Anyone else hate the term "Boyfriend/Girlfriend"?

posted 2 years ago in Waiting
Member
973 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

What would you rather him say? What would you like to be called?

Member
3478 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I blew up at him about it in June. I hated being a girlfriend. I asked him if he wanted me to act like just a girlfriend, he said “no”. Anyway, now is the time where is actually getting financially able to pay for the symbol of our commitment, yet yesterday he introduced me as his girlfriend, but it my head it sounded like “this is my Fi-Girlfriend…”. I hate it. I have just started calling him my Spouce, Hubby Bear, or when we are infront of our cat, Papa.

Member
1081 posts
Bumble bee

We say boyfriend/girlfriend because it’s what we are and I don’t feel right saying spouse, partner, etc. but I just wish we were husband/wife already. That’s what it feels like we are! The one thing I don’t like saying is “I live with my boyfriend”, we’re 28 and 37, own a home, both have professional careers, and saying that just makes me feel like I’m 19 again.

Member
3668 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I just have to say I never called DH my “fiance.” I called him my BF until we were married – I hated to say “fiance”!

Member
4070 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I hear you. I hate calling him “boyfriend” too (although it has nothing to do with age or how long we’ve been together). The term just seems too casual, like he could be my boyfriend today, and tomorrow I could be on to a new guy.

Okay, maybe it does have somewhat to do with age, but in a different way. I am young, so most people around me are in casual dating relationships and not serious partnerships. By saying “boyfriend” it’s like I get lumped into the former group.

Which is why on here I refer to him as my SO. And most everyone I speak to knows him, so I just refer to him by his first name and avoid the boyfriend term entirely.

Member
9458 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

DH and I were in our mid 40s when we met, and I agree that, at least to some people, it may sound a bit silly to say “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” at that age. 

We only dated in person (we were introduced online) for five months before we became engaged and started using fiance/fiancee (sorry, I don’t know how to make the accent marks), but I don’t really recall using the “boyfriend” word much, if at all. I just referred to him by his first name or as the guy I was dating. 

I know DH referred to me as his girlfriend at least once, when he decided to tell some people that he had finally met someone! When one of the older ladies at church (DH is the pastor) complimented him on the tie he was wearing, he surprised her and a few others within earshot by saying, “Thanks! My girlfriend gave it to me!” Of course, everyone who overheard was extremely happy for him! :)

Member
113 posts
Blushing bee

I hate boyfriend too.. It always reminds me of that scene in My Girl : “.. well, he was a boy.. and he was my friend..??..”

Member
5730 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

I thought boyfriend was an approprite term for my DH until we were engaged. We were together for 3 years, and we were 24 when we became engaged.

I think the trouble people have with the term “boyfriend” is that it gives no indication of commitment. “Boyfriend” could indicate anything from a 2 week long relationship to a 10+ year long relationship. Obviously “fiance” and “husband” suggest a much stronger commitment. The honest truth is that boyfriend is still, technically, appropriate even after 7 years, as long as you are not engaged or married.

If it’s bothering you, ask your SO if he wouldn’t mind not using that term. 

Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee

I hate girlfriend/boyfriend because I just feel like we are so much more. Ugh.

Member
601 posts
Busy bee

I hate that term too!!!!! Goodness gracious.  But what is even more interesting is that I also dont like to say the word ‘Fiancé‘.lol  Weird, I know.  I just call him my man.  He has proposed officially but in the process of getting the ring which he said I should have before the end of the year so he calls me his Fiancé

Member
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Before we were engaged I also hated the term, but we used it because that is what we were, boyfriend/girlfriend. We were not fiances yet, so I didn’t want to be called one until I was engaged.

Member
601 posts
Busy bee

@Brielle:  He is also a Pastor.  It’s been an interesting experience to say the least.:)

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