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i have been sick for 2 days, this is not fun!!

Anyone not drink? Ever awkward ? (NWR)

posted 2 years ago in The Lounge
  • 2 Members Subscribed To Topic
  • poll: Are you and SO drinkers?
    Yep! Both of us are. : (62 votes)
    60 %
    I am, but he is not. : (8 votes)
    8 %
    I'm not, but he is. : (7 votes)
    7 %
    Neither of us are! : (19 votes)
    18 %
    Other, I'll explain below. : (8 votes)
    8 %
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    1.
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    So this is not really wedding related... but I was just curious how many non-drinkers are out there. I do drink, but not much. I'm more of a wine with dinner, margarita with the girls... but almost never drunk kind of girl. I just don't like the feeling of being drunk and I always feel crappy the day after. 

    FI doesn't drink at all though, not a drop. It isn't for any super concrete reason... he used to drink but wasn't an alcoholic or anything. He just felt that he had an addictive personality and that it might be a problem in the future, so he decided he didn't need it to be a part of his life. Luckily he doesn't really mind being around it (other than being bored if people are doing nOTHING but drinking)... it isn't like he wants to drink or is tempted or anything. 

    This has created a few awkward situations though because people never understand that he doesn't drink. He is constantly getting weird looks or lots of questions like... even champagne? Even just a glass? Are you an alcoholic? Ugh. It is super annoying. I was just curious if anyone else out there ever deals with this? 

     

    BTW for purposes of the pole... if you ever drink... you are a "drinker" :)

     
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    eloping    May 23, 2010  

    neither of us drink...hubby may have a rare drink but im talking once every couple of years and usually at a party so its a shot of something and then thats it

    my parents were both alcoholic so i have no taste for it but generally our livestyle is so busy (we wake up at 5.20am 7 days per week and scuba dive 3+ times per week) so we have little time to indulge even if we wanted to

     

     
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    lolabear       Denver

    I just wanted to say how great I think it is that your FI recognizes he has an addictive personality and decided not to drink before it even became a problem!  I just find that amazing, I don't think I have ever even heard something like that before.  My Fi and I both drink, (not heavily, but like you, margs with the girls and champagne for celebrations etc.) but a lot of his friends are heavy drinkers and it has really negatively affected their lives.  I just wonder how different the world would be if everyone could be as mature and realistic as your man!  

     
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    pren79    10/17/09   SF Bay Area

    I'm Catholic. How can I not drink? My SO is not Catholic but loves at least a beer almost every day. If I were your FI, I would just say, it's a personal choice to abstain. I know a couple of people who abstain not because they were alcoholics and not because of religious reasons but just 'cuz.

     
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    catlady    June 26, 2010   Toronto

    Yep, FI and I are both drinkers.  We aren't the type who'll have alcohol during meals but we certainly welcome outings with friends...which usually includes alcohol.  I don't think I look at non drinkers any different than drinkers; I totally get it's not for everyone and I can respect that.  Heck, more power to you for not drinking!

    Oh and neither of us have ever drank for the sole purpose of getting drunk.  I know people who are like that and it's not pretty at all.

     
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    @lolabear- i know! the decision was made before i ever came into the picture but i thought it was cool too. I think of all of the families that are hurt by an alcoholic family member and I'm just so thankful that he never let it become a problem for him. He's a good guy :) 

     
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    krissycake    November 21, 2009   orlando,fl

    I picked other...it's probably a once a month thing for me, FI will have a beer a few times a week.

     
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    jduck84    August 2010   Minneapolis, MN

    Nope, neither of us do. I get an upset stomach with 1 drink, and usually feel nauseated after 2, and nothing stays down after 3 (I learned this in college. Over and over.)

    It used to be annoying because I'd have friends who would say, just one drink! just one glass of wine! I HATED it. Not only does it make me sick, but I don't enjoy the taste of beer, hard liquor, or wine. Now, though, we don't really hang out in settings with people like that, so it's not a problem.

