else’s business or concern. I personally would never have a 5 year engagement (or even an engagement over a year). I would elope or plan a ceremony with just our immediate family. Then again, I’ve never seen the point in long engagement’s. To me, getting engaged means you’re ready to actively start planning a wedding and are ready to get married. I never understood the girls who got engaged early in college and said “but we’re waiting until we graduate to get married”. Okay, that’s good, but then what was the point in getting engaged if you weren’t actually ready to get married? 

Obviously life happens, and there are always circumstances you can’t control, so in the end, it really should only matter to you and your FI.

Post # 5
Member
392 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Jacqui90:  finances wise, we are in the same boat. Our whole life has been dictated by money!! So, were still living apart and getting married in June. FI is working like crazy and putting everything into savings, by May we will have enough in savings for 4 months worth of rent. For the rest of the summer, any money he gets will supplement savings and hopefull he’ll find a teaching job for fall. If not, I ask for more student loan money. I know it sucks, but we made all the right descisions by going to college and staying with our parents as long as possible to save $$. We’re just going to wing it now lol. Can you apply for temporary government help? We are going to be in the situation that welfare and food stamps are for, temporary situations. I don’t know anything about Australia, but maybe do some research and see what you can find to help you guys out? 

Post # 7
Member
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

We’re also in Australia (Sydney) and didn’t have money to move out… so we got married anyway and we moved into his parents instead. So now we’re a married couple living with his parents/my in-laws 😛

it isn’t so bad! is that an option for you guys?

i work full-time but my hubby is a student and we’re saving for a house, didn’t want all our money to go to rent

Post # 8
Member
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

p.s. sorry to hear about your health issues!

Post # 11
Member
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@Jacqui90:  Hehe fair enough, it’s not everybody’s cup of tea. Does your FI work full-time?

Post # 13
Member
32 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2015

The night before we went on a vacation my Fiancé suggested movie night and he picked the movie The Five Year Engagement. It was my first time seeing it and I loved it. The next day we went to Catalina Islands and he proposed. That was September 2012. We are dual military and Im also a graduate student. My Fiancé knew that we had a tough and arduous schedule pending and I suppose that he acclimated me to the long engagement by having us watch the movie. We chose our date early on and I can FINALLY say that we are getting married ‘next’ year. In retrospect the time has gone by fast but it was daunting to begin with. Of course I want to get married and celebrate right away… The arduous nature of the military just makes it hard.

Whenever I get weary or anxious or have a tough day I literally imagine myself at one end of the aisle and him at the other and I swear it brings the biggest smile to my face. All of this hard work and waiting will pay  tremendous dividends in the end.  Its hard to see my friends get engaged and married after/before us. Our time is coming and so is yours! Daydream away 🙂

 

Imagine exchanging vows, your first dance, that first look, his smile when he sees you at the other end of the aisle, what song you will walk to…. And take comfort in the fact that its coming and will be a beautiful reward for all of your patience and longsuffering 

 

 

 

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors