extension of the LDR :(
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anyone else making HIM wait?

posted 2 years ago in Waiting
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    1.
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    Newbee
    hipflower    April 8, 2012  

    Hi Bees! 

    Although I've been stalking WB forever, I finally took the plunge and registered :) I have known and lusted (haha) after bf for 3 years, but only been dating for 11 mos because I was previously in another relationship that took it's time to unravel. 

    He wants to be engaged/married like yesterday .... I know he has had the ring hidden away for months already and it's burning holes in his pockets. The only reason it hasn't happened is because I told him he wasn't allowed to ask me until we've been dating at least a year. (I'm thinking he will propose in August or September this year). I know he's the one, and we are essentially already "pseudo-planning" a wedding for late next year, but I just am a very cautious person and don't want to rush it :p 

    Please tell me I'm not the only one making HIM wait! Everyone seems to think I'm insane! 

     

     

     
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    Dancy905    February 5, 2010  

    Welcome to Wedding Bee! I've been engaged for over a year but I was in your position. FI was ready to get married before I was. I asked him to wait 2 years & we did. It didn't interfere with our relationship at all. I just wanted to make sure we'd be in a stable position where we could afford the wedding & home we wanted. I thought we would get engaged around last summer or Christmastime but it came in February!! Hah!

     
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    Buzzing bee
    veganglam    January 5, 2013   Philadelphia; Wedding in NYC

    Welcome to the bee and congrats on your impending engagement!

     I didn't exactly make him wait, but I DID propose. :) He didn't even know he was waiting, haha. 

     
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    Busy bee
    Carbon Girl    January 17, 2010   Vermont, planning from Gainesville, FL

    Major props to veganglam for proposing!  I wish I was that gutsy!

     
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    hipflower    April 8, 2012  

    Thanks for the welcome girls! I felt a little awkward posting on the waiting board when essentially, I'm the reason I'm waiting haha. 

     

    @Dancy - that's my worry, that because he wants me to be surprised now I'll be waiting forever! 

    And @ veganglam, if only I could be so bold! How did you do it?! I smell an interesting story ;)

     
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    mermaideve      

    veganglam: i am jealous. I want to be engaged. I want to propose! But I want him to get to be the one who pops the question. Sigh.

     
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    Bumble bee
    Neva    July 2010  

    I didn't make him wait, but he was definitely the one that started talking about it first.  He did propose a bit sooner that I'd have expected, but I was totally ready and said yes.

    I know we hear a lot about girls waiting..but I think there are a lot more guys out there who are ready to get engaged and married than we often realize.  Maybe I attract "different" guys, but it always seems to be the guy who is the one who pushes to make a relationship exclusive...or to marry.

     
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    Beekeeper
    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    Welcome! And you're totally not alone. Before he made me wait, I totally made him wait! Starting around the 1-1.5 year mark FI started making noises about marriage stuff and I think if I would have given him the go-ahead he would've done it right then! I always made it very clear I wasn't ready though. I really wanted to graduate, get a job, and live on my own a bit before I decided to get married. A bit after our 2 year anniversary I decided I was ready and (not so subtely) hinted as to that, and I'm pretty sure he started saving immediately! I then had to wait about 5 months for him to save the money and find the ring... but it all worked out in the end :)

     
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    Busy bee
    pendola      

    I made DH wait until I was out of school so we were engaged 3 years in when he was ready long before that, LOL. 

     
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    Buzzing bee
    caitlanc    September 12, 2009   Western Slope of Colorado

    I didn't make him wait but I almost did.  Even though I was bringing up wedding stuff more than he was (and had most of it planned out) it wasn't all that real to me.  I thought we had it vaguely set out that we would get engaged Fall of 2009 and marry in 2010.  I was definitely surprised when he proposed in January and we were married Fall of 2009!  I said yes right away but it took a little while for me to wrap my head around it and agree to do it that year and not push it back to 2010.  (And thank goodness for that!  I would have gone crazy if our engagement was any longer than it was!) 

     
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    Helper bee
    Nerdette       Toronto,ON

    I'm making my SO wait too! Ha! He wanted to propose at this past christmas, we'd have been dating for a year and maybe 3 months? I'm not that concerned about being engaged this second, I love him and know he's going to be my partner in life, but the larger issue is that his sister just got engaged and is planning her wedding for this coming July. I don't want to interfere with her day, especially if she is to become my sister!  I know it sounds crazy, but I just want to keep the peace!

     

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