    Fiance doesn't drink because he doesn't enjoy the taste either, and says he just doesn't see the need for it. We figure we save a lot of money this way. Meaning, we spend it on other things. :)

     
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    Mrs. Spring    May 10, 2009   California

    We don't drink much.  Maybe we'll have a beer once a month, but that's about it.  I feel like with personal questions where people might be a little judgey, it's kinda best to shut them down early.  :)  If people we don't know ask us why we're not having alcohol, we usually just say that we don't feel like it.  If they get pushy and want to know specifics or keep pushing us to drink when we don't want to, we just tell them that it's our personal decision not to drink right now.  Period.  I don't like trying to explain myself to someone if I feel like they're being judgemental. 

     
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    tbk041710    04-17-10   Augusta, GA

    Well, my FI works for the number one beer company in the U.S. and he gets two free cases of beer a month, so yes we drink but not heavily. Beer is the one thing always in our fridge because we get it for free lol I think we probably drink about one beer a week.  I like to tell people I see drinking his product, "Thanks for paying me bills, lol" I prefer margarita's though.

    Like lolabear, we know a lot of heavy drinkers, and it makes for very uncomfortable situations.  It really is a problem when someone can never remember what they did on the weekends...

     
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    @jduck- good point about the money too :) the only alcohol i ever buy is wine... but that is generally just when i am having people over for dinner. I do enjoy the taste of wine and mixed drinks.... but once again I can have one maybe two then I'm done. I am hoping that as we get older our friends will move a bit away from their drinking tendencies. Right now, the majority of our friends STILL think its fun to get trashed on beer pong every thurs, fri, and sat night. I'm so over it. :/

     
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    Arineya      

    I don't drink, and FI will have a drink on a social occasion where other's are drinking. There is alcoholism on my Mum's side, so I have zero taste for it. A lot of our closest friends drink while we're out, they don't get drunk or anything, but they do drink and might get tipsy- it can be awkward at times because we don't join in. I actually think we're fine with it but it makes them awkward hah

     
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    roxymarie      

    Neither of us drink. We never have and we don't really plan to. We're still underage for a few months anyway so we don't get bothered about it yet. Alcoholism actually runs on both my parents sides so I don't even want to chance it. Plus I'm also aware that I have an addictive personality so I know it wouldn't go well.  Luckily none of our friends really drink so we won't have to worry about that, if anything it'll just be my guys cousins bugging him about not drinking.

     
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    bluespurrs    August 7, 2009   South-central PA, USA, Earth

    I have nothing against alcohol; I simply can not drink it! I lack alcohol dehydrogenase which means I can not detoxify it. One drink and I am instantly sick. Love to cook with it tho. Hubby used to be a lush, but quit and hasn't consumed alcohol in 15 years.

     
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    MissHelen    November 20, 2010   California

    FI also doesn't drink. We met at a party, and he was holding a coke. He doesn't because he also has an addictive personality and recognizes that, and he's on medication that makes it a huge no-no. I just don't like it, and if anyone asks me why I don't drink, that's what I tell them.

     
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    tessabella76    September 12, 2009   Ohio

    We both drink. I hardly drink at all. I've never been a big drinker and the one and only time I had a hangover-it was the most awful thing I've ever felt! My husband used to drink a lot more than he does now. Since meeting me, he's cut way back. He used to go the the bar every weekend and sometimes through the week. Now we maybe go once a month. And this past Saturday (Halloween) was the first time we've been to the bar since we've been married (and I didn't even drink). For him, it was the social aspect of it. He hadn't had a girlfriend for a long time and most of his friends live out of the area so he'd go to the bar to hang out. Now he'd rather hang out wit me! :)

     
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    RecessionistaBride    January 28, 2012  

    We drink socially... but not a lot. Occasionally we will crack open a bottle of vino... but it's not a regular thing. :)

     
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    moonbeam      

    He drinks occasionally, but I drink about half a drink every few months.  While I was training for my first marathon, I had a couple of drinks the night before my first 10 mile run.  I finished up my drinks at about 11 pm and didn't run until the next afternoon, but it was horrible.  Any drink I have just physically affects me so much.  I get weird comments and stuff, because even though Californians are 'healthy' they drink like fiends.  I just say it ruins my runs and they sort of back off after that.

