Anyone else afraid their wedding will suck?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Are you afraid your wedding will suck?
    Yep - have the same nightmares as you : (46 votes)
    58 %
    Nope - my wedding will rock : (9 votes)
    11 %
    somewhere in the middle on this : (25 votes)
    31 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1095 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @MsGinkgo:  I wasn’t worried about this but my DH was. In French and island culture (he’s from Mauritius) the party is the most important part of the wedding and lasts all night. He had been to one wedding in the UK which was on a Sunday evening in a place far too big for the number of guests. The atmosphere was pretty non existant and he was worried ours would be like that, especailly as we only had 40 guests. 

    BUT we had the best wedding, we were in a small venue so even though there were no so many people the dance floor looked packed and everyone had a fab time. He admitted afterwards that he had been pleasantly surprised!

    I’m sure your wedding will be fab, try not to worry!

    Post # 4
    Member
    25 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Terrified!

    Post # 5
    Member
    1896 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    @MsGinkgo:  Not exactly. I have dreams that my wedding is happening AT THIS VERY MOMENT meaning whatever I haven’t gotten checked off the list is still not done at the wedding. That is my frequent dream.

    Last night was different. I had a dream that for some reason, my wedding was relocated to Japan. There was no luxorious spa bathroom to shower and get ready in- just a hole in the ground toilet and a very tiny shower stall.

    Then, I had forgotten to remind/ check in with my hair and makeup girls and they didn’t show up, so I had to go be the bride with unstyled hair and my very minimal day makeup. I was horrified.  

    Another thing to add to my list— checking in with hair/makeup girls RIGHT before the wedding LOL.

    Post # 6
    Member
    965 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    My most recent wedding nightmare was about my FI seeing me before the wedding, which is funny, because we are doing a first look, but he saw me before the first look and I was crying and anxious and it was not fun.

    My real fear is that my FI is going to be running late. He has no sense of time and niether do his parents. I fear that they are going to be an hour late (per their usual) and everything is going to run late or be rushed the rest of the day.

    Post # 7
    Member
    5432 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014 - Ontario, Canada ♥ EDD- April 2016

    I’m nervous that people will think our wedding is weird, because we’re having an outdoor morning wedding and a champagne and cake lunch/afternoon reception instead of a church wedding and then party at a community/legion hall which is what’s typical in our area. I’m also nervous that everything will go by really fast or everything will seem really surreal and I won’t be able to appreciate or remember everything. By having a slower paced morning/afternoon reception with around 60 people we are trying to avoid this, but it’ll probably still happen to some degree. I’m just afraid that after 2 1/2 years of planning, I’ll be too busy or pulled in too many directions to enjoy it and really take it all in 🙁

    Post # 8
    Member
    2419 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I never had those fears in reality. However, it’s absolutely normal to have this sort of dream because I think that somewhere in most of our sub-consciences is a level of insecurity. I had the most awful dream which involved my DH being taken into hospital on the morning of the wedding and me turning up beside his bed insisting that the nurses married us!

    However, of all the many weddings I’ve attended, I could count the slightly dud ones on the fingers of one hand. In each case, it looked like considerable effort had gone into the less successful elements of them too! Like terrible music, awful food and a complete disinterest in the comfort of guests.  

     

    Your wedding will be great! Just keep reminding yourself of this fact!

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    1690 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Before my wedding i was a bit worried (not all the time, only sometimes) that everything wouldn’t come together like I had planned in my head. I planned everything mostly by myself, and we had a heavily themed wedding, and I really wanted to make sure that cam across in a non-cheesy way. You know how you plan individual things (decor, food, activities, etc), but it’s hard to visualize it all together, so that can be a bit tough. 

    Anyway, happy to say it worked out great. Nothing to stress over.

