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Me and my FH have thought about not having a bridal party at all. There has been some problems with my girls and his boys just dont care. Do you think that it would be weird to be just us? After all it is our day
Mrs. T, I have a 16y/o girl and a 14y/o old boy from a previous marriage and they will be our bridal party. My BFF was understanding although she assumed she would be my MOH but we're trying to keep it intimate. Us and the kids, do what feels right to you.
Nope, none. We're involving people in other ways (officiating, music etc). I honestly have always sort of felt weird about the idea, particularly since so much emphasis is placed on the aesthetics. It feels like bridesmen and groomsmen are at least sometimes used as "props". The one downside is that you don't have anyone clear to handle certain duties, so you'll just have to ask people to help out without the title.
We're not doing a bridal party, just his niece and nephew as flower girl and ring bearer.
We, like MegK are involving people in other ways...officiating, singing, reading, toast, etc. I have so many girlfriends, it would be a gaggle of girls and we really just wanted something simple and intimate.
We are just having a Maid of Honor, a Best Man, and two flower girls. I'm debating about whether or not will need an usher or two. We're going to have about 100 guests so I'm just not sure.
We're not having a bridal party. Apart from having a very small wedding to begin with, we felt that many of our guests will already be spending a lot of money to travel to our wedding, and asking them to pay for dresses and all the other things associated with being in the wedding party on top of that was just too much.
A friend of mine didn't have a bridal party, and while it was obviously her choice to make, I did find one problem with it. That is, she asked a lot of people to help with stuff, but no one sort of got the "honor" of being made part of the bridal party. It just seemed like a lot of the girls that helped her out, threw the parties, etc. should have received some sort of recognition.
I should mention that I'm not one of her closer friends, so I'm sure I wouldn't have been asked if she did have a bridal party (ie, it's not that *I* wanted some sort recognition; I didn't help her out nearly as much as others, anyway).
Also, I think part of the reason that I didn't like it was that she didn't really have a reason for not having a bridal party (eg, small wedding, second wedding, drama, etc.). I think for a lot of people, it can make perfect sense, but it just didn't seem to in this case.
We're not having a bridal party. We have 6 sisters between us (and no brothers), and we didn't want anyone to feel left out. Our two oldest sisters are readers for the ceremony, but we just offerred all the sisters the chance to come along for manicures/pedicures the day before or getting the hair/make-up done the day of. Of course, we're also not asking anyone to do anything for the wedding they wouldn't have to do otherwise (i.e. go to the rehearsal dinner, show up for pictures, etc...).
I'm not having a wedding party. Mostly because I don't need one (We are LDS and getting married in the temple) and everyone I would have had in my party can't make it in time anyway. My FI and I decided to go ahead without one and just worry about us. Its actually been quite nice not having to worry about anyone else and if they will be to things on time, have their attire, have things scheduled, etc. Its so nice! =)
gown.jpeg (29.7 KB, 39 downloads) 1 year old
I didn't have one and i am so happy i didn't. my best friends know who they are, they didn't need to wear matching dresses to know that i love them. they got together and threw me a bachlorette, came dress shopping and fittings, and all the good stuff you want your best friends to do, and they all looked gorgeous at my wedding, since they got to wear what they wanted. my brothers and my sisters in law (2 of each) walked down the aisle and stood by us, as did our parents (we're jewish), and that was just perfect. no choosing between friends, no dealing with "color schemes" and bad dresses. just lots of love all around.
We didn't have a wedding party. At all. My bestests still got ready with me and I totally have no regrets for doing it this way. :o)
I don't plan on having one. At the most one person on each side if he really insists. I think its a good way to cut down drama and stress. We really don't have any "best friends" and I have all brothers and his brother wouldn't want to be by his side. I plan to welcome my closer friends to join me in getting ready, wedding dress shopping, and whatever else. I don't see the purpose of a bridal party really.
