Anyone else marrying an older man?

posted 3 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
4072 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Most of these posts are from people with maybe 10 year age gap at most. 31 is a whole lot more! So he’s in his 70s (I see your profile says you’re 43)?

With that much of an age gap, there are going to be comments and judgements no matter what. You can’t control what other people think. You just have to be happy and confident with yourselves.

Post # 5
Member
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Well he’ll be 35 and I’ll be 28 if that’s a big gap hehe.

Post # 6
Member
1175 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@KatMacErskine:  My fiance is 14 years older than me.  But he and I get along like we are of the same age.

Age is a number.  I don’t believe that love is only can happen within the confines of a number.  I do worry that I will lose mine long before I am ready to let go.  But on the other hand I will be happy with whatever time I get, because that time is OURS.  Other than that, our age difference doesn’t ever come up.

People will judge.  It doesn’t matter what you do.  I think that if you love each other, that is what matters.  And frankly, it isn’t anyone else’s business what your retlaionship status is, age, race, gender…..

If you and he are happy……I say good for you both!!

Post # 7
Member
332 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - Sea Ranch Lodge

Who cares what the age gap is? You love each other and want to commit to one another – that’s reason to celebrate!

My FI is only 7 years older, but even we get some questioning sometimes. If any of his friends’ wives comment… they are probably just jealous that you’re younger and hotter than they are 😉

Post # 8
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013 - Casa de España

@KatMacErskine:  @thumpurr:  My FI is 15 years older than me, but has been the most meaningful relationship I’ve ever had. He gets me like no one else, believe me, I’ve been with guys my age, they don’t get me. I guess it’s because I grew up with my dad, who is pretty old and I have a different mentality. But I gotta say that my FI is such a humble, good hearted, beautiful person, I just feel so lucky to have him in my life. Then again, we can’t focus on the time we will or not have because life can be pretty tricky in that department, and we’re young. He’s 43, I’m 28. 

BE HAPPY! Forget about people say. It’s better to have the chance of being in a meaningful relationship that fulfilles you with a man who loves you than dealing with all sorts of crap that can happen by following “standards” 

Post # 9
Member
1175 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@memo1012:  Oh believe me, I am very happy.  I would not trade him for the world.  He is so sweet and kind.  But we do look at things from a later in life perspective.  I’m 42, he is 56.  So we don’t have all the years left to do things like purchasing a home.  So our schedule is a little more rushed than what a younger couple has.  But we have the same goals, and we both work equallly hard to achieve them.  His biggest priority is to make sure I am “all set” if something should happen.  My priority is, to make him the happiest man on the planet.

I have dated guys my age, and I think that I have found that I need someone who is more sure footed, and experienced in matter of the heart.  We have been together now for almost 6 years, and have been friends for some years before that.

I don’t get too many comments on our age anymore.  In the beginning people were pretty critical.  But now I think they see that we are the perfect combination.

Take advantage of the time you have.  You are still young.  

But I agree.  BE HAPPY!!

Post # 10
Member
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

No doubt about it 31 years is a HUGE gap.

Personally, being over 50 and having seen a lot of life, I think the maximum that I would feel comfortable with would be under 15 years, maybe even under 12.  And that is because, at either end of the scale (younger or older) the gap is more apparent / harder.

Mr TTR is 10 years older than me… and pushing 70, while I am pushing 60.  I know that statistically he won’t be here much longer… and that makes me very sad.

So we have to make the best of the time we have together NOW

Sounds like you and Brian have been thru a lot… I am glad that you have found happiness together at last.  Young love is sweet, but Mature Love is a 100x sweeter, cause you are more knowledgeable about life and the world, and able to truly appreciate it !!

CONGRATULATIONS !!

Here’s wishing you both the best, and that you have many wonderful years together !!

 

Post # 11
Member
346 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Wow, that’s a big gap. But everyone knows, the older you get the less of a big deal it is. My FI is 7 years older than me, and I’m in my mid-twenties. Though, he still looks like he’s my age so we don’t get questioned much. In fact, I rarely think about the difference except for certain life stages. Then he points out that he’s ‘been through all that before.’

Post # 13
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

My FI is 7 years older then me so not such a big deal, my friends FI is 12 years older then her and my FI mums husband is 20 years older 🙂

Post # 14
Member
537 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

19 years between me and Mr. Hausfrau (I’m 30). We’ve been together for 5 years, and at the beginning, I thought more of the age difference than I do now. For me, the most important thing to remember is that none of us have the guarantees of time or health. Anyone, no matter how old or how long you’ve been together, could go at any time. Enjoy each and every day together regardless of any age gap- the loss of a partner will be horrendous no matter when it happens, whether you’ve been together for 20 years or 60 years. 

Post # 15
Member
92 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My husband is 12 yrs older than me and I never had any problem with that 🙂

Post # 16
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@memo1012:  I’m in the same boat! I’ve always felt like guys my age (I’m 26) never understood me, but my guy (he’s 40, will be 41 in October) does.

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