Weddingbee boards

Went home alone to visit my parents. They said, "Why don't you come visit more with Mr. LuLu?"

For almost a year of marriage, they still have required that he sleep in the family room on a couch alone infested with cat hair (he's allergic) while I sleep in my twin bed that I've had since I was four. My room is a shrine to my girlhood with porceline dolls and ballerina pictures.

My husband is 40. I am 30. We thought it was funny when we were dating that the visits home to the Catholic parents required he be locked out on the couch. But it's a little old right now.

It had never occured to them that as a married couple we might want to stay in the same room. They have a four bedroom home and would not convert a room to a comfortable guest room for us.

Until now...we really didn't come visit. It just wasn't comfortable.

So a trip to living spaces later with a queen bed means my mother is going to put the hard sell on having us visit together.

Anyone else experience that?

Nope, but that is wild! Do you tell your parents you'd prefer to sleep together? I can't believe it makes them uncomfortable even after you are married! I can definitely see why you don't want to visit more often!

Then my mom says she wants grandkids. So weird. Does the stork bring them?

Thanks Marzipan. I feel validated. Sometimes I can't tell what's normal.

LOL - the stork :) 

We aren't married (yet!) but we do have to sleep in seperate bedrooms when we visit my aunts/grandparents, even though we live together. I just do it out of respect at this point. My parents live nearby, so we've never had a need to stay at their house. But when we're married, it'll be one bedroom!

His parents always put us in the same room, even when we'd only been dating a few months. We were in our mid-20s by then, so they knew the score.

The first time we visited my family we stayed in a hotel because I was really just there for my 10-year reunion. The next time, he slept on the sofa bed in the basement. But after that we were always together in my old room, which has become the guest room/library. Considering I was born out of wedlock and my stepfather moved in a year before they got married, she was actually pretty prudish about the whole thing. But his evangelical Christian parents were way cool.

Oh I just love the bees. Thanks for all of the support. I will stand up to them or get a hotel. What we were doing was just not stayin overnight and then driving up the coast to stay at a hotel.

People are funny. ;)

Veganglam, it's my parents actually. They're funny.

Thanks for laughing about everything with me bees. Humor softens it all.

I'm curious, did you parents explain or give a reason why you should sleep seperately post-wedding? How did it come about in the first place?

Good luck talking to them. :)

I spoke to the parents. They have agreed to change the house a bit and make a dedicated guest bedroom with a queen bed. Thanks Bees! In fact, my mom put my girlhood bedset out on the street with a free sign and a nice lady came by and picked up the entire set for her two year old grandchildren! Yay!

My grandmother passed recently so they put some of her furniture in my old room after my pleading and insistence.

I think my parent's realized that we won't visit if they didn't finally make a change. We've been married for almost a year and we've been home three times without them making a change and Mr. LuLu on the couch. (Mr. LuLu is cheap and won't pay for a hotel or will make money an excuse not to come)

But really-I'm the youngest. They still see me as a little girl. My room has ballerinas on the wall and had not changed since girlhood. Mr. LuLu has slept on my family's couch for YEARS.

Change is hard. Maybe my growing up makes them feel old. It wasn't even a prudish sex thing totally. Yes, it grosses them out if we have sex in their house (me too actually). But that's not why we would want to stay in the same room.

They still see me as their baby. Oh well.

Haha.....wow :-P. When we first got married, it felt a little weird for us to sleep together at someone elses house, especially at my parents, but it would have been weirder not to. We always sleep on the pull-out couch in the living room