Oh wow! This is heartening. I thought I was the only one on Weddingbee NOT having a bridal party. Honestly at this point it's made the wedding planning a bit more streamlined for us. Our main reason was that if FI included everyone he felt he should include he would have had 8 groomsmen. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but that was something neither one of us wanted to take on. Plus I would have wanted at the very most 4 people
We are including people in many ways including (hopefully) a friend who will sing, a friend who will do my makeup (she volunteered), a friend who will do our toast and a DOC. So far we've heard no complaints.
We're not having a wedding party, either. Honestly, we're both in our 30's, have been in quite a few wedding parties (along with most of our friends), and kind of feel that we're past that! In our minds, everyone who attends our ceremony is taking on the duty of the wedding party and "standing up for us". As far as showers and bachelorette parties, I figure that if my girlfriends want to do something, then fabulous! Either way, they don't need to spend $400+plus to feel that they are an important part of our union.
I have no regrets about it -- and although some might feel like you need an excuse to not have a wedding party, it really doesn't matter. It's what feels right to you and your SO.
Cheers!
No wedding party here. I have no reason not to other than I just don't want to. I didn't figure any of my friends would be able to help that much with the wedding because of their schedules this time of year (most are accountants) so I really don't feel guilty about it. We have been very happy with this because several of our friends that have recently gotten married has had some serious drama with the bridal party. I'm so glad I don't have that to deal with and I can focus on my up-coming marriage.
The last wedding I went to the groom had a sister who stood with him as the Best Woman, and the bride had a brother stand as the Man of Honor. It was unique and so personal.
I'm not having a bridal party either. We're having a small ceremony and will ask our families to stand up with us for a portion, but no real wedding party at all.
We are only having a Maid of Honor and a Best Man. I think it was one of the best decisions we made. It makes it more special that we are only considering them to stand next to us on our special day. Both of them are childhood friends and is much more meaningful.
We aren't having a wedding party either. We are having a smaller ceremony (family only), and then a big reception, so we wanted to streamline. So far it has made planning easier, and less for me to think about. I am still doing some things a normal "bridal party" would do, for example my best friend, SIL, mom and SIL's to be are going to do a girls day the day before (pedicures/manicures), and they are coming to help me get ready the day off too. I'm excited!
I'm not having a Bridal party either. We opted for a desination wedding (France) and a lot of my siblings aren't able to attend, nor can most of my friends...especially with the economy the way it is. This became a real problem with my younger sister, who would most certainly be my MOH since she can't afford to attend. She was VERY angry and even said "You're dead to me" for getting married in France. She didn't speak to me for a month butafter everyone kept telling her that it was our day and we should choose to do it however and wherever we want, she finally came around. I will miss her terribly on the day of my wedding, but I wouldn't change my wedding location for anything. We are travelling with a party of 12, so we won't be alone, but our wedding will be really small so we've opted not to have a bridal party. (Besides, I could never have or want someone other than my sister for my MOH.
No, we are not having a bridal party. I have been in too many wedding parties to know the drama and stress it sometimes causes. FI and I also felt it just wasn't our thing.
No bridal party here. I was recently part of one recently and it was a huge expense (my BM dress, shoes, hair, nails, etc). After that experience, I wouldn't want to put that expense on anyone. Our parents will be upfront with us.
We are only having my SIL and brother stand with us as witnesses. Now for SIL and brother's wedding they are having 8 on each side and I am MOH #2, let tell you it's really hard trying to get everyone together for the dress fittings and all that great stuff. We are trying to work all that out before it gets too late, their date is 08/22/2009.
Wow, I thought I was a huge minority for not having a formal bridal party!! My finance and I are in our mid-twenties and have been blessed with wonderful friends in our lives. We are having a small destination Disney wedding in Florida and don't want to make our closest friends pay for travel costs and bridal attire! Our wedding is intimate with only 20 people, so it just didn't make sense to us to have some of our limited wedding guests standing up there with us, plus we didn't want to make anyone feel left out! So we are forgoing a bridal party all together. I guess I just believe that having them attend our small wedding is gesture enough and we don't necessarily need them standing up there with us to show them that we love them! 
Our bridal party is my sons..and my MOH... my 13 yr old son will be escorting me down the aisle...and my 2 other sons(11 and 9) will be standing with my FI...I'll have a MOH..but no bridesmaids....or ring bearers....