     
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    pansyshell    October 8, 2010   Central Pa, Wedding in Outer Banks, NC

    FH and I don't drink really. We have in the past but it's just one of those things we are not a fan of at all and probablly only drank once since we've been together. 

    It makes me so sick...like a couple sips and I'm in the bathroom face down in the bowl and I hate the way it makes me feel. I struggled with the awkwardness of being at a party and not drinking in college and even now when people find out I was in a sorority they assume I drink/drank and did so A LOT. Really only once a week at the most during only my junior/senior years (never before 21). 

    FH lacks the enzyme to break down the alcohol, so does his mom. It runs in the Japanese culture and was passed onto him. He gets bright red, starts sweating like crazy and sometimes struggles to breath all from just a few sips. He also hates the way it makes him feel and gets the spins (which he'll get in no time). The first time he drank in front of my family, my dad became concerned after only 1 drink because my family didn't completely believe how fast he gets red/can't drink (my brothers drink beer like it's H2O and their only comment to FH was "that sucks man"). His dad is an alcoholic so that is another reason he doesn't want to drink...just like your man Corgi.

     
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    luli29    October 9, 2010   Massachusetts

    we both drink...although he like his beers and I only drink rarely. I don't think I've ever gotten drunk, and have certainly never puked or gotten a hangover. I'm a lightweight!

     
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    JoesWifey    May 24, 2009   NYC/Wedding in Indiana

    heh, as I was reading the post I had just poured myself a glass of limeade with a bit of rum mixed in :p Hubby drinks much more often than I. I really just dont like beer and wine and most alcohol. I like the Mikes stuff and such, daiquiris, and apparently rum lol I rarely ever finish even one bottle of Mike's though. I just don't drink much. I hate how it makes me feel like I have to pee even though I really don't have to... lol I've never been drunk, or close to it, and I dont think I've ever even been buzzed. It's just not something I want to experience!

     
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    artbee    February 28, 2010  

    we don't drink. i get migraines, he has stomache issues. he used to drink, but got smart and realized for health reasons he shouldn't, and by the time he met me he was done with all that, which is good because i was never a drinker and having a hard time finding someone i could relate to with that. everyone wants to meet for drinks on the first date, and people thought i was weird when i said no to that.

     
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    JoesWifey    May 24, 2009   NYC/Wedding in Indiana

    Oh, hubby is chinese and he turns bright red after drinking too lol It doesn't make him sick though mostly. He's been drunk once or twice though and threw up once (I wasn't around), but he doesn't seem to mind so much lol

     

    @Corgi, you should have your guy tell people he's pregnant so he can't drink and see what they say lol

     
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    daydreamwanderer       DC

    I'm a lush, hahaha... seriously though, I have a problem.

    J on the other hand can have about half a beer before he's drunk, handsy and will have a hangover in the morning. He really lives up to the Asian stereotype.

    He likes to drink, but he mostly regrets it. I on the other hand drink like a fish. ;)

     

    (okay, I'm not actually a lush, I just really love wine. and dark beer. and cocktails. and shots. and more wine.)

     
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    bamm    June 5th 2010/August 15th 2010   Seoul

    I like alcohol, but I don't tend to drink a lot.  FI on the other hand....in many Korean companies you MUST go out and drink with your boss.  It's absolutely mandatory.  Even people who don't drink for religious reasons or have alcoholics in their family have to drink. If FI didn't go out, or refused to drink, he would probably have problems getting a promotion or even staying with his company.  I've even been to work functions where there were people with liver problems or preganant.  They aren't forced to drink, but everyone talks about them and they have to 'pretend' to drink by pouring water into their glasses (and you can't even 'fake' a disease because companies pay for health checks and then you have to submit them to your company).  It makes me so mad.  FI's old boss was an absolute alcoholic and forced them to go out 3 or 4 times a week (and then forced other teams to make up the 1 or 2 days he wasn't drinking with his own team).  Thankfully his current team is a bit different, so he has to go out weekly, but his boss doesn't force tooo much on him.  I work in a department with a lot of foreigners, and I'm a woman, so luckily I don't have to drink with my male bosses.  But I had a male friend who used to teach in the business program at my university, and he had to go drinking regularly in order to keep in his manager's good books :(

