Anybody here with spender's remorse?

posted 3 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
8680 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Sometimes, but I really try to think long and hard before making a large purchase.

Even with wedding stuff! I’d love to have those $600 shoes encrusted with rhinestones, but that’s nearly the amount we are spending on FOOD alone!

I just can’t do it.


Post # 4
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I think it is important before a purchase to figure out what really matters when it comes to that good/service. Sometimes the answer to that will mean you spend and spend you should. Sometimes the answer will lead you to save and you’d be foolish not to. 

I wanted a gold ring to be my engegment/wedding ring. We could spend 100 bucks and get a gold band but design and quality craftsmanship were important. We happily dropped 2k+ without a stitch of regret. 

My wedding dress? I wanted it to look pretty and photograph well. Got that sucker for 500 bucks. 

it isn’t always about not spending but about spending consciously and in keeping with your priorities. 

that said…. 

If your spending on the wedding is threatening your financial stability, time for a difficult talk. 

Post # 5
2087 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@nocleverbeepun:  +1 It’s about priorities. Invitations are not high on my priorities, neither are favours. So I’m DIYing the invitations and not having favours. Rings and photography were important to me so we splurged. I am considering spending quite a lot on my wedding day jewellery but only because I know I will 100% re-wear them. I’m thinking about the cost per wear! For example, I can’t see my wearing pearl studs IRL so if I choose that on my wedding day I won’t spend money getting the real thing. If I get the gold dangly ones I know I will re-wear so I am thinking about getting them made. 

Post # 6
1988 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

@vegas:  Can you return/back out of anything or is it too late to change your mind? 

If it’s too late to change your mind, try looking at it this way. Ring: 8k is a lot of money BUT when you think about cost-per-wear, it becomes a lot more acceptable! It’s something you’ll hopefully be wearing for the rest of your life! You wouldn’t feel bad if you spent 8k on a car that yu would drive for 10 years, right? A ring will last even longer. 

Dress: Yes, $1400 is a lot of money for something you’ll only wear once. BUT it’s a dress that will be seen in all the really important pictures that you’ll be showing to your grandchildren and great-grandchildren when you’re 85, right? When you think about it, a wedding is never the most cost-effective thing but that’s true for most celebrations. You don’t NEED them, they’re costly, but they are the salt of life. My mother always says that a family that doesn’t celebrate together has a hard time staying together. Oh, and a wedding dress is a highly resellable item! I think you could easily sell yours for about $800 – problem solved! 

Venue: This one is trickier but again, think of all the amazing pictures you’ll get to look at for the rest of you life and all the gorgeous memories tied to your beautiful place. If it’s too late to change your mind about your venue, try finding as many positive sides to it as you possibly can. When you’ve already bought something you can’t return, there’s no use crying over it – enjoy it and let it give you pleasure. 

I hope that helps. It’s how I deal with my own buyer’s remorse – yes, I have it too, but mostly over shoes! lol


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