(Closed) Anyone feel guilty about their ring?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
914 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I wish I had found the bee before FI bought my ring. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my ring. But I wish we had known about Moissanite and other alternatives. We could have saved a lot of money. 

But I will not be giving my ring back cause I love it so much!

Post # 4
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yeah, I felt a little guilty after he ordered my ring. However, he was able to pay for it out right, and he wasn’t hurting for money afterward, so my guilt eased soon. I am glad, however, I found a (reletively) inexpensive ring that I loved.

Post # 5
Member
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I have to agree! I went with a lower quality to save money, but it was still more than I wish he would have spent! I wish I had known more about Moissy beforehand, but like PP’s I still love my ring and wouldn’t trade it.

Post # 6
Member
1595 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

nope, we bought pre-owned and saved a ton of money…if we were in a tight financial situation we could always sell the ring and actually profit from it.

Post # 7
Member
9956 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Funny, how so many women feel guilty when their BF buys them the most important purchase of their lifetime… and for many of us something we’ve been wishin & hopin for for eons.

I LOVE my E-Ring, but ya I feel a bit guilty too (know it cost Mr TTR a good wad of cash)

Same thing happened 30+ Years ago when my First Husband bought my E-Ring…

The two rings are immensely different, both in look and cost (we were broke Students the first time round)

A lifetime of experience (and this post) has told me that maybe as gals, we need to just suck it up, and think more positively of ourselves… our guys think we are amazing and valuable… and worth every penny they spend on the E-Rings…

So why can’t we see how GREAT we are too ??

 

Post # 8
Member
4328 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

I did too, and still do. My family guilts me for it all the time, since they say I “married up” and am a “snob.” They’ve always thought I was a snob long before I met DH, and it’s hurtful. 

Post # 9
Member
1692 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@This Time Round:  agreed!  We also wear it for our entire lives if all goes well!  I haven’t ever felt guilty, because I know he picked the setting and diamond with great care and attention and got me what he wanted to get.  I would have said yes to a ring pop, but he wanted what he wanted (and knew I would love) and I think I’m worth it!

Post # 10
Member
13894 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

sometimes, but the feeling passes pretty quickly.

Post # 11
Member
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

A big screen tv or a new laptop would be junk in a few years, a diamond (or whatever you choose) really IS forever. To be totally honest, a wedding is a huge,  extravagant, waste of money. One day and gone, tons of money on food and booze for people you probably rarely see, save for a few, it goes by in a flash and trust me you will not remember most of it in 20 years….been there, done that.

No, I dont feel guilty about a nice ring. Saved a few thousand for what? A disposable piece of eletronic equipment? A car that will be junk in 10 years? So 3rd cousin Elmo can get drunk on my dime? I’ll take the ring, thanks.

Post # 12
Member
933 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Hm, it didn’t even occur to me to feel guilty! It’s not really comparable to an entertainment product. Think about how long it will last compared to a TV (5-10 years?) or a laptop (4 years?). Maybe it’s just me, since I also don’t feel guilty spending on my morning coffee, buying lunch at work, my gym membership, etc. Actually I just realized I don’t really have guilt associated with just spending money.  But I have horrible guilt about not getting a good value on things. Like if I forgot to bring a coupon with me to the store and I still buy something there… that does make me feel upset.

As long as it’s not taking away from essentials like housing, food, transportation, rainy day & retirement savings, spend away!

Post # 13
Member
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I don’t know that I feel guilty. But I definitely do feel bad that we get a great shiny ring and they traditionally don’t get anything. I know I know….they get to know they are spending the rest of their lives with us, but I feel as though they deserve something awesome too.

Post # 14
Member
9826 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

No way, it’s a fabulous representation of all the years we’ve been together.

 

Post # 15
Member
1240 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I do feel guilty sometimes but I am also proud of it. I felt guilty when I realised that for the same money I could pay for my sponsorchild in Africa for 13 years.  But I do love my ring.

Post # 16
Member
9956 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Funny that we are comparing the cost of our rings to stuff…

Agree tho with @Rrabbetsgirl: and @LucyLaLa:  it does put its longterm value into a much better context.

I remember when Mr TTR and I first started talking rings (and home renos) I said that my ring had to cost more than a fridge (what we were looking at buying at the time)

Lol, and in the end YES it does !!

 

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