Anyone elses DH not like to DTD on demand?

posted 3 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

We’re not TTC and he is often like this.  He tells me to initiate more often but when I do he’s too tired or not in the mood.  Then he wonders why I don’t initiate as often as he would like.  

Post # 4
Member
2047 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’ll find out soon enough… I’m on CD9 after my first AF after BC so I have NO idea when I will O… so I told DH we’re “starting baby BD tonight” lol. We both work looooooong days so I think I might try to implement every day on weekends and every other day on weekdays until I get a temp shift.

I had a super long first cycle after BC and Im pretty sure it wont be the same from here on out so gotta just keep at it…. my DH is close with his boss and he knows we’re TTC and I guess they were talking about something and DH said he was afraid he would be too tired all the time and his boss was like “NO you have a job to do.. just get it in there, doesnt have to be fancy” …..lmao!!

Post # 5
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

 

beachbride1216:  MRS-K:  So true about men saying they want us to initiate but then responding more when we are a bit “harder to get”. Not currently TTC but we are kind of NTNP and I am vaguely aware of when im most likely fertile and as biology intended I am more in the mood at that time. And dh just never responds like I’d like him too :-/

But I have a secret trick…shhhh: While we are watching tv, I lie on our couch in a certain position while he is sitting on the loveseat behind me and i just start thinking SEX. It must come off in my body language or pheremones, because it almost never fails. And he has no idea he’s just been seduced! Our DD was conceived on that couch 🙂 I think they secretly like us to be coy. Must be that “me man, you woman” biological throwback to caveman days.

Good luck TTCing MRSK!

Post # 7
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

 

MRS-K:  Mine. I try and do the 3 day right before I expect O and I usually end up with every other day. He gets tired and sore and needs the break in between. He also doesn’t care for the added pressure it puts on. Last month I told myself I wouldn’t be so demanding (just go with the flow) but that week came around and I couldn’t help it. I wasn’t as bad about it, but I still kept asking for it daily. Now I’m planning next month not to ask and just aim for every other day, but it’s actually difficult to not think about it/verbalize it.

Post # 8
Member
219 posts
Helper bee

I know that towards the end of our TTC’ing it became way too much like work.  I remember getting upset each time aunt flo came around not only because I wasn’t pregnant, but because I would have to try to get DH to “perform on command” again. 

But I did receive some wonderful advice while TTC, that I would love to pass along.  CHANGE THINGS UP 🙂  Tell him that the night is all about HIM.  Give him a handjob with some sperm-friendly lube (Preseed) and have him ejaculate into a Softcup.  Put the softcup in and wear it just like you normally would.  This way you ended up having a great sexy time pleasing your hubby without actually having intercourse, but you still got the sperm donation 😉

Post # 10
Member
3195 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

MRS-K:  

Happy to hear that your husband made you feel better. 

I am childfree. However, I thought it might be useful to mention the perspective of a close friend who wants to have a child.

She and her husband used an ovulation predictor for about two months. That experience was stressful and my friend feels that making a baby should be fun. So she is no longer actively trying and is just going with the flow. 

Post # 13
Member
3195 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

MRS-K:  

It could be worth a shot. Remember that our parents and grandparents did not use OPKs and they still reproduced. My parents have four children that they never actively tried for. 

I’m not saying that it is wrong to use OPKs; they can be helpful. I’m just passing along info about what worked for others. 

Post # 15
Member
3195 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

MRS-K:  

I hope that you conceive soon. Keep us posted my friend. 

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