Anyone else lose a parent and then decide to TTC?

posted 3 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
160 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@MRS-K:  We were TTC before I lost my dad suddenly in July, but I definitely felt the same sense of urgency with living every moment and just going for it as it sounds like you do.  I am so sad my dad won’t be able to meet my baby, but he lived a long and healthy life up until the point that he passed away, so I’m just thankful for those moments we spent together and am excited to share a similar loving family experience with my baby when he/she arrives.  I don’t think the urgency of getting on with life is specific to TTC though, just an urgency to live every moment of life to it’s fullest since you never know what’s around the corner!

Post # 4
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - backyard in the woods

My mom’s sudden death (at age 56!) was one of the reasons we didn’t wait to TTC after our wedding. I decided not to get my PhD as previuosly planned and we decided to start a family instead. I always felt like I had plenty of time ‘later’, but losing her so suddenly made me realize that isn’t true and I decided to start ‘living’, instead of planning to live later. That’s not to say that getting a PhD isn’t living, or that children are neccessary to have a full life, but to me having kids was more important.

Post # 5
Member
4778 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

While it wasn’t recently April will be 10 years for my mom and 6 years for my dad. My mom was 43 and my dad was 48. My boyfriends mom also passed 5 years ago at age 40. We are only 22 so we still have a couple of years before we are married, we have always been so excited to start our family because we want to be able to have those happy memories again. It is really sad thinking about all the things our parents missed, prom, hs graduation, about to be college graduation and eventually our wedding and their grandchildren. I haven’t had happy family memories since my mom died when I was 11 so I can not wait to give my child those things I never had! We still plan on waiting a few years after we get married to have kids though. 

Post # 9
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2014

This is exactly what happened to us! We were waiting to get married and have kids for no real reason, just because. We own a house, have some money saved, and have stable jobs. Then my Dad died unexpectedly last year at 46 and all the sudden I wanted kids as soon as it was feasible. The majority of the reason is like you said, wanting to live life to the fullest because you just never know what tomorrow brings.

Post # 11
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@MRS-K:  We are trying now. We aren’t doing a big wedding, and are still contemplating not having one at all. We bought a house last year and I’d much rather put the money into renovations! Since I’m still waiting for my cycle to come back after depo it’ll probably be a while anyway. We were going to wait because at first I was concerned about what people would think but we’ve gotten to point where we feel “ready” so I’ve stopped caring (mostly) and we’re going for it!  Good luck to you and your DH 🙂 

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