Anyone else not super excited about their wedding?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
625 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

@Lbward6:  I have only been engaged since Christmas and I’m already dreading it. We went to my parent’s house for my dad’s birthday on Saturday (at which time we’d been engaged for a whopping 3 days!) and my mom and sister are like SMOTHERING me with opinions, options, etc. They were HORRIFIED that we hadn’t set a date yet and started suggesting months/dates and when we did set our date–March 15, 2015–I get hit with it’s soooooo far away (really?! 14 months?!). It’s just overwhelming and making me not terribly excited about planning (my sister is my MOH). Like you, my parents want to pay for everything so I welcome their ideas and such but it’s like whoa, a week in and I already feel like I want to elope!! LOL

Post # 5
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

I am not a hostess, and it’s definitely showing in my attitude towards this wedding. Don’t get me wrong; I am THRILLED to be having a huge party, where people I love are coming from literally ALL over the globe to celebrate my commitment… I just am not big into planning events. 

So I’m keeping everything simple except the guest list. 😀

ceremony and reception at the same venue

simple venue with buffet, seat yourself, no decorations

no bridal party, hopefully no bachelorette, no drama

It would be more fun, I think, if I had people actively involved, but there just isn’t anyone to really do that with me, so I’m doing it myself and keeping it simple.

Post # 6
Member
2063 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

i am the type of girl that has dreamed about her wedding her whoooooooole life. the wedding i am having is not even close to the wedding i imagined. i am so pumped to marry my fiance but more and more i am wishing we had eloped to paris. we are having a destination wedding and i am not feeling even remotely skinny enough to be in a bathing suit in february… so i think that is weighing on me and really making me dread it.

Post # 8
Member
2063 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@Lbward6:  thank you but the holidays didn’t help, i have definitely gained a few back. getting back on the wagon tomorrow. nowhere near bikini ready!

 

Post # 9
Member
1287 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Lbward6:  You are NOT alone!!  I think media and the industry has led some brides astray in that this would be the most important thing/day of their life, and the best.  And so, we are expected to feel this instanteous and immediate bridal gene 🙂 While some have it, and I wish I did, others do not.  And although, yes, this will be a magical day for my FI and I, and I love him so so so so much…I find myself just ‘meh’ about the entire thing.  I am MORE excited about our marriage and our plans for a family, then I am about the planning/spending and executing of the biggest party we will ever throw!!  Sure, some would say, why do it?  We have invited that conversation a lot, but decided we wanted to share our vows with friends and family – and, a lot of those could not or would not travel!

I thought that when this time of my life came, I would be the gal whom enjoyed every moment of the process, whom would be jumping with glee at every turn, and well, here I am…just making quick decisions to ‘get one more thing off our list done!’  

Although I look forward to seeing my FI at the end of the aisle, it also gives me a bit of anxiety too,  because the ‘all eyes on me’ makes me nercvous.  It is quite comical at how different I feel, but the thought of marrying this man makes me smile from ear to ear!!

Post # 10
Member
48 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2014

you’re not alone at all. i can only plan in short bursts, anyhting more than an hour or two and i want to claw my eyeballs out.

trying to get everyones addresses, signing contracts, and just everything else wedding related in general just makes me want to scream.

 

both my fiance and i are super excited about getting married, its just the actual “getting there” is a lot more than we expected.

 

BUT we get to do a tasting in the middle of january and thats pretty exciting! haha

Post # 11
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Me 🙁 my wedding in three weeks. Not really looking foward to it for some reason 

Post # 12
Member
1888 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Me!  I just saw this post right after I posted asking the same thing.  It’s so nice to know that I’m not the only one.  

Post # 13
Member
631 posts
Busy bee

amandeebee:  if this is really how you feel then you need to call it off ASAP.  Hard to do but even harder to go through with living a life you clearly don’t want.  I called my first wedding off because it didn’t feel right and everyone was so supportive and said better you make sure now rather than later.

Post # 15
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I was always really into the whole wedding, the dress, the decorations, and mainly the big party with your loved ones celebrating something entirely awesome.

But the more I get into it, the more excited my friends and family are for me, the more chill I feel.  I definitely was the one who wanted the wedding more (FI woulda been happy with just running away to Vegas 😉 but he’s happy to help me with the planning etc and I have a super supportive MOH.

I chose & bought my gown last week, and my mom, who flew from the UK to help me choose (EEK! No pressure!) said “well done! you did a good job!” And I was like “wait, what, I just tried on white frilly dresses until I found one I liked (whichneedsalotofadjustmentshooboy), it wasn’t exactly difficult/hard work?”

Wedding industry is a little wacko, basically.  All the way through Fi and I have just been going “Yep. Looks good.  Cool.  Ace.  Done.” – no wrangling, no searching through a million venues.  We took the first venue we looked at, our friends are the officiant and dj, we’re bringing in our own liquor and I’m honestly spending more on an elaborate grooms gift than any of my actual wedding planning cause I love buying FI gifts. 

Don’t sweat it.  We can’t all be squealy and ecstatic over a single day (albeit an awesome and meaningful one) – it is definitely about the marriage, not the wedding. If it makes you feel better, I’m always telling people “It isn’t a magical day of wonder (for me).  It’s the day i stand up in front of my loved ones and say “THIS ONE! I CHOOSE THIS WEIRDO!”  and point at FI.  And then we have a party.”

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