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Did you see Miss Powder Puff's post about Miss Manners?
From Miss Manners' book as quoted by Miss Powder Puff, "Who told you that you had to give out wedding favors? Etiquette has never thought of weddings as comparable to children’s birthday parties, where the guests might need consolation for not being the center of attention. You owe them only the hospitality of the occasion"
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I also think that favors are a waste. My mom offered to make chocolates though, so that's what we're having - most people like chocolate, and the out of town guests can eat them instead of leaving them behind. Plus, making them is cheaper and adds a personal touch. I think if my mom hadn't volunteered, we wouldn't have favors.
Some favors are DEFINETLY a waste, but not having them at all is more tacky that the stupid candy box I got at the last wedding I was at. You and your FH should definetly do something to say thank you to your guests that traveled to, sat for, and celebrated your big day. I just read in in style weddings that favors should alwasy be edible. Think tuxedo strawberries of candied apples -- anything for the guests to munch on, enjoy and feel appreciated.
If the favors are something meaningful to you, I think guests would appreciate it. For our favors, we're donating flip flops to an organization that I have served with for the past 4 years and focuses on ministering to Romanian orphans. We'll also be having a photo booth so guests can take something tangible home with them.
I agree they can be a waste. I have a pile of letter openers and other things I don't use that often, though I always did appreciate the candy gifts when I got them. :)
In the end, this is YOUR wedding so I think you get to decide. If you have something better to spend the money on that your guests will love, then go for it. If you think it's going to cause drama to not have favors, maybe a small food gift can help smooth that over. Think about what your guests will appreciate more and go for it!
I was surprised to read that several other posters' parents or older relatives were scandalized by the thought of not having favors. I had to explain to my parents and grandmother what wedding favors are, so this truly must be regional. That said, I like the idea of having favors, if we can think of something that's meaningful to us. We both LOVE coffee, so I'm thinking of doing mini bags of coffee with personalized labels. It's edible, and it won't melt -- very important for our July wedding!
Yuppers! Def a waste IMHO. Thats why we are donating to the animal shelter where we got our dog from - shes an important part of our lives, shell be there for our day; its our way of saying we wish we could help others more.
Favours have become tradition - and it's often an unfortunate one. Dependig on the favour they can definitely go to waste, which is why we're using our late-night snack candy bar as our favours... we'll do up pretty little boxes or sachets for guests to scoop candy into - to eat then and there or take with them and enjoy later.
Favors = Waste!
Food = Good!
Good food favors = 
(Candy bars, truffles, yummy cookies, just about anything chocolate)
Bad food favors = 
(I swear I once got a cookie favor that could have chipped concrete then once I got a bag of those almond things -btw why won't those nasty things just go away)
But in all honesty favors are a waste of precious resources (time and money) and are great to continue a theme but soooooo not needed. If you do give one, give something people can eat.
I was excited about doing favors as a tie-in to our theme. But the favors were one of the the most time-intensive DIY projects on my plate, and I made an executive decision to cut them this weekend. We have a photo booth, so that's kind of a favor in and of itself (or so I hope!)
I am, however, doing welcome bags for our out-of-towners. Our wedding is a destination wedding for the majority of our guests (almost 90%), and who doesn't like a bottle of water and some snacks in their hotel room? Besides which, it's my way of playing hostess, so it brings me joy to do it. :)
I'm all about useful favors (charity donations, edibles, etc.), but I agree with other commentors that they are certainly not required and that the money can definitely be spent elsewhere to greater effect.
I have never once seen a favor at a Jewish wedding in the NE. I dont know why, but its just not a traditional thing for us. The best I have ever received was a nice CD of the couples wedding music. Other than that, the candles, candy, and other assorted stuff has been a waste. Our money will go to the wedding food after which none of our guests will be able to fit a morsel of candy in! Also, we will have OOT bags for hotel guests.
I am indifferent to favors. In addition to our cake we are having an Italian cookie cake, beside which I will leave boxes for guests to take a few home wiht them. We are also debating the issue of having a late night snack.
Other than that I like the idea of giving money to charity.
Someone gave me a mini-frame once that doubled as our place card. No idea where that frame ended up!
IMO wedding favors are unneccary if there's not something speical you want to share with your guests. We're giving a small sampling of our favorite chocolate, scharffen berger, as gifts, but, I have to give it to my future-grandpa-in-law when he said,
"Weddings are not children's birthday parties. Guests do not need to be soothed because the day is not about them."
I'll go ahead and throw in (as many others have) that there's no etiquette stating you need favors. Personally I like getting the candies (because they're good for a snack in an emergency!), but I don't exactly notice when they're absent either.
I'm skipping a traditional favor. But I intend to do some sort of dessert table with appropriately sized bags-- if someone wants to take loot home, so be it :)
You don't "owe" guests anything. These are supposed to be our close friends and relatives who we don't have to bribe. You show them a good night at the reception with upgraded food/entertainment and they'll be more than happy.
As a very close friend of the couple, I always do like a small momento of the occasion. (Though usually this falls undera wedding party gift.)
As a guest, small, yummy munchies are always appreciated. However, I think time, money, and effort would be better placed in mailing out thoughtful thank you notes.
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I'm anti-favor.
Most of my guests are traveling for my wedding, so i don't think anyone really wants to find the space in their luggage for favors. Candy\Chocolate is cute, but who really eats it before it turns to smoosh in your car?