@tessabella we are doing the EXACT same thing except just one flower girl, MOH, BM and my little bro as an usher
I didn't do a wedding party at all. It was great. My best friends threw me a shower and a bachelorette party. We only had 25 guests at the wedding anyway. It was great and hassle free. My nephew held the rings, so I guess you could call him the "ring bearer" but he's 12! I didn't miss it at all.
Maybe we shouldn't have had a bridal party. His BM was his dad and my MOH was his sister.
My sister is sort of faced with this issue. She and her Fi are doing a DW. The guys that her FI wants in his bridal party, may not be able to afford the trip. So in the event that he doesn't have a bridal party, us girl, (me, our other sister, her best friend and his sister) will all wear dressing in complementary shades of blue. We'll sit up front with our parents, and also do all the bridal party things, (shower, bachelorette party, getting her ready the day of).
@MstoMrs - that's a wonderful idea! my FI and I had thought of something similar, having our friends that *would have* been in our bridal party to sit up front and everything...but the coordinating colors are a great idea - they are the something blue, I love it! I definitely still want my best friends and FI's sis to get ready with me the day of. I had planned on putting a personal invitation inside their invites for a ladies breakfast the day of, in addition to getting ready together.
I guess I just don't see the point in it all. At first I asked my friend to be my MOH but since then I've moved out of the country and we have drifted quite a bit. It turned me off to the whole MOH idea. Also, my fiance would have to have at least 3 guys on his side and to be honest he is my best friend, I don't want anyone else standing up and pretending that they are taking that place.
i don't have a bridal party and i have never thought anything of it! Our families will be up there with us holding the chuppah (wedding canopy), some of our friends will do readings throughout the ceremony, my friends will celebrate with me, and go to parties and look at dresses but just as friends! it's working out very well and i'm very happy with our decision - for us, we couldn't imagine choosing some friends and not others, so this was a happy and easy decision
Everything thinks I'm crazy for not wanting a bridal party. I've been in 3 bridal parties, I'm going to be 40 when I get married, and I just can't see asking my girlfriends who are the same age and already married with kids to put on matching dresses & hold a bouquet for photo ops. My good friends who matter will be there in attendance & all I would ask of them is to just have a good time!
Also, no gift registry, bridal shower, bachelorette/bachelor party for me or my FH also. Just doesn't seem necessary to us, and decreases the likelihood of drama flare ups, things that could go wrong, and unnecessary financial expenditures. We just want to have a little party with 125 of our closest family & friends, that's all!
I'm also thinking of not having a wedding party. My ceremony is going to be about 100-150 people so it's not that small. My friends have either moved away or we just aren't that close anymore. I have a sister, but she's just a bitch and refuses to be in my wedding and my fiance doesn't have a sister or a brother. My fiance says it's up to me to make this decision. What do you all think? I know it's my decision, but I can't help but wonder if everyone there will be wondering why there isn't a wedding party. I guess I worry too much.
@mlarson: I understand how you feel. Our wedding will be about 75-90 guests, and we are not going to have a bridal party either. I have two older sisters near 40 with kids, and I'm sure they don't want to be in my bridal party. I have a younger SIL and 2 younger FSIL, but if I ask them, then I know my sisters will feel slighted. I just don't want to deal w/the drama and added costs to have a bridal party (gifts, flowers, etc). Our ceremony will be short, and I would prefer the focus to be on us and our wedding day.
It's so encouraging to read that I am not the only one who is not having a bridal party!
i think it's completely personal and acceptable not to have a bridal party.
i did have a large bridal party and everything worked out well. I put this down to 2 reasons: 1. I didn't expect my BMs to help out with anything other than to be there on the day. If I needed help, I'd generally ask my mother or do it myself. Occasionally I'd ask the BMs opinions, but that was it.
2. I paid for their dresses and kept their expenses to a minimum. Most of my girls thanked me for this after the wedding and said it was appreciated.
We will not be having a bridal party, aside from having our little nieces and nephews as flower girls/page boy :)
I don't think it's strange at all... and we've been to MANY weddings without a bridal party in recent years.
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