Post # 1
So Fiance and I already have 2 daughters together, they have his last name. We’re getting married this September and I don’t want to change my last name. Fiance is ok with this although he has expressed that he would like it if I changed my last name and that people might think it’s weird that I have a different last name than my husband and 2 daughters. But I really want to keep my last name. Anyone else having this problem?
Post # 3
i don’t plan on changing my name. i am an encore bride and kept my name before too. it’s just who i am.
my fi doesn’t care. he says he is marrying me, not my name.
Post # 4
kind of similar, but not exactly
My mom did take my step fathers name, but her kids (me) had a different name so for school purposes she signed her name hyphenated so it wouldnt be so confusing for teachers and school docs. Legally though her name was different than ours due to her new marriage.
Post # 5
I’m keeping mine for both professional and personal reasons. He can call me “Mrs. FI” as a pet name. 🙂 And no one is going to think it’s weird if you have a different name — folks have blended families, it’s no big.
Post # 6
Darling Husband desperately wants me to change my name. If I do change it it won’t be until after my passport expires in 2016
Post # 7
I did not change my name and have not had a single regret. It was mostly for professional reasons, but I am personally very attached to it as well. In our personal life, if I get Mrs. Darling Husband, I won’t correct people. At work, I just said I wasn’t changing and everything has stayed the same.
The one time Darling Husband gave me a bit of grief over it, I told him if it meant so much to him, he could change it for me. I tossed my wallet over. He took one look and started his back-peddle.
Our kids will have my name as a second middle name with DH’s last name.
Post # 8
I’m not changing my name. Fiance doesn’t care what I do, and I really don’t like how my name sounds with his last name, so I’m just keeping mine.
I’m so looking forward to not having the “name change” paperwork and hassle! I just had to renew my passport two weeks ago, so I’m glad I had already decided cuz I’m not paying another $160 to have to renew it again just to change my name come December.
Good luck with whatever you decide!
Post # 9
The only reason I wouldnt change mine was for professional reasons, even though I dislike my last name. What is the reason for you not wanting to change yours? THAT is the important part of this.
Post # 10
I don’t think I’m going to, especially after reading all your comments, glad I’m not the only one; even though it feels like it sometimes! All my friends and some family keep wondering why I’m not changing it and think it’s actually rude of me not to!
The reason I don’t want to is for personal reasons, I guess. I’m kind of attached to it. I can’t see myself having another name and I also don’t like the way my name sounds with FI’s last name. But more that it’s MY name, if that makes sense? I like it and don’t think I should have to change it, it won’t make us any less of a couple and it won’t make the marriage any less of a commitment.
I didn’t meet my father until I was about 16, so I have my mom’s and grandparents’ last name. My grandfather was the only real father figure I had in my life and for that I think I want to keep the same last name as him.
Post # 11
I’m not changing my last name… the funny thing is that growing up, I always assumed I’d one day get married and take my future husband’s name. Now that I’m in that position, I cannot imagine having to give-up a part of my identity so that I can be known as Mrs. Darling Husband… I get the romance of it, but I’m not living a fairy tale here.
Post # 12
I’m not and Fiance is cool with it. Some of my family think its odd, some think its awesome. I can only see one or two people on FI’s side having an actual problem with it.
Post # 13
lol – I love how so many of us are holding off for passport reasons. I’m a dual citizen so I totally get it!!
I’ve struggled with the name change. I don’t love my last name, but my dad was an only child, his dad immigrated from Sweden and passed away, and my dad has also passed away. It’s only my sister and I, so we won’t have anyone to carry on our family name. So I feel kind of guilty about this.
Fiance doesn’t care at all whether I change or not, but he’s adamant that our kids have his last name. I don’t particularly think either of us have great last names, and they are definitely non-hyphenable.
I don’t know what I’m going to do. For the bride & groom announcement we’re just having them announce us by first and last name. If I do change, it won’t be till my passports expire 😉
I’ll probably consider it more carefully when we’re closer to being ready to have kids in a few years.
Post # 14
@millielue: I totally understand your reasoning! Just wondering, if you didnt want to be a member of your FI’s family through his last name that might be a problem 😛 I actually dont really think my SO’s last name sounds good with my name either.. don’t have to worry about that *yet* but there definitely isn’t anything wrong with keeping your name. It is YOUR name afterall.. and the tratidion is somewhat dated.