Anyone else always have "something" to deal with?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

That sucks! My FI does stuff to annoy me all the time! 

 

Maybe not going to his rescue with help relieve the stress a little bit? I know I got to the point when I was enough is enough… My FI is an adult… If he breaks something he can fix it kinda thing… That way unless it immediately right in this second effects me I don’t have to let it stress me out 

Post # 4
Member
416 posts
Helper bee

That sounds like having an inconsiderate teenager rather than a future spouse.

Post # 6
Member
529 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Awwww I felt so sad when I read the pizza coment 🙁

 

Post # 7
Member
1021 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@atacrossroads:  +1

my FI does not stress me out, he relieves my stress by handling what I cannot.

Post # 8
Member
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I would let him start experiencing the consequences then…. Hide your laptop… Make him find the money to fix his own…. If you stop cleaning up and fixing his mistakes then he will eventually learn to be an adult…. If you keep coddling him he will end up driving you bonkers! 

Post # 9
Member
3693 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

First off, replacing the screen on a laptop is cheap if you can do it yourself. I just asked my husband how much it cost for him to replace my screen last year and he thought it was $30-50. I think you can follow step-by-step instructions and it’s not too hard. If it’s just a small crack, the screen probably won’t have to be replaced at all.

Beyond that, he sounds kind of clueless and immature. I’m assuming you’re both adults — you aren’t responsible for him, you’re not his mother or his babysitter.

Post # 10
Member
6026 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

+1 to the PP who say the SO sounds pretty immature. I’d expect an 8-year-old to shove a Nintendo stylus in his ear, not a full-grown man. It sounds like he’s kind of clueless and used to other people (you now; probably his mom before that) fixing things for him. Let him solve his own problems for a while; either he’ll grow up, or you’ll discover you’ve got a man-child on your hands. And some women actually like that. Really there’s nothing wrong with being the “fixer” in a relationship, so long as you know what you’re getting yourself into. 

Post # 11
Member
6644 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I agree with the PP, let him worry about HIS mistakes and quit stressing yourself out. He is an adult, he broke HIS laptop HE can pay for repairing it and not use yours.  You need a back bone and start putting your foot down on stuff. Quit acting like his mother and let him figure stuff out on his own

Post # 13
Member
968 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yikes! Is he 10?

I don’t think I could deal with such immaturity and inconsideration.

 

Post # 14
Member
4896 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Wow, am I ever feeling fortunate right now.  My Dh is the most resourceful person I know.  He’s a problem solver by nature.  He makes my life much less stressful, not more so.

I don’t think I could handle the never ending traumas.

Post # 15
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Im sorry he really does sound like a child.  Some things he can’t help like his hours being but, but wtf the stick in his ear?

Also, if the beer and pizza are big treats for you guys I don’t understand his thought process when he found them in the fridge. It’s not like it appeared out of thing air, why would he think he should have it all with his friend?

Post # 16
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I know what you mean! There have been times where FI knows I was stressed and it was almost like he was screwing up just to mess with me. I had a job interview once and got the call that he was in emerge with a broken wrist! I was like seriously, of all days to break a wrist? He wasn’t even doing anything important, he tripped over the kitchen chair leg and landed on it very wrong…

I do disagree with many of the above posters. It really just sounds like he has shitty luck, not that he is an immature child! 

He maybe should focus on being more careful and cautious as well as picking the right time to reveal things to you. For ex. he shouldn’t call and tell you his shifts are cut when he knows you are getting ready to go back to school. He should’ve first looked around and then told you when he may have a solution ready.

PS. When I was younger I was very guilty of sticking those things in my ear – excellent scratchers for that itch you just can’t scratch! If I still owned one I’d probably have done the same by now!

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