(Closed) anyone else dreading the “FINALLY” comments??

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
2714 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

FI and I were together for over 5 years before we got engaged. Honestly, I got more of it before we were engaged than after. “What’s taking him so long?”, “Are you guys ever going to get married?”, etc.

Once we actually got engaged, those type of comments completely stopped! It was nothing but congrats and well wishes once we were “finally” engaged. Try not to worry too much about it! 🙂

Post # 4
Member
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

We dated for 4 years and lived together for 3 before we got engaged.  Honestly, no one said anything about that, unless they said it behind our backs 😉

Post # 5
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

We dated for 6 years and lived together for 4.5 before we got engaged. We didn’t get a single comment like that – to our faces, at least!

Post # 6
Member
1928 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

We were together 5 1/2 years before we got engaged. Like TinyTina, we received them before we got engaged. The only person that said anything was my Brother. when I called to tell him he yelled “It’s about frickin time”, it was actually funny and it didn’t upset me one bit.

Don’t worry about it, everything will be perfect.

Post # 7
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

We were together for more than 5 years by the time we were engaged and the “finally” comments didn’t phase me at all (given, they were only from my close friends who knew that I was dying to get engaged). The way I see it, “finally” is a heck of a lot better than “that was quick”. 🙂

Post # 8
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

No one said ‘finally’ to our faces, but at the same time we really didn’t surprise anyone wiht our engagement announcement which was still kind of disappointing. We got a lot of ‘Oh that’s great!’ responses, not any surprise or shock. And we had only been dating 1.5 years!

Post # 9
Member
413 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@ms.oregon.state: Yes!!!! Except I’m probably going to hear more of “Well it’s about F-ing time!” from my friends. I’ll hear “FINALLY!” from family.

It’ll be upsetting, but I’d like to see them in my shoes. Just for one day.

Gwen.

Post # 10
Member
3801 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

FI and I were only together 2 years before he proposed, and when we put it on facebook, the first comment I got was “Finally!” from a girl that notoriously stalks facebook for relationship information and has a running tally on her page of couples she knows that are engaged. I think it was a way to pressure her own boyfriend, who dumped her shortly after this.

I was so.freaking.annoyed. It’s noone’s business how long or short it takes to get engaged, except for the couple! My FI wound up writing something snarky back to the girl, and it started a long commentary about how rude she is and I finally just deleted the comment. It makes me furious when people write that. It’s just one word, but the meaning is SO RUDE.

Post # 11
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee

It’s better than the ‘so soon?’ comments .. imo! lol

FI was divorced only for a few months before asking me to marry him but in Quebec you must be legally separated for one full calendar year before getting the gavel dropped on the situation so really he had been divorced for over a year.  But his family lives in a different city so to them a year in his life is a month.. ya know?

Post # 12
Member
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

My experience was the samy as TinyTina and LetsGoPens – we heard comments all the time before the proposal (we were together 6 years), but not really after. Everyone was just congratulating us. I think once you’re engaged people get over the fact that it took a while…

Now all my friends who said I was crazy for sticking around for so long know why I did.

Post # 13
Member
5273 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

We had been together for 5 years before we got engaged, and I did have a few people say things like “its about time.”

I didn’t respond to that – he propsed when we were both ready, and there is nothing wrong with couples that want to take the time to develop a relationship before getting married, and def not something we should ever be ashamed of or have to justify to others.

Post # 14
Member
928 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

FH and I were together for 9 years and living together for 3 before we were engaged a few months ago. We really didn’t hear anything like that after the engagement. I think the before comments (i.e what are you guys waiting for?) were a billion percent more annoying than the finally comments.

If someone did say something snarky I must have completely ignored it. Being in the fluffy pink bubble of newly-engagedness bliss kinda does that to me…

Post # 15
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I got plenty of those!! We’d been dating for 8 years when he proposed, living together for 2, and we’ve already had our 10-year anniversary (we’re getting married in 3 months).

Don’t let it phase you! The way I’ve looked at it is … I know plenty of people who wish they’d waited longer before getting married (I have friends who are my age, 30, and already divorced), but I don’t really know anyone who really regrets the waiting.

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