    Post # 10
    Member
    6028 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I was so afraid people were going to think it sucked. I was most afraid that no one would dance! I’ve been to so many weddings where it was only the bride and bridesmaids dancing and I felt so bad. However, everyone had a great time and the dance floor was packed the whole time!! Just make sure the DJ plays really good music! Make sure he takes requests from guests too (as long as they’re reasonable). I feel like the weddings I went to where no one danced was because the DJ wasn’t very good and played boring music.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1167 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @Andthepupmakes3:  This is SO my nightmare!

    I have three recurring dreams:

    The wedding is happening and Im late, nothing is done, I don’t have my dress, I have no hair or makeup people and no time to do it. There is also no car, I can;t seem to find my girls, everything is wrong yet everyone else is done up and gorgeous. I rush around and I bawl because there is nothing I can do and I am going to my wedding in my PJs or sweats, with my hair thown in a messy ponytail (I just had my hair cut to a long bob, so now my dream features a messy mop of hair instead) and I had to call a CAB. I then get to the location and there are none of my decorations, nothing!

    The second is a reception dream: I get to the reception and some people are missing. Our speeches go really bad (we had just FIs dad and my dad make 1 min each stumbled speeches for our E-party, it was a little embarassing 🙁 ) Then as soon as the cake is out people start leaving. Soon, there are like 20 people left, and no one wants to dance and everyone looks like they are having a crap time. I pull my MOH into the bridal bathroom with me and bawl my eyes out. She calms me down and we go back out to find there is FI, me, MOH by my side, my mum and FI’s parents. Everyone else left. MOH pulls up some chairs and booze and we sit and drink to hell while I bawl my eyes out.

    The last is weird, and very unlikely – I wake up to have slept through till just after the ceremony time! I speed to the ceremony site and its all packed up, I get to the receptio (PJ’s, messy hair and everything) to find its going on like normal just with no bride. Soooo weird!!

     

    Hey, at least my subconscious even realises those closest to us will be there to console my bawling face if everything goes wrong! 😀

    Post # 12
    Member
    114 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    Rest assured, it takes A LOT to make a wedding suck. The only weddings I can think of that were truly sucky were ones where all the guests were super uncomfortable, like having to sit outside shivering in a thunderstorm. These fears are pretty normal. I had all the nightmares you can possibly think of. I was even really sick on my wedding day and tons of things went wrong/just didn’t get done, but my wedding STILL didn’t suck. (I have it on good authority from a few brutally-honest friends and relatives.) So don’t worry! You can’t really do anything about the nightmares, but as long as you plan for the comfort of your guests I seriously doubt anyone will leave your wedding and go, “Wow, that was lame!”

    Post # 13
    Hostess
    30315 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I was worried, but I promise you everything came out fabulous! Best day ever. 🙂  If you need help going through details or thinking about whatever wedding related, that’s what we’re here for!! 😀

    Post # 14
    Member
    3777 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    I totally had those moments, even wrote a post on here about feeling like my wedding was too boring, too plain, etc. Trust me, everything will be great!!

    Post # 15
    Member
    1327 posts
    Bumble bee

    @MsGinkgo:  Nope!  Just because the whole point of the wedding is to marry the man that I love, and it will happen regardless of weather, how the venue looks, and any other what-ifs.  (Although now that I’ve read about @Steampunkbride: ‘s dream I’m going to be paranoid about our safety! :S)

    If anything, I share @sugarpea: ‘s worry about not being able to soak in/enjoy the day.  But from going to the few weddings I’ve been to, I find that it’s really important to either have a wedding planner (which I won’t have) or a trusted friend/family member kind of be your day of coordinator.  If you have someone reliable to make sure (all the controllable) things are in place, on time, and happening as they should, it will take a huge load off your shoulders.  I’m not sure who mine will be yet, but whoever it is will get a big appreciation gift from me. 🙂  

    Post # 16
    Member
    172 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    @MsGinkgo:  All.the.time. I worry that no one will come, that they will leave before the reception is over, that the rooms won’t look pretty, that all these things will go wrong.. 25% of the time these worries are in the form of nightmares, but 75% it’s real worrying! But I calm myself down by reminding myself that I’ll remember our marriage license and we will get married and everything else won’t matter as much. 

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