Post # 1
Is anyone else having a wedding with no attendants (bridesmaids, groomsmen, MOH or BM)? This is a second wedding for both me and FI, and we have decided not to have anyone stand up with us for the ceremony except for his 8 yr old daughter. We will be including her in the ceremony with a “family vow”. We have two friends that will act as witnesses, but they will not be standing up with us. I am also not going to have anyone walk me down the aisle or give me away, as it feels rather inappropriate given my age (37) and the fact that this is a second marriage. I want the focus to be on the 3 of us coming together as a family, rather than a parade of our friends in formal wear. It’s going to make for a rather short processional, but does this seem like a reasonable thing to do?
Post # 3
It’s not mandatory to have attendants of any kind. Go with what you want to do. Also, I think it’s lovely that you’re including his daughter in the ceremony. This was a 2nd wedding for both of us as well.
My husband and I had his 2 daughters and my two dogs as “honorary attendants/ring-bearers” for our wedding a few months ago. The girls each walked up the aisle with a pup and then sat down in the front row. We had 2 flower girls as well, but it was very informal. Beyond that, the only other people we recognized were his mom and her husband, and my parents.
Post # 4
@Miss Mauverick: Your ceremony sounds lovely! What a cute idea, having his girls walk the dogs up the aisle.
Post # 5
We, too, are having a family vow. We have full custody of his two kids, I’m not marrying just him, I’m taking on a whole family. (We’ve lived together for a year, I’m “mom” to them, sd4 can’t even remember life before me)
No other guests or attendants. It’s #3 for both of us.
Post # 6
This is my first wedding and I will be 29 yrs old. I have 2 close friends that live far away and don’t even know if they’ll make it and no idea if my parents will attend either.
But regardless, I decided from the very beginning that I did not want anyone walking down the aisle except for me. This is MY day! Why should other people be paraded down the aisle like it’s a pony show? I also like the idea that everyone can sit back and enjoy the day.
I, too, worry about the short “processional” but I think all in all, guests will be rather pleased with having a shorter ceremony and “getting to the point”. 🙂
Post # 7
I was married previously when I was 20. I’m 30 now, and I have two boys aged 9 and 7. It is my fiance’s first marriage. We are not having any attendants. Whether or not our ceremony is inside or out depends upon weather, but if it is outside we will have the center aisle tied off with ribbon, my kids will come out and untie the ribbon, then I will walk down. Short, sweet, personal ceremony and then time for partying and cake!
We’ll play two meaningful songs before the ceremony begins, and I’ll walk down to…something (haven’t figured out what exactly yet, but our other songs are Ho Hey! by the Lumineers and Home by Philip Phillips.)
I think you should do whatever will make the day the most special for you and your new family 🙂
Post # 8
We’re not having any attendants. I have a few reasons for making that decision.
We are having a small wedding, 60 people max. If I chose to have a bridal party, we would have about 16 people, that’s a quarter or our guests!
I dislike bridesmaids dresses, and things that are too matchy.
Everyone lives very far away.
I also just wanted to completely avoid any sort of drama.
Post # 9
Our processional was super short as well due to no attendants, but no one noticed or cared.
Post # 10
Thanks everyone for the input. Glad to hear we’re not the only ones going this route. Ours will be a very small wedding as well, probably 45-50 people. I was a little worried that BFF would be disappointed at not being asked to stand up, but she was MOH for my first wedding, so I hope she’ll be happy to act as a witness only. Of course, she’ll wind up doing all the MOH duties, she just won’t get the title or have to shell out for some ugly dress she’ll never wear again.