I've gone back and forth on this over and over-finally decided to do a sort of a modified favor. I looked at all of the neat fall favors-copper colored leaf cookie cutters, soap leaves, candles, etc. I then thought about the CD that we are making for the rehearsal dinner bc I know that is ONE of the ONLY favors from previous weddings that I kept and still listen to. I love the idea of the Yankee Candle votives, especially in their gorgeous fall scents, but they are expensive to do many of. Since we are on a major budget (under $5K for everything except my ering) we decided to do the wedding buttermints on the way out the door-bubbles on the other side. We are having brunch and people will be drinking coffee-we thought that was sufficient. I should also note that due to the large number of children, we are getting the wedding coloring books for kids and putting those in baskets for the reception.
I think favors are a nice way to say thank you to all the guests who dressed up and come to the wedding... and gave a gift. I'm not a HUGE fan of favors - but that depends on what you mean by favors? Cheesy wedding-themed favors that you find in all of the wedding stores are montly--IMO--tacky.
I'm a huge fan of food,though! My cousin makes the best chocolate truffles, so I've hired her to do those. Plus we're doing a candy buffet. Two ways of saying thanks!
I honestly cannot stand them. But I do love a good macaron! maybe we'll do that giving away a few in a box for each guest. Or a candy buffet.
But I cannot stand the plastic swan stuff with the almond candy (jordan almonds?). I have gotten about 100 of them since college.
First of all, nobody wants another candle, sugar lolipop that cuts your mouth, key chain, shot glass...most of the time I am not the least interested in favors. The tradition here in Spain is for the bride to give a pin to all the women and the groom to give a good Cuban cigar to all the men. I went to one wedding where the bridge gave a rose to each woman. That was nice, but still if you are travelling it'll die before you get home.
As far as my wedding goes, I was trying to think of what I'd like to receive. I loved these envelopes that I saw that have seeds in them and you plant them and then a flower grows. I also love scratch offs and thought, hey I can give each person a $1 scratch off. That's fun and something that anyone would want, and hey perhaps someone will win!!!! Finally, I like bamboo too, so I am going to give a stalk of lucky bamboo with a scratch off tied to it to each guest. That's cheap and actually something I'd want!
Most people don't realize how many favors (even the "good" edible kind) are left on the tables after the event. Some people just don't want them.
I have never had an event that didn't have a favor and a guest said, "Hey! Where is the favor?"
Trust me, they'll never miss them and you'll save $300 or more!
Depends on what the favor is, if its a waste. Make is something useful and its a great favor.
A cute little nick-nack to sit our your shelf - useless.
A baby tree that each guest can plant that will grow along with your marriage - awesome!
A donation to a charity in your guests names even if its a small amount or a single donation for all guests - awesome!
We are having a destination wedding in December and are giving our guest clear fillable christmas ornaments with our names and dates on the side along with instruction for them to fill the ornament with anything they like that reminds them of the Riviera Maya. We are hoping that people will hang them on thier Christmas trees each and think of the wedding and an amazing trip.
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i also like the idea of an edible or useful favor. some useful favors that i have gotten from weddings: heart cookie cutters with a quote about love, mini frame and then the bride/groom sent a thank you card with their photo to put in it, chopsticks, another couple had a spring wedding so they gave us flower seeds to plant, and personalized playing cards.
and of course anything glassware works too! if you're looking for cheap custom glassware http://www.customglassware.com printed pint glasses, custom flutes, shot glasses, etc. oh and if you want edible products like personalized chocolate http://www.wedding-supplies.com custom fortune cookies, wine bottles, etc.
since i love to cook i'm leaning towards baking something. i was thinking of baking cookies or biscotti then finding a cute lil box for wedding favors on www.wedding-supplies.com and tying it with a bow and recipe attached. i think i can start baking those months in advance and then just freeze them til closer to the wedding. billy joel's wife, katie, did that for their wedding and i thought it was a cute idea.
Yes! They are a waste! Most peoples can be found in good will stores across the country. Donations are nice and the tree idea is great!!!
I'm doing a different spin on my wedding favors. Rather than writing a thank you to all our guests in the program like many do, we're giving a personalized post card from Chicago to all of our guests. Since my fiance and I are both living in Chicago, but having the wedding 800 miles away, we thought it would be nice to bring a little bit of our home to our guests! These cost no more than $0.40 each and is, in my opinion, non-traditional and a little more personal.
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No, I don't think they're "sort of" a waste, I think they're a TOTAL waste of money. 
@limbobride - i was literally about to post the exact same thing!
I definitely do agree that they can be a waste, but I was at a wedding for my fiance's family where they had a cross word puzzle about the bride and groom. The down words were answers to questions about the groom and the across words were answers to questions about the bride. I thought it was a good way to get to know the bride and groom. My fiance has a large family so it was nice to get to know more about 1 of his 85 cousins.
I decided I wanted to do something along those lines and found Cootie Catchers on etsy.com. If you don't know what they are here is a picture.
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While I've always appreciated a good chocolate sucker or box o' truffles I find favors a silly waste of money. Half the time I think they're just there to add pizzzazz to the table. FI and I are making donations to 3 organizations: one from each of us (I'm doing a cancer research charity - not sure he's made up his mind yet) and one from us both to an animal charity in our dogs' names since they're both rescues.
IMO i do not think anyone will be dissapointed!! Especially if they are having a great time.
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