     
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    littlemissmoo    July 18, 2010   London, UK

    I selected before I read. What I should have selected was "neither, will explain below" but actually I went with "I do but he doesn't". He has a celebratory glass of champagne and OJ at new years and Valentine's Day, etc etc. He'll have a glass of champagne at the wedding but whenever we go out I'll drink and he won't. It's just a personal choice on his part. He thought he had too many vices and he never got into wanting to go out to get drunk when he "became legal" so he never did and therefore never developed a taste for beer or wine. 

    That being said since we've been together I've certainly drunk less. Again, it's just a personal choice. We also don't tend to frequent pubs together a lot and we're definitely not clubbers. Any friends of ours know about him not drinking so it's never been a problem or caused any awkward situations.

     
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    LeahNHeath    July 17, 2010   Tulsa, OK

    My FI drinks a lot more than me. I think mainly because I'm picky. I usually only drink beer and wine. Mixed drinks are a bad thing for me because I tend to not notice how many I'm drinking because they taste so good. I can usually keep track when I'm drinking beer.

     
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    SoonToBeMrs.Kiss    June 11, 2011   Central Pennsylvania

    my FI drinks ocasionally, if we are out a dinner, or at a party he is known to have a few beers, and on rare ocassion has even gotten drunk. I don't like to drink, not one bit. I have tried, and have gotten drunk before, and hated how it made me feel, and I also grew up around my dad who was known to get drunk, and he got mean when he was drunk. He never hit anyone, but I never put it passed him. So growing up around it and seeing how it made my dad react also kinda pushed the appeal of drinking away from me. But you know when I turnd 21 I had to try it, and well I haven't had anything since that day. It just does not appeal to me. I'm not an alcoholic by any means, I never gave myself a chance to become one, and honestly I don't think I would be if I did drink, it just isn't for me. People should respect that, and understand that some people just don't like it, not even a glass.

     
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    I"m surprised by how many people here don't drink! I think that FI and I need to make some new friends haha. Every one of both of our friends are BIG drinkers.... as in they feel the need to drink excessively all. the. time. We really can't go out on a saturday night with friends without someone getting drunk. blech.

     
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    daydreamwanderer       DC

    Corgi, do you ever make snarky replies to why he doesn't drink? like the suggested "he's pregnant" or anything else?

     
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    Appleblossom    April 24, 2010  

    We both drink, but not a lot. FI probably has a beer a few times a week, and me maybe once a week.

    Sometimes I get sick of hearing people ask if I want another one when I don't (If I want one I'll get it, leave me alone!). So I fake it with half empty beer bottle that I pretend to drink from all night, or else I have the bartender give me a diet coke in a mixed drink class, complete with straw etc. Usually that gets people off my back. Maybe your FI could try one of those tricks??

     
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    Laylabelle    November 7, 2009  

    I don't drink AT ALL. I wish I could! Seriously two sips into anything and i have a horrible headache and feel all queasy. FI drinks often - he has beer while watching sports, etc but isn't a hard drinker, tho he will have a jager shot or two on his bday or something like that.

    What irritates me is when people find out I don't drink, then treat me like a pariah or a weirdo. And the best is " you don't drink AT ALL? Not even WINE?"

    Uh, last I checked, wine qualifies as alcohol, so that's a pretty stupid question. And I get it about twice a month.

     
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    pmerr    August 14, 2010   Rochester, NY

    I drink, but not often, & he doesn't at all. It's hard b/c he's not completely for drinking. I'm really not sure why, but he's fine when I have one once in a while but I know he wouldn't like it if I went out with friends (or my mom & uncle lol).

     
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    parfait    April 2010   Chicago, IL

    Mr. P does, but I don't drink--it just tastes weird to me.  When we're among people who are drinking, I usually have cranberry juice or sprite, so it's not like I'm without a glass.  And no one has to know what's in it. : )

     
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    lilyfaith    June 23, 2012   Lakeview, Chicago

    We drink, although we are both more laid back with it than a lot of our peers are. We'll have a glass of wine or a beer with dinner, etc. The only time I really have more than 2 drinks now is if I'm out with friends (which happens rarely because I'm broke) at a wedding, etc. 

    I've always been able to drink a lot without getting too drunk, which is odd because I'm a small person. Sometimes I won't drink around people because it's such a hassle when they assume I can't hold my liquor just because I'm small! 

    My grandfather and R's grandfather were both alcoholics... so we're really conscious of that. Corgi, I totally respect what your FI does, I understand that feeling of "I could get addicted to this really easily." That's the reason I stopped partying like I did when I was 17, 18 - I realized that I was drinking waaaay too much!

     
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    jocelyn3476       New Jersey

    I don't really drink.  I usually order a soda when everyone orders drinks.  I actually wish I enjoyed alcohol more since good wine seems so luxurious to me.  But whenever I do have a drink, I kinda wish I was drinking something else.  I never drink liquor.

    It's not awkward. But I think it would be if when someone offered me a drink, I replied with, "Oh, I don't drink" as opposed to "I'll have a diet coke."  The former makes people want to ask questions.  The latter makes people want to get me a diet coke.

    The only time it is awkward is when I do drink and end up pretty looped after one small glass of wine.

     
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    Miss Chapstick    September 2009  

    I drink on occasion. Like CorgiTales said, wine with dinner, martinis with the girls, or sometimes, after an especially rough week, my husband and I will down a bottle of wine ourselves just for the heck of it.

    But as far as hitting the bars and getting drunk-drunk - never. I did it once or twice in college, and I agree, I just felt so crappy after, that it wasn't worth it to be. I only get two days off a week, and I would prefer to not spend one minute being hungover. It's never worth it.

    My husband drinks a bit more than me. Like usually on the weekends he'll have a scotch or a couple beers to relax, but he never really gets drunk.

     
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    KMSull    August 7, 2010   Lexington, KY (via Atlanta, GA)

    I don't like the taste of alcohol, even vodka is just waaaay too strong for me. That being said, I'll have a little every once in a while "to take the egde off". No wine. Ever. Bad experience. My g-pa was an alcoholic til the day he died and I know myself well enough to know that if I started drinking more than I did now, it would be a problem. Boy, however, loves loves loves beer. He'll have one every night but he doesn't do hard liquor anymore.

    Most of both of our friends are pretty hard drinkers still, which means we don't get invited to go out, which is fine. I think we're too old to still be acting like college students, especially since I'm generally the youngest out of everyone. I am concerned about when we move back to my hometown and all my old friends expect me to hang out with them- they still can't have a dinner night or party without tons of drinking and drama and seriously? I'm just not into that.

     
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    iswimibikeirun    May 15, 2010   Houston

    When I was younger, I used to drink socially.  These days, I almost never drink.  Sure, the occassional champange toast or whatever.  FI might have a beer with dinner a couple nights a week, but rarely more than that.

    Sometimes we "mystery shop" and someone has to drink (to evaluate the bartender/server) at the fine dining establsihment.  Since he doesn't drive, he does the drinking (and doesn't mind drinking).  He calls himself my "designated drunk."  Sometimes, he'll order a glass of wine or other drink with dinner (if it's somewhere nice) because we find we get better service that way.

    But, no one gives me a hard time for sticking to water or a soda.

     
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    hamster    May 2010  

    I don't drink, and the mans has a drink every so often.  I'm allergic, and it's sometimes a little awkward when people ask "how allergic" I am - but usually, they just let it go.  My friends all know I can't drink and they're cool about it.  Whenever we go out, whoever does the bar run will usually bring me my requisite glass of water. Laughing

     

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