Anyone else excited for the marriage, but not the wedding?

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
1765 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

mrsgarkenzie:  I understand where your coming from….ours will be significantly bigger….but we are paying for it ourselves….every single penny is from our pockets….and what I have told BOTH sets of parents is this “we are paying for it…so if you want extra people you either need to help pay or understand that we can not afford the extra people.”  usually that helps soothe things….15 people NEITHER Of you know to a very small intimate wedding is weird….why don’t you tell your FILs that you just want a small wedding with the agreed upon guests and that either they help pay for the wedding or they can throw on another date a small get together for the people they want as a like congrats party….but it is YOUR AND YOUR FIANCEs wedding not his parents….hopefully they understand…just make sure your fiancé is onboard with it….but seriously people usually stop demanding adds to the guest book, and additions when asked to open their pocket books….just saying… sounds bad to say it to people but it is the only way to not be a door mat….15 people at a 100person wedding maybe but for such a small wedding just overwhelming….im sorry your stressed, but if you and your FI sit down and level with is parents hopefully they will understand….

ok lets see if my second paragraph will show up again….

It is soo wrong for your FFIL to use that against you guys….but again you guys need to be a united front and tell him that is not appropriate…..nor is it a sentiment you want associated with the wedding…..your FI Needs to help you out here….

as far as the wedding we are going to end up with probably 130 people and I am freaking out…I DISPISE being in front of lots of people….and I turn beat red I fidget and stammer with my speech….my dream wedding before I met FI (and of course fell in LOVE with his aunts, uncles and cousins….from this massive, warm, loving family)….was 20 people (including us and a preacher) on a beach at sunset….very low key and simple….like sundress, khakis and a bbq simple….(perfection in my opinion)….but here I am I am not looking that forward to the actual wedding…just being my fiancés wife….finally….I just remind myself that I agreed to this….I am 99% sure I will have fun and the only parts that make me uncomfortable will be over in minutes and everyone says I will be soo focused on FI and the moment that I wont notice….but paying that much money does make it hard…but we are softies and the extra people are people WE want there because we love them….and figure after 7 years of waiting to see us get married what the heck….

but seriously hun good luck…and make sure you and your FI stay on the same page (that is the ONLY way my FI and I are not having a probably 300 person wedding if we invited everyone…..that and asking people to pony up money when they want extra guests…..but it makes it easier since we are unified they cant say of….your FI said its ok I just wanted to make sure xx is on the list….we both know where we are drawing lines)

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 5 months ago by  Soonerbee07. Reason: second paragraph didnt show up... :(
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