Anyone else dealing with disapproving family/parents?

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
212 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013


mine isn’t the same by any means- but it was awkward.

my now in laws are awkward southern-ish people who don’t travel to ‘big cities’ or drive in them…they arrived 24 hours before the wedding, refused to rent a car and never said good bye…

however they are good people. I’ve learned to accept that just because they’re this way doesn’t mean they hate me or hate the decision my husband made it’s just their way of living- you need to find it in your heart to remove the blame they are placing on your SO and move it to them being non-changing. If they aren’t going to bend then explain to them that you and him will visit when you can, but you do want to marry this person and that’s how it I know that’s easier said than done- but WV to Chicago isn’t much different than the canada to colorado stretch- they are people from the hills who had mad ‘hill pride’ and even though I have been nice and they do like me- i’m still a ‘city’ girl and they still don’t know what to do with me.

sorry this is a ramble, but i just wanted you to know that we all have strained relationships with either our parents or our inlaws during the process.

even my mom who i figured would be 110% in didn’t step her game up until 4 weeks before the wedding, mainly because my dad died 7 years ago she was being super avoidant, I had to have a hardcore almost mean at times yell fest with her to get it through her head that I at 32 years old still need my mom.



Post # 5
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

YES!  Nothing close to how disappointing I’m sure your situation is though.  I don’t think I could deal if my parents weren’t excited.

FMIL is very upset that we’re going to rent a beach house to get married on the beach in Florida next fall.  We live in the Washington, DC area and both of our parents live in Ohio – FMIL thought for sure we would come back to Ohio to get married. 

I don’t think there’s much I can do to make her happier about the situation.  It’s not Ohio, so it’s not good enough.

She made a comment last weekend while we were home discussing wedding budget stuff that I shouldn’t have a wedding dress, since it’ll look “too out of place” on the beach.  Guess who’s going wedding dress shopping with me in a few weeks, at the first appointment I’ll have to try on dresses ever?

Post # 6
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

I dealt with inlaws that hated me. period. and my father didn’t approve of my relationship, and i didnt listen, i should have, because now im divorced, my father and his parents were right, we shouldn’t of gotten married.


how i dealt with it? i didn’t t was a lot of fighting and rude comments and hurtful things being said, ignoring, and cold shoulders and then the fake smiles and hugs. ugh. i just grinned and tried to bear it, but honestly it’s one of the most difficut things to deal with.


i would have a nice talk with your family and explain how you